she is just getting used to seeing her daddy at weekends and we try never to say bad things about her daddy in front of her as she has the right to build a good relationship with him and when she is older she will get told the truth and can make her own mind up!
2007-10-20 03:41:41 · 27 answers · asked by DEBS 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
you say to get her excited about a new half sibling and i understand why but its sooo hard when the person whos having the baby helped break the family up! it would be much easier if he had found somone who wasnt involved in the breakup as i have no love for him but still detest her! i will try tho!!!
2007-10-20 04:01:29 · update #1
No. there is no unresolved issues with her dad.he did what he did many many times and i feel nothing for him except i HAVE to be ok with him for my childs sake.As for you asking about "her" of course i still have an issue with her!i would be a liar to say other wise, even tho my life has turned out for the better now and everyone tells me i should be thanking her!!,,,,,,what goes around...! thanks for advice anyway x
2007-10-21 02:57:27 · update #2
Ah you sound like a good and caring mummy
Well she has two parents and I think you should discuss this matter with him in a civilised way. I'm sure you can do this because you sound like you want to put her first and I assume he feels the same way. You have common ground there. This baby will be her brother or sister and part of her family, she has a right to know and has nothing to lose by having a relationship with this child.
You both need to speak to her about this together as her parents I think. This would be the most sensible thing to do.
Also, you need to let your ex know that no matter what, he has two children. Yes a baby is hard work but he can not neglect his commitment to one child to favour another. Make sure he keeps up his contact regularly and is there when he is meant to be there. No excuses. This is important for the well being of your child since she already has established a routine with him.
take care
Lady S
x
2007-10-20 04:03:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you're having more of a problem with this than your daughter will be. I understand if you're uncomfortable with the situation, however don't reflect this on your daughter.
If the father hasn't told her, why? Is he too far away to explain to a 5 year old what pregnancy is? How did you find out?
If your daughter is going to be around the pregnancy, or half-sibling, eventually I would tell her with enthusiasm. This may not be an exciting time for you but there is no reason shown here why it shouldn't be an exciting time for your daughter.
Buy a book for a child her age that explains pregnancy so she can understand the concept. Remember, life goes on and this half-sibling will be her family too.
Would you have a problem telling her if you were pregnant? Probably not.
2007-10-20 04:01:01 · answer #2 · answered by Pinched 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
keep it undemanding and in basic terms answer the questions he asks. mutually with "How do babys get of their" "Daddy plant life a seed and it grows right into a sprint one in my tummy". it fairly is it I doubt that a 5 three hundred and sixty 5 days previous will decide so which you would be able to problematic on that. As for his mom you are able to truly make him sense enjoyed and mandatory in spite of everything he would be the particular great brother!! Make a fuss ask him what contemporary he might decide for to purchase for his sisters/brothers. enable him comprehend that he will play a huge area being the great brother and that he's extremely plenty a factor of this relatives. enable him comprehend that he's specific because of the fact he has his mummy who loves him and he has his daddy and you who love him too. i'm specific it is going to all paintings out and on the top of the day if his mom truly is that nasty he will advance to resent her no longer you and the infants.
2016-12-15 04:39:36 · answer #3 · answered by newcomer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just come straight out with it, there is no reason at all why this should cause her a trauma. Present it to her as good news and point out how much she'll enjoy being the big sister.
5 year olds are hard as nails, don't try to be over protective of her sensibilities, the lessons of life are learned through experiencing events and our emotional reactions towards those events.
2007-10-20 04:03:42 · answer #4 · answered by psymon 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
just tell her, stop making it out to be a big deal. this is not a traumatic thing for a child to hear. most kids today are in families with half brothers or sisters and kids really do not care and are a lot more adaptable than adults. the only way she will think that something is wrong is if you make a big deal about it all. stop watching oprah.
2007-10-20 03:53:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't tell her. That is her father's job. As her mother, it is your job to be supportive of her new sibling when she asks you questions. Be excited for her, it will make it a lot easier for her to accept the baby. You can even take her shopping before the baby is born so that she can give her brother/sister a present. She will have some off the wall questions, so be ready...
2007-10-20 03:47:53 · answer #6 · answered by Jen M 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
let them tell her, then when she comes home asking questions tell her how lovely it will be for her to have a baby brother or sister, and how she can help with the new baby and how much she can love him/her, get her to make something for the new baby and make a card with her when the baby is born.
Edit: Is this about your worries for your child? or your unresolved issues about your ex and the other woman?
2007-10-20 03:51:28 · answer #7 · answered by Smoochy Poochy 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I had this with my ex and my two girls recently. just be very honest and answer any questions, its more about your reaction, if your very upset about this she will pick up on it, if you are fine it should be easier for her to understand, talk about different kinds of familys with her, read stories about others or make games with toys. Your views and feelings on this will be her guiding point, so if you dont think you can comfortably get some help from friends or other family members
2007-10-20 03:54:35 · answer #8 · answered by kali d 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Say that she's going to have a new baby brother or sister who will just live with her daddy and you can mention that you're not the new baby's mommy but direct her attention to "isn't this exciting?" more than all the questions you probably don't want to answer.
2007-10-20 03:51:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I agree with Jen. Your EX should tell her when it is close for the baby to be born. You both need to reassure her that he will still be a part of her life and how much fun she will have as a big sister.
2007-10-20 03:50:44 · answer #10 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋