What do you do when you are denied the answers you need to hear?

Question

To put this question in context, I was raised in a religious family and the religion was not what I would consider a pleasant one. Some would call it a cult. Many of their teachings left me hurt
and confused, as did the upbringing I had. It took me a long time to begin to heal.
I often feel that I need answers. But the members of that religion, especially on this forum, either tell me to be quiet (they even sent me emails telling me to 'be silent') or refuse to comment. My mother won't discuss it with me either.

So what do you do, when you have unresolved issues which you need answers to in order to move on, but you are denied those answers?

typicalnotme: What I mean, is when I have asked questions here, on Yahoo Answers, other users of that religion have emailed me.

((((((((Penguin))))))))) I tried that the other day...and got my fingers burnt :(

r u randy: I've posted the questions before, they have frequently been deleted.

Some of the others are ones I have difficulty posting here because of their nature. The people specifically involved won't give me an explanation.

How can a parent stand by and watch a child get abused or injured and do nothing?

Why do Jehovah's Witnesses allow children to bleed to death? The scriptures state not to eat blood, I don't understand how that translates into not using it for medical procedures.

I did have and still do have guilt for 'not believing'. How does one 'believe' when fundamental beliefs are constantly revised and changed? I was taught Armagedon would come before everyone born in 1914 died. This belief has now been revised and they teach something utterly different.

The more I think about what I'm confused over, the more confused I get.

Answer 1

It sounds like what you are looking for is closure--a reassurance that things were not as bad as you think they were or an acknowledgement by the parties involved stating that there is some form of remorse for their actions. I could be way off, but you weren't too specific. If I'm right, then unfortunately you will not receive that closure until the other people involved are on level ground mentally and emotionally with you.

Some religions take priority over family and emotional ties. Cults take that misplacing of priorities to a completely different level. You will have to reconcile your situation within yourself. I know that its hard when you've been raised to believe something all your life, but in the back of your mind felt it was wrong. Acknowledgement of that is a start. Learning to grow and move on in the absence of the closure is step two. Maybe in time you will get what you want, but you can't stand still until it comes. Life doesn't work that way.

Answer 2

Hmmm, well, you could try talking to, as some have suggested, friends or get professional help... or you could find a support group...... or you could write down the questions, in some order of need or importance and ask them on here, one at a time..... giving urself the time to study and think about each answer given..... but, be warned, not all on here are serious... I , myself, find at times, advice from strangers, those who know nothing about the situation, can give insights to problems..... they put a different perspective on it....... so try a question, maybe a simple one, and see how it goes......... go in peace...... God bless
PS. I am sorry that your life as come to this point... and I am glad that you are in the healing stage.....
Edit: when asking a question keep it general, do not state your denomination, just ask a straight question.... I promise, if I am able, I will give a straight up answer..... I will give verses to back up any Biblical answer, if that is what you wish......

Answer 3

If the answers are not the ones you seek, I think it's best to rephrase the question and be specific about some points. You may reveal what your religion is you're not happy with instead of merely saying that many call it a cult. I suggest you read books on various religion and be the one to decide the one that would best suit your purpose in life.

Answer 4

Quick explanation...for years and years...i thougt that all i really needed to "move on" or "get closure" was to find out how and why some of the things happened to me the way that they did....
My experience has been, that there are no anwers to the questions you seek....people deal with every situation the very best they can at any possible time.
My strength and hope i have to offer, is to allow to empathize with the other person, figuratively speaking that is...and means that we do not have any way of knowing for sure what was going throught their heads at that point in time...
My hope is that you cn get some closure knowing that the only thing you can do is accept it and move on...perha[s the divine is saving you through all of this to allow someone in a similar situation to gain some hope from your experience and that would allow them one more day....

blessings to you
i hope you find what it is you seek

)o(
trintiy

Answer 5

Wow that became long. ok: a million. "something you do in comparison to regarding the character, if so what ought to be replaced?" This character's character is basically too suited. After the abuse from his father and the loss of life of his dad and mom, he has to have some flaws in his character. a guy that has suffered that plenty might probable be greater of an indignant, stricken, and extremely quiet form of toddler. 2. "Any suggestions for the residing arrangements for this character?" nope. 3. "Positives and negatives regarding the guy?" nicely, needless to say the character would not adventure his previous life. And the crimson eyes... very unrealistic and basically... unusual for a guy. As for positives, it form of sounds such as you have positioned a great form of attempt into this guy. i like the way you gave him a desirable previous life and the "nightmares". 4. "Any good own flaws for a character?"...what? 5. "comments?" i'm questioning what this tale is approximately?? 6. "ought to the cousin be a guy or a woman?" Uhh.. nicely I say a guy cousin that's rather effective. i don't be attentive to a girl cousin that seems after him can basically get... awkward. 7. "How previous ought to the cousin be?" you are able to pick this. 8. "Married or single cousin?" Does it count? ok... good success

Answer 6

I'm very sorry that this happened to you. The 'be silent' really struck a chord with me. There are two things you can do. You can keep trying. Look to outside resources for help. Online support groups or factual text that may hold answers. Or you can put that little part of you aside and move on without those answers. You are who you are without them. You have a right to be happy without them. I hope you find what you need to heal!

Answer 7

wow, tash! you sure get to the 'heart' of things, don't you? you know my beliefs. i don't hide them or make apologies for them...neither do i expect people to agree-just keep asking the questions...we're all spiritual beings on a human journey, and there are many paths that can be followed, and many people forge their own. the inability of some to come up with a coherent answer is actually an answer in itself-anyone whose response is 'shut up, keep quiet' knows that there's nothing there for them to stand on...here are a few thoughts...keep in mind the 'serenity prayer'...sometimes you have to let go for the sake of your own peace of mind...i've had situations where i got no 'resolution' and i finally had to kick the whole thing to the curb. there's a song that comes to mind, i hope i have the lyrics right:

love when you can
cry when you have to
be who you must, that's a part of the plan
await your arrival with simple survival
and one day we'll all understand

{{{{{{{{{{TASH}}}}}}}}}}

Answer 8

my grandfather used to all ways tell me "there ain't no such thing as common sense, if so we all would have it, but we all have the ability to have either good or bad sense" what you choose is up to you, you are going to reap benefits or consequences from your choices use what the Lord God gave you & most times if you pay attention you will get the message i guess i am hard headed ( just joking) :-)
if you are under age i suggest that you speak to a school official who can direct you to a counselor where you parents have to comply believe you me there are other sources besides the "cult members" you refer to including your parents hang on in there it will get better with time (((((bbh)))))) the best to you

Answer 9

Even so-called mainstream religions are still 'cults' - in which they fed their believers and the public, too - their myths - that in order to accept/believe in these myths, you have to discard your common sense. That is why there are so many unbelievers, and those who remain unconvinced - because there is never any concrete proof or evidence of any kind.
The Bible is not proof.

People quote from the Bible (or similar text) because they have no proof at all.

You will know within yourself, what answers you agree with - when you hear them from someone else, or another source...

Answer 10

You can talk to me. there are also many good websites that can have biblical answers only. and You can Pray for god to show you what the truth is.

Any real christian will not be afraid of your inquiries and answer to the best of their knowledge no matter what their feelings are.

This is my new favorite website to get your questions answered. It is based on scripture. May god bless you and if you need help, just e mail me....I have also found Dwayne Wayne to be balanced ans answer without bias, also Hannah J Paul is cool too.
http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=utf-8&fr=slv8-&p=65%20questions%20for%20jehovah%27s%20witnesses

Spike is a fogelberg fan..Me too!~

(((Tash))) It took me 18 long years of regular study and prayer to get their Bu!! out of my mind. You have been spiritually abused, and it takes strong support to deprogram. You will not get your answers form the people who are still involved in this Cult. Spiritual abuse is the worst form, because they block your abiliity to ask the questions that need to be asked to heal. I will keep you in my prayers, and ask god tohelp you with this painful but wonderful process.