English question?

Question

Here's a translation into English from Japanese that I made myself as a non-native English writer:

"My passion for painting started when I was a little child. It was around age 13, when I grew more and more interested in painting, that I started playing around with my father's PC. I was amazed at just how fun it is to paint on a computer. Then I learned how to draw pictures on a PC the way I want them to be. I felt like my dream was getting closer to a reality.
My dreams are to learn the basics of computers;
to become skilled enough in computer graphics to be able to paint in any way I want; and eventually to get a graphic job. Simply put, I hope my dream of making my hobby my career will some day come true."

Does it sound right? Any suggestion on if there's any bad grammar or misused words or whatever would be appreciated.

Answer 1

Good-just need a few small changes:
My passion for painting started when I was a child at around age 13. As I grew, I became more and more interested in painting and started playing around with my father's pc. I was amazed at just how fun it was to paint on a computer. Then I learned how to draw pictures on the pc the way I wanted them to be. It felt like my dream was getting closer to a reality.
My dream is to learn the basics of computers, to become skilled enough in computer graphics to be able to paint in any way I want, and eventually to get a computer graphics job. Simply put; I hope my dream of making my hobby my career will some day come true.

Answer 2

It might just be me, but I would say "small child" rather than "little child".
I would say "as I was growing more and more interested in painting" in the middle of the second sentence, and "amazed to see just how fun" in the third. Either "*It* felt like my dream was getting closer to becoming reality" or "I felt my dream getting closer to becoming reality". I find including "learning the basics of computers" as part of your dreams odd--I would assume you already know the basics since you are using the internet and graphics programmes. I wouldn't put the ; in that sentence, either, and I agree with a previous poster that "graphic job" should be something like "a job creating computer graphics" (I'm not sure exactly what job you mean). I would put "someday" all one word.

Hope that helps--I don't mean to be too discouraging, your English is really good and I wouldn't call what I gave really "corrections" just "suggestions".

Answer 3

I would change PC to computer

and

"paint in any way I want; and eventually to get a graphic job."
i would rephrase that sentence to: "and eventually get a job in graphics."

Answer 4

You:I was amazed at just how fun it is to paint on a computer. Then.
Me: computer, then
You:my hobby my career will some day come true."
Me:my hobby, my career

Answer 5

You should say, "...., when i had grown more and more interested in painting.."