Is it bad to have doubt about my boyfriend?

Question

My boyfriend had plenty of girlfriends in the past..(especially in a years time).. He says he wants to be honest with me and so he told me all the stories of his ex-girlfriends.. I know i needed to know all that.. but it makes me scared.. He calls me his first love. And he is mine.. But is it natural to have doubt..? To think that he could want something else of me.. or get tired of this close relationship.. I just really want to know how to get rid of this awful feeling.. I don't want to doubt him.. How do i get over it?..

Answer 1

You cant live in his past for the simple fact that you were not with him. On the other hand its good to be honest in your relationship and if you guys are open and honest it should only make you feel closer RIGHT? Also don't dwell on people from his Past theres a reason they didn't make it to his future!!!!! Keep focusing on the good and try not to spend time focusing on the negative. Don't let your mind wonder try thinking of other things when you start having those thoughts like something that makes you laugh that he does and you'll stop eventually. Can you tell I've been through this?! LOL

Answer 2

To be honest, I have that same feeling sometimes with my husband, he's got a good list of ex gfs....and even though I'm friends with most of them there are days when I just wonder....this is totally normal. I doubt my hubby sometimes too but I know that if he didn't want to be where he was he wouldn't be. Plus, I know that if I have questions about things that he will be honest with me completely about whatever the matter is....and if your bf is willing to be honest with you then there's really no more reason to doubt....it DOES take time to get over the doubt, let me tell ya, but not carrying it around and knowing that if he tells you that he loves you and that you're his first love, well, hun, I wouldn't doubt him much unless he gives you reason to....believe me, I would know....

Answer 3

It is good to have those doubts for a while because of all the past girl friends and the fact he told you about them. He may be trying to be honest but he may also be trying to let you know how lucky you are to have him, and if you have sex with this guy you may be one of the ex girl friends he tells the next girl about. Just take everything very slow and don't get rushed into anything for a while yet.

Answer 4

I can only speak for myself but I think that all women have doubts about their men. It could just be that you are a little insecure and that you love him so much that you are afraid of getting hurt. I think it's normal and my doubts with my husband never go away and I don't think that they ever will. Whatever you do, don't keep treating the guy like you can't trust him because that really scares them off and makes them angry especially if they are good men.

Answer 5

Its completly natural to feel doubts about your boyfriend/girlfriend. Its natural instincts. If you do notice he is flirtaous and crosses the line of things. Then its time to start worrying, and sitting down and talking to face to face, whats going on. Its sometimes good in a way to date an experienced guy. He will be more mature about things and can handle a relationship better than a novice. Another big tip here, Don't think about it, the more you think about it the more you attract it. Focus on the great things you guys, have and more of that good will come. I promise you. Good luck to both fo you.

Answer 6

Why on earth did he tell you all the gory details of his ex's? Duh! You don't do that, precisely for this reason. I have to assume he's very young and just doesn't know any better, but it's best to leave the past in the past. There's no reason you "needed" to know all that. Pfft!

So, now you're in an awful position. You're wondering. You're replaying all these stories. Tell him you don't want to hear any more stories-- they don't make you feel good and they have no relevence on your relationship now. Then, try to forget whatever you've heard and know that all that matters is the present.

Answer 7

You are obviously going with your gut instinct...but wait! Sometimes it is bad to hear about past relationships that your ex had because it puts a lot of stress on you! It gives you a reason to feel insecure, especially if he told you anything deceitful he had done to anyone......so really, you need to keep listening to your gut and figure out if there is more to your feelings than just that!!! I sucks to feel this way, I know! I went throught it for 6 months.....

Answer 8

I know you and he want to be honest with each other. I don't think you feel that he is giving you enough details about his past girlriends. Guess what? LET IT GO. That is his past. You also need to build up your own self esteem. Be confident of who you are. I am glad you two are honest with each other. Thats the first step. I think you are waiting for the bottom to drop out. I wonder, who in your life ,created the insecurity, at one point in time.

Answer 9

LOok your always going to have doubts about him especially since of his past but the one thing you have to remember is that you can't let that get in your way. You have to give him a chance and see what happens but has soon has it turns sour you get out of there cuz even if he says that he'll never do it again he will.

Answer 10

Given enough time and continued honesty, you will be fine with the past. It is perfectly natural to feel as you do but don't let your fear interrupt or jeopardize what you have with him. On the other hand, if you smell a rat...there's usually one around somewhere! It always pays to keep a watchful eye in silence. Good luck!