My roomate was upset because a girl sent him a letter saying that he is a fat clumsy nerd who cant get a woman. As a civil engineering student he used a computer option in which he forwarded the letter to all of his teachers in the civil engineering department. Would it have been best for him to delete the message and throw it away since it was only an insult and not a threat?
2007-10-20 05:35:55 · 20 answers · asked by Scott 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell me this isn't true in Badger land, as I'm originally from Wisconsin, just kidding it happens everywhere.
It would have been best for him to write the e-mail to get the outrage out of his system, but then to save it under drafts and do not send as you said it was only an insult.
Help your roomate understand that this was just one stupid opinion from one person who lacks any civility and charm. The email he received was not who he is, but someone's stupid opinion they should have kept to themselves. Remind him, if he has a sense of humor that he may now be overweight but he can lose that; but there's no losing her stupidity; she'll never spend a clueful moment in her life.
Let him know it was a disgusting email that holds no basis in reality unless he makes it his reality.
His self esteem was lowered no doubt by the email and his response did not help others see him in a postivie nature. Just try to be his friend and get his mind off the experience. This is a situation that happens to just about everyone in their life where they lose their temper and send off an email they regret. It's good that he maybe learned this now than when he gets into the employment world where his reaction could have cost him respect and if sent to the wrong person his job.
2007-10-20 06:03:46 · answer #1 · answered by cheap advice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait....
He told all his teachers in the Civil Engineering Department that a girl thinks he is a fat, clumsy, nerd who can't get a woman?
WHY?
What on Earth did he expect THEM to do about it?
So some girl says he's a fat clumsy nerd who can't get a woman... and now he has pretty much confirmed her opinion by spreading this around to the entire faculty at his school... thus involving the professors in his private life, something which is none of their business in the first place and NOT something they want to be involved in.
I'm sure someone has done something even stupider than this at one time or another in human history... but I really can't think of when right now.
He needs to RECALL and DELETE that message as quickly as possible.
And if he is lucky everyone will just pretend they didn't get it.
2007-10-20 12:44:02 · answer #2 · answered by Larry R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, even if it is not - I'm coming over to kick your butt - an insult is still a form of bullying. He already has low self-esteem, and has probably suffered from rejection all his life in school and dating situations.
If he plans on filing a complaint against the girl then try to be understanding. But in the future, I suggest sending him to a councilor. Especially if he starts to show signs of depression. As an adult, that message should have just been deleted, unless it continued.
2007-10-20 12:45:01 · answer #3 · answered by rulestheroostwithkindness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the horse is already out of the barn... too late to unsend the message.
But, I have to admit I respect what he did. I don't think men talk enough about being the objects of verbal and emotional abuse.
Men can be victims of relationship abuse.
What this woman did was cruel, I just hope his educators take seriously that this girl's letter was threatening. If a record is kept about this complaint, it will protect your room mate if there are any further problems with this girl.
Sincerely,
Loretta
www.lifebeyondlupus.com
2007-10-20 12:44:36 · answer #4 · answered by Loretta 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
probably woulda been better to just delete it and move on. she obviously doesnt like him, so why keep making a fuss. the only thing that doing something like that would do is further embarass him. itll be ok though, civil engineers probably make good money, once hes out of college im sure everything will work out.
college girls are usually pretty stupid anyways.
2007-10-20 12:40:00 · answer #5 · answered by traeLocura 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why of course he should have deleted that letter. I wouldnt be worried if he is embarrassed or suffering from low self esteem since he took this action - I would be concerned that maybe he is unstable and not making rational decisions. To send this kind of letter to his professors is insane - a stable person would not do that.
2007-10-20 12:40:30 · answer #6 · answered by livelongandprosper2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's "embrass" and only he knows how he felt, however it was foolish to forward the note to all his instructors. As a college student, he should've handled the issue himself or just ignored it (which would've been best). He should be past the age of telling his teachers someone called him a name.
2007-10-20 12:40:42 · answer #7 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do whatever you want and stop trying to get sympathy. If you are fat, slim down, if you are a nerd, change and if you don´t get women, you will just go blind from over use of member
2007-10-20 12:41:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why would he send that around? He wants people to know what one girl said about him? Delete it and throw it away! It's only one persons opinion, why bother?
2007-10-20 12:39:17 · answer #9 · answered by punch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what was he trying to accomplish by forwarding the letter? yes, he should have ignored the message, but not deleted it if he found it threatening or harassing.
2007-10-20 12:40:02 · answer #10 · answered by a heart so big 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋