validate all of your shortcomings so you won't have to make any effort to change or grow?
2007-10-19 14:03:21 · 10 answers · asked by MOL 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Interesting question. I do agree to some extent with the person that said friends are friends and that we are responsible for our own growth. However, I do think that we make conscious decisions to befriend people that can help us accomplish a goal.
I would say that some of my friends are in my life to help me be a better person...these are the ones that I sought out because they have something I need. For example, when I decided to start working out, I formed friendships with others that also worked out and had more experience doing so. I knew that I needed their help to learn and to stay motivated.
By the same token, some of my friends are in my life so I can help THEM become a better person. They sought me out because I have something that they need. For example, I have a few friends that admire my spiritual maturity in certain areas. They seek my advice to help them achieve something that is important to them.
...and if I'm honest, I sometimes I allow both groups to validate my own bad habits. For example, I've been trying to quit smoking. Some of my friends have been getting on my case about smoking and trying to motivate me to make this change...but some of my friends are smokers and they are, consciously or subconsciously, influencing me to accept my weakness in this area! When I'm feeling good about a success (e.g., quitting for a week), I seek out validation from the anti-smoking friends...but when I fall off the wagon, I tend to get together with the ones that are still smoking so they can tell me about their failures so I'll feel better about my own!
...as I said, interesting question...made me think about this whole quitting smoking thing in a new way...thanks!
2007-10-19 14:24:54 · answer #1 · answered by KAL 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are put in your life for many different reasons and only God knows what they will teach you or what you will teach them or maybe you won't teach each other a thing, maybe you'll just be friends that have no reason at all to be friends. I think we are here to do what is required of us and people are here to teach or cause us to learn or whatever what we are here for. I know I learn from people and I help people and I don't expect anything from anyone. I am harder on myself than anyone else is and God is such a joker. Maybe this is just a joke, who really has all the answers? Not me.
2007-10-19 14:14:44 · answer #2 · answered by MISS-MARY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friends validate my desire to change and grow.
2007-10-19 14:07:42 · answer #3 · answered by punch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends are just friends. Responsibility for what sort of person you are belongs to you, alone
2007-10-19 14:07:41 · answer #4 · answered by Jack P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Freinds tend to be people who need to relieve their psychobabble onto you and ease their burden. So you're pretty much screwed...
2007-10-19 14:07:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They help me grow.
2007-10-19 14:07:11 · answer #6 · answered by batgirl2good 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friends are my friends for many reasons.
2007-10-19 14:08:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They understand who I really am & I love them
2007-10-19 14:09:53 · answer #8 · answered by Screamin' Banshee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no no no not in any way at all, only you can make yourself better or worse
2007-10-19 14:16:09 · answer #9 · answered by soboetbate 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a little bit of both.
2007-10-19 14:18:46 · answer #10 · answered by Lunachit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋