How do I convince my mother I'm not depressed?

Question

I like to be alone most of the time. Does this mean I am depressed?

I'm 20 I live with my mother. I go to school. I don't work. I have one friend and I would rather hang out with her than be alone. I just don't like my famliy and would prefer it if they left me alone.

Answer 1

Oh, honey.

I'm almost 30 years old, and have been a super introvert my entire life. I need alone time like other people need oxygen. I am a part of a family of really social, extroverted people and they all think I'm manic depressive because I'm not just like them. I've been dealing with it my entire life.

All you can do is just tell them you're fine and you just like to be alone. It's their problem if they don't believe you.

Answer 2

The way to convince your mother you're not depressed is to figure out what reason your mother has for thinking this, and to respond to that, rather than to continually, unsuccessfully defend yourself against the accusation you're depressed.

That said, the reason your mother says this may have little to nothing to do with you being depressed (or not). Allow me to toss out some random ideas (since I don't know your circumstances)--and you can then come up with some ideas of your own:

--Your mother says you're depressed because she is unwilling to admit that she is lonely. You spend most of your free time alone or with your friend, and she would like to spend time with you.

--Simple transference of emotion is another possibility. She is depressed, and instead of saying so, she says you are depressed. This behavior is quite common. Have you ever known anybody who will say to you, "Do you want to get something to eat?" when they are the one who is hungry? Maybe they'll even repeat the question if you tell them you are not hungry.

So, the answer to resolving this is probably to figure out what HER deal is, not yours. Once you do figure it out, be sympathetic and subtle about approaching her. The reason she is transferring, after all, is because she is uncomfortable dealing with her feelings openly.

Enjoying solitude doesn't mean you're depressed. But to make sure, perhaps you could try an online evaluation, such as the one here: http://www.med.nyu.edu/psych/screens/depres.html
If it shows you have a preponderance of depressive symptoms, you can seek help from a counselor or physician.

Answer 3

I understand what you feel.
I also am an introvert, usually misunderstood by people. I'd rather be alone that be in a busy crowd full of strangers..
And yeah.. some people think that I'm depressed, just because I'm like this.
The only advise that I could give you is to tell them that you're fine, and of course, get on with your life. Do your thing. I mean, if you study or work, learn to love it.. Plunge in, don't hesitate. And eventually, you might gain new friends.

By the way..
What makes your mom think that you're depressed? Were you not as introverted as you were before?
What makes you feel that you don't like your family?

Also, If you're really concerned about your condition, you can always contact a psychologist. Not because you're nuts or something, but because they're experts in dealing with different types of personalities. They might know something that could really help.

Answer 4

It never did in my case...there are people in this world who like noise and other people around them all the time,,,they don't function well alone....then there are people like me, who had, for the most part, rather be alone for long periods of time...I like to read, and when I was a little girl, I would climb up in this tree with a book and read all about Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys.....I am still like that..I love my husband dearly, but when he is away for a little while,,,I just revel in the quite,,he on the other hand, needs people around him. So, I don't think it is depression but your Mom knows you better than me, so maybe you should get out more...

Answer 5

Wanting to be alone doesn't necessarily mean you're depressed!

Maybe you should try and talk to your mother... tell her you just like being alone -- tell her you're an independent person and that you've grown up.

If talking doesn’t work for you and your mother.. you might want to try and find out what it is that is making your mother think your depressed... try and change it!

Perhaps your mother doesn’t actually think you’re depressed... maybe she just wants to spend some time with you!

REMEMBER: Do NOT start yelling at each other about it and don’t ever tell her "I don't care" cuz evidently you do!

Answer 6

No, it does not mean you're depressed. I spend all of my time alone, and I'm perfectly normal. The best way to convince your mother you're not depressed is to spend some time with her and your friends. Your mom is just concerned about what's best for you, so humor her once in a while.

Answer 7

First, you should determine if you are depressed or not.

Are either of the following true?

* Loss of interest in normal daily activities. You lose interest in or pleasure from activities that you used to enjoy.
* Depressed mood. You feel sad, helpless or hopeless, and may have crying spells.

In addition, for a doctor or other health professional to diagnose depression, most of the following signs and symptoms also must be present for at least two weeks.

* Sleep disturbances. Sleeping too much or having problems sleeping can be a sign you're depressed. Waking in the middle of the night or early in the morning and not being able to get back to sleep are typical.
* Impaired thinking or concentration. You may have trouble concentrating or making decisions and have problems with memory.
* Changes in weight. An increased or reduced appetite and unexplained weight gain or loss may indicate depression.
* Agitation. You may seem restless, agitated, irritable and easily annoyed.
* Fatigue or slowing of body movements. You feel weariness and lack of energy nearly every day. You may feel as tired in the morning as you did when you went to bed the night before. You may feel like you're doing everything in slow motion, or you may speak in a slow, monotonous tone.
* Low self-esteem. You feel worthless and have excessive guilt.
* Less interest in sex. If you were sexually active before developing depression, you may notice a dramatic decrease in your level of interest in having sexual relations.
* Thoughts of death. You have a persistent negative view of yourself, your situation and the future. You may have thoughts of death, dying or suicide.

If most of the above are not happening - you are probably fine. If more than a couple are happening, I would strongly recommend talking with a doctor familiar with treating depression. It could lead to an *AMAZING* improvement in your life.

Finally, if you and your mother go through the Mayo Clinic web page http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression/DS00175/DSECTION=2
and you are not having the symptoms of depression listed there, that should go a long way toward convincing her you are not depressed.

Many teenagers like to spend a lot of their time alone. It can be a normal thing.

Answer 8

You may not be depressed, but you could have a dis-association disorder.

You do not like your family? Then why stay there, be a burden of them having to take care of you, and you use them so you can live there rent free and without any responsibilities. Move in with your one friend and get a job to take care of yourself. After all, you are 20 years of age. You need to grow up.

Answer 9

I salute your individuality and warn you that to change a seek the approval of the others around you will be hazardous. The majority of people are speaking a separate language from yours as they have formed secret groups. You are happy with what you know. Great, now help some that have fallen into the pit of hoping for group approval by the winners.

Answer 10

Well stay happy and keep a smile on your face. Try doing somethings around the house and dont sit around all day watching TV. Go on a jog around the neighborhood or something, or just hang out with a friend. Hope this helps you..... OH YEA- and keep a possative attitude and try not to be so sarcastic!!