Im going to my cousins wedding tommorow. I was basically forced into it, due to the guilt trip by all my family members. I am a single mom, and i work a LOT...we get by just fine, but i dont have a lot of extra money. I got her a card, and examined my budget to see what i can afford to give her...and thats 20 bucks. Is it like a slap in the face to get 20 bucks as a wedding gift? Should i give it, or give just the card? She isnt expecting much from me, as that was one of the conditions when i reluctantly agreed to go to the wedding...i just dont want to be rude...which would be better? Both me and my son are attending, so its for 2 people.
2007-10-19 12:35:30 · 28 answers · asked by Jessica 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
make it a gift certificate - it's what you can afford, so include it - it is the THOUGHT that counts
2007-10-20 05:23:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Don't feel guilt about what you have to give and not go to the wedding. She invited you to share the day with her not for the gift!!! What if instead of giving her cash you get her a gift card for where ever she registered for gifts? It is very kind of you to offer what you can afford and I'm sure she would be more than greatful if you just showed up to see her on her special day.
But giving cash is good too, you could always get a seperate card from your son and put that in there.
Have fun and enjoy yourselves!
2007-10-19 20:47:05 · answer #2 · answered by Sunshine 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say get the card and still take a trip to the dollar store or some other cheaper store and get them a nice gift. Maybe a picture frame they can put pictures of them and their kids in or something. I mean it may not be the most expensive gift there is. But that way they can both use it and look and cherish their memories more or something.
P.S.The bath and body works gift certifcate doesn't sound like a bad idea either, as the first part of marriage can be a bit stressful. Though the new hubby might thing its a personal gift just for the wife and not something he can partake in.
2007-10-19 19:45:33 · answer #3 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hi Jessie:
You know what??? I live in a VERY rural area in Michigan and that amount ($20) is pretty much what EVERYONE here gives. I know in other areas people would think that's really cheap, but it's pretty standard here....again, I live in a very rural area where everything (including weddings) can be lots cheaper.
That said.....you give her what you can afford. Since she is a relative, obviously she knows your financial situation. And the fact of the matter is.....really you don't HAVE to give anything. Most people want to give a gift and/or a card with money, but it is not expected....so I would give her the card and the $20 and HAVE FUN!!
2007-10-19 19:48:50 · answer #4 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Instead of giving her the $20 bucks use it to buy her a nice bath set, or a set of dinner plates or glasses or even candle sticks that are elegant you can get a lot of nice gifts for that price. and it would be much better because at lease you took the time to pick something out and not just giving money, a gift is more personal it shows that you care.
so try that with the card if you live near wal-mart or felines basement.
or even target you can find really nice stuff, and don't sweat it it is what you have and as long as it is coming from your heart what more can they ask for.
good luck
2007-10-19 20:42:00 · answer #5 · answered by fancy4not 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why not just buy her a nice gift that is worth $20. You can find some really nice crystal bowls or picture frames etc that she might like. People understand that not everyone has a lot of extra money for gifts. It is the thought that counts. I'm sure she would like to have you there even if you dont give her something expensive.
2007-10-19 19:44:42 · answer #6 · answered by Diane M 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Really I think either way is fine because they are not expecting a gift from you, they only want the gift of your presence. However if you feel you must give, 20 bucks is certainly not a slap in the face. It is generous especially given your circumstance at the moment. (You might also consider a gift card worth 20 bucks to Target or something.)
2007-10-20 07:59:31 · answer #7 · answered by fizzy stuff 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Your family guilted you in to going, which means they want you there! Not your present, yourself!
Don't give her 20 bucks. You could give her a thoughtful $20 present (not a giftcard) but you don't have time to shop before tomorrow.
Go to the wedding with your son & have a great time with your family. Then take your money and buy something perfect (after all, a $20 bar of soap is a luxury, a $20 microwave is a piece of junk), and send it to her new home after the honeymoon.
2007-10-19 19:51:53 · answer #8 · answered by noname 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Either put the $20 in a card, or if you have time get them a pictue frame, bottle of wine, or something like that. I see nothing wrong with giving only what you can afford. They want YOU there not your gift.
Just go and try to enjoy yourself.
2007-10-19 20:24:31 · answer #9 · answered by Asked and Answered 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If thats all you can afford then just do that. Shes your cousin so she should know your situtation. I wouldn't be offended by only getting $20 from a single mom. It will be just fine. Its the thought that counts not how much you give.
2007-10-23 19:41:19 · answer #10 · answered by wmk716 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not a slap in the face. it is the thought that counts. Why not get her a frame or a gift card. I am sure she would rather have you attend the wedding and if you can't get a gift that is fine.
2007-10-19 19:45:05 · answer #11 · answered by ADG 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋