Barefoot at a friend's house?

Question

I'm 17 years old and live in a part of the country that is usually warm most of the year. As a result, I've always liked going barefoot whenever possible inside and outside. My question is, after school, if I go over to a friend's house to study, is it okay to take my tennis shoes and socks off? How can I do this, or ask her mother about this without seeming rude? It's funny, most people don't mind if you just kick your sandals or flats off, but if it's shoes AND socks, I've heard some people get offended. What can I do?

And

Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Answer 1

I say you should ask just be like, "Would you mind if I take my socks off?" or "Is it okay if I go barefoot?".

Be polite and I am sure she will be impressed that you display good manners and I am sure she won't mind taking off both your tennis shoes and socks. I know at my house if you asked I would let you.

I have sought of been in a similar situation at work when I wanted to walk around the office in bare feet. I asked my supervisor and she encouraged me to go barefoot at work all the time if I felt more comfortable. If in doubt ask and be polite.

Answer 2

I go barefoot just about everywhere, and also am concerned about entering other people's houses.
As you observed, most people won't care at all if you remove your shoes but keep on your socks.
And, most people wonl;t object to kicking off the sockless sandals and slip-ons.
Since I am barefoot already, I am more concerned that the homeowner doesn't "think" that I am tracking in more dirt than the shoe wearers, because despite the fact that scientific studies have proven beyond a doubt that bare feet walking around outside are cleaner than shoes some people still incorrectly think otherwise.
So, I sometimes wipe my soles with a wet-nap type product, if it makes them any happier.
I would guess that the biggest resistance would be to removing shoes and socks. Most people think that your previously enclosed feet will be sweaty and smelly, and filled with bacteria. In some cases, they just may be right!
As Sheriam said, why not just de-sock before arriving?
Also, you said that you like going barefoot, and live in a warm place. Why bother with shoes and socks except when needed as tools for certain sports or certain work activities?
Bare feet are much healthier and safer than many people believe.
Do yourself a favor and visit "The Society for Barefoot Living"
( www.barefooters.org )
There you will find that you are not alone in your preference to go barefoot, and that it is much more acceptable than you might believe to just go barefoot full time!
Many members of the group used to wear shoes to work, school, or for shopping and eating out because thay thought that they had to. Once learning the truth, they became barefoot just about everywhere.
I've been going barefoot everywhere during the warm enough months for years. But, in the winter when I pull off socks in a persons house I find it less accepted than my bare feet are in the months that they haven't had shoes on for weeks and weeks.

Answer 3

It depends. Is the friend someone you know well with a laid back, relaxed attitude? By all means. Is it someone you know is a stickler for etiquette? Then it's doubtful. If the friend is barefoot, then the answer is obvious that it's fine. I actually know some people who prefer you pull off your shoes so you won't track in dirt. If it's a close friend, just ask.

Answer 4

There is nothing wrong with bare feet. It's pretty silly that people are so easily offended by feet; they're more like hands than like any other body part, and no one is offended by bare hands. I guess the reason that more people are okay with taking sandals or flats off and not shoes and socks, is that feet coming out of closed shoes are more likely to smell. 'Foot odor' should really be called 'shoe odor'; it's produced not by the sweat itself but by bacteria breaking down sweat in anaerobe circumstances -with little or no oxygen. It doesn't happen with bare feet, and not much with sandals (unless they're the synthetic kind with places under straps & sole that trap the sweat). But if your feet don't smell, then there shouldn't be any problem with you taking your shoes off even if you were wearing socks and closed shoes. Of course, asking would be nice but really as far as bare feet are concerned it shouldn't be necessary, any more than it should be necessary to ask if you can be bare-handed or if it's okay if you aren't wearing a hat. I've been barefoot for over ten years and I've never asked anyone if I could; I've never had a friend say it's not okay with them either. Of course here in the Netherlands there isn't much anti-barefoot bias, no businesses with rules and signs against it either, so while going barefoot is unusual, very very few people would even think of it as offensive.

Of course, if you have indeed noticed it's usually okay to take off sandals, a simple solution would be to change into sandals before going to your friends place, even if you were wearing shoes and socks. Then you can slip those off without being afraid of negative comment.

Answer 5

I agree with those who suggest asking your friend's mother. Believe me, you never lose points with a friend's parents by showing them some consideration! People, as the answers here show, have very different opinions about these things and for some reason feet particularly gross out some folks. Asking is good form (and it's never "thinking way too hard" to consider whether or not you're being considerate or offensive!).

Answer 6

I never tried this at a gf's but I see no problem with it. Of course, as a courtesy, it's always best to ask her mother if they mind you going barefoot at their home. It's a good courtesy to give.

Answer 7

I've never been in that situation but I don't see a problem with it. Just do what's comfortable with you.

Answer 8

I always ask but most people I know expect you to take your shoes off before coming into the house. I live in the country and people don't want mud and cow poo on their carpets. Socks are optional. Come to my house and I will be offended if you don't take your shoes off.

Answer 9

I think that even if you ask, they might so it's okay, even if it's offensive to them. My suggestion would be to take a pair of flip-flops with you. You'd air out your tootsies, but not have bare feet on their floors.

Answer 10

The best I can say is 1st, does everyone have their shoes and socks off? 2nd, ask your friend if if you can. 3rd, don't wear shoes and socks if you know you are going to her house, or just keep your socks on.