How can a mom become abusive to one of her children?

Question

How does that happen?
I am the victim of my mom's abuse and want to know how a person can do awful things to a person they made.

i mean.. i am my mom's daughter.
When i have children i will cherish them. i cannot contemplate such a love i'd have for my own kid...

i am 1 of 4 kids in my family.
why me?
my mom waits on my other siblings hand and foot...

thanks trace and i am sorry. i have done the same. social workers and CPS have interviewed my on multiple occasions for each of my parents. i tried running away but came back before the week was over. some guy tried to get me into his car. i ran. called my dad. and then lived with my grandparents for 4 months. one time i sent myself to another state. i stayed there for 70 days.

and yes i have read a child called it. and it is horribly sad. but my mom has hit and kicked me and i've gotten black eyes from both of my parents.



i just don't see how it works. i am probably the most sensitive of the kids. i cannot cry anymore (my theory is i've used up my tear supply already!) but i have a good heart. both of my parents have actually said so.

but thanks...

Answer 1

I know. I see my friends getting slapped and hit and verbally abused by both parents and I just can't understand how anybody could do such a thing. I'm thankful that my parents wouldn't pinch me, but they do lecture me to death. >_>

Answer 2

Hey sweet, I can hear you dilemma, and I just want to let you in on something, ITS NOT YOU, it doesn't matter who you are or your relationship to them sometimes people have a personality clash even mum's and children, now saying that does not mean its ok for your mum to treat you badly because it not, but maybe you could sit down and have a talk to her and explain how you feel and maybe find out how she feels, sounds like she's scared of something, I have had to do this with one of my boys that i clashed with.
I don't think your mum loves you any less or the others more, just different.
Have a look at what she has to do through the day, or try and provide to keep you all happy (in my experience its never enough)
Do you help from the heart, do you winge when asked to do something,
There is so much going on when your a mum and so much to worry about, if i do this the kids will be happy if i get this they will be happy.
Normally if your mum's yelling she needs help and its the only way she knows.
Have a talk to her tell her how you feel, find out what shes really mad about, you might be surprised, and keep a level tone when doing it because its not what you say its how you say it. (you may need to do this a few times) or write a letter.
Take care

Answer 3

This is assuming that your mom is really abusing you. If so, then she's weak. She hasn't been able to overcome past issues in her life, and now she's taking it out on you. Why you? I dunno. Only your mom knows that. It is mostly impossible for anyone else to be able read a person's mind.

Also, sometimes a parent may do things or say things out of temporary disappointment, because they feel they raised you better, or their heart just happened to rule over rationality at the given moment or moments. Parents are probably a child's only true well wishers.

This is all about circumstance. Circumstance plays a role in determining what type of parent a person might be. It's like some parents want to be able to love their child, but can't because they haven't learn to love themselves.

Just keep asking questions and seek help when you need it. Time and understanding will conquer. This I promise.

Answer 4

wow!that is harsh!
mayb its because ur mom has something in the past tht she hasnt gotten over and now u could of reminded her of tht thing and she just cant get over it.ur other siblings must of just not reminded her of anything in the past so she doesnt really do anyting to them.i always get hit or slap when i do something wrong but if my parents try and kill me or someting i would run far far far far away as possible.and maybe live wit my uncle or aunt on the other side of the country.i have thought of suiside and was real close but then my friends found out and stopped me because they didnt want to lose me.they r good friends though.dont ever think of suiside because there's someone out there that cares bout u.so just giveing u a warning.

Answer 5

i know. my mum has choked me twice and has slapped me around a bit and called me names my entire life, yet she waits on my 2 older siblings hand and foot all the time and gives them money whenever they want it. just think of the day when u finally move out, that's all i did. i actually ran away because i was scared for my life and my step father was also sexually abusing me. i can't understand myself how people can do that to their own children. when i have children of my own, i'll never lay a single hand on them in that fashion or manner.

Answer 6

i don't know hon. i'm sorry she treats you so badly. i've always felt that my mom treated me worse than she did my brother. so my heart goes out to you. the only thing i can think of with my mom is that she always said how sensitive my brother is and that she couldn't bear to yell at him because when he was a little kid and she would yell at him, he would start crying, blah blah blah whatever. (and apparently i didn't cry so she didn't think i was sensitive and that it didn't hurt me just as much???) hmm... also my brother is smarter than i am. i don't think that's why she loves him more, but he knew how to act to keep her happy and not upset her. i never have figured it out to this day. i'm also thinking maybe he's just as manipulative as she is. me, i'm so gullible and just always wanted to be able to trust her and just kept letting her hurt me for so long before i finally started standing up for myself and not taking it any longer. i don't know what to tell you, but i do hope you find a way to deal with it.

Answer 7

im 1 or 3 and i used to think the same thing, like wtf y cant she do that for me etc....until i read the book "Child Called It" after reading that book even if my mom was the being totally unfair i loved her for it!!! You should try reading that book, its one of many series alll true too its very moving.

oh and maybe she thinks your more mature and responsible thats why she doesnt wait on you... look at it as a compliment

Answer 8

I am so sorry that all this have happen to you. I don't know what would make a parent do those kind of things to a person that they made.

Answer 9

Honestly, I doubt that you are singled out. You should talk to your mom and find out whats going on.

Answer 10

It could be retaliation, I guess your dad likes you more than the other siblings...