Bulimia or anorexia? How do I choose the lesser of two evils?

Question

I would like some practical advice without the preaching or judgment that normally arise with this topic. I have serious issues with food which I am actively trying to overcome. The problem is I swing violently between not eating at all and being super thin to eating moderate amounts of generally healthy food but finding myself compelled,(and I do), to throw up and being a healthy but still slim size. I feel so torn and confused, I am trying to get better but when I do start to eat well and start to put on weight,I panic and become severely bulimic. My mental state is frazzled and jittery when I am in that phase. I am severely stressed and anxious and the self loathing is immeasurable. However when I don't eat it eliminates all the internal stress because I just don't think at all about food. I feel better with the anorexia, my weight issues are easier,(because I know I'm slim), I just feel more stable and I'm no where near as anxious. I also have bipolar, what do I do?????????????????

Answer 1

Physically bulimia has worse effects on you and will wreck your body before anorexia does.

If you have to choose, I would choose anorexia.
Start out slow, gradually increase your calories day by day. If you take it very slowly you should be able to increase the amount you eat with minimal stress.

Make sure you exercise. I'm not talking about cardio, just something gentle like yoga to keep your muscles strong and your bones healthy if you are not eating properly. If it is weight gain you are worried about, maybe you can manage this by exercising and eating more.

If you can put little reminders around your house that might also help.

Please seek professional help, if you haven't already. You don't have to live with this forever. There is help out there.

If you sink back into bulimia, it might be useful to have someone you can be totally honest with. Call them and say "I feel like purging." They might be able to reason with you whilst you are in the anxious state. If there's nobody you can call, could you find an online support?

Good luck

Answer 2

I think what you need to do is pick a weight you know is healthy. Then give yourself 5 lbs eather way that you are allowed to be and eat acordingly. Live by the scale. Do not have mirrors that you can see your body in as at this point you cant handle that visual. Then go with eating less bulimia is even worse for you than anorexia it does the same things to your body but adds even more bad stuff like ulsers in your esofigus and rotted teeth.

Answer 3

I have had both disorders myself for at lest 8 years of my life. They are both learned behaviors that take a life of their own , and eventually control every aspect of your life.
You will need to decide to get better and do hard work getting there. But, if you are still not ready to stop with the ED. Then no treatment program or anything will help you. When you are ready to stop all of the ED behaviors then it is possible to get into a ED treatment program, learn new ways of eating, and therapy.
By the way, here is the "preaching" Your teeth will never be the same again.... Be ready for them to start abscessing and falling out of your mouth. That is the reality of vomiting.
I still have thousands of dollars left and painful dental visits for what is left of my teeth.
Oh, and do be prepared that the thinner you get people are going to think that you are very ill.... It was not fun when others thought I had AIDS, or TB. It is not attractive either, and it hurts when people come up and say....with a an appalling look "ooooohh your soooo skinny" it is not as glam-ours as you think, and it will cause you to die .
Unless, you decide to start to take care of yourself .

Answer 4

I wouldn't go with either. Both have detrimental effects. I recently knew a 19 year old girl who died from complications of anorexia-her body just shut down and she had seizures and died. Bulimia can cause GI bleeding from persistent vomiting, and the stomach acids can literally rot your teeth completely out, causing a lot of painful dental work.
Do you think you can just choose an ideal weight and try to maintain it, not going over or under five pounds? This may be easier for you, and not nearly as hard on your system.
I hope this helps-I'm not judging you, just concerned because I've seen the effects of both and both are incredibly difficult to treat. Hugs and caring to you.

Answer 5

Well the definition of Bulimia is that you binge eat and then purge. People with bulimia will goes weeks without eating and then eat everything they can. You sound to me like you are anorexic not bulimic because you don't binge eat. Also people with bulimia have bad breath because of the throwing up. Keep in mind though that when you are anorexic your body burns muscle first and then fat. So even though you are slim looking you have a higher body fat percentage. :) Good Luck. :)

Answer 6

Both are equally evil dear. Try this... you seem to like playing tricks on your mind....Eat healthy but eat exactly half of what you WANT to eat. If you weigh more then EXERCISE and weigh yourself again. And wear clothes that are a size or two too big thereby getting the skinny feeling without the painful and deadly side effects of your other choices.

Answer 7

Anorexia is better to deal with, and in all actuality, bulemia actually doesn't help you lose quite as much, because the body thinks that it's digested the food, even if it doesn't. They did a test on people who a.) tasted cream cheese and b.) swallowed it, and it was almost exactly the same -- they gained about the same amount of weight.

However, cream cheese is really bad for you. haha.


Go with anorexia!

Answer 8

I'm sorry you have to go through this. My opinion without judgment, is for you to go get some help. This is a major problem, and it could lead to fatal results in the future. You'll need a rehab center that specializes in this so that they can help you, help yourself in changing your habits all around this area. This way, you can lead a healthier life, with more positive thinking, and self esteem. :-)
Take care.

Answer 9

There is no lesser of the two evils; you need psychological help. BUT.... When you are anorexic do you eat anything? Because if you could at least eat enough to keep yourself functioning then that would be better than throwing up, even if you are too skinny. Please get yourself some help; it is not easy and not cheap but your life is worth it.

Answer 10

when you enter the phase of eating well, you need to make a diet chart.. have a well balanced diet.. avoid high calorie items like potato chips, cheese, butter, non-veg items, bakery items etc etc. make a list of low calorie items and eat them alone.. that way you wont put on weight.. & u ll stay mentally & physically stable.. though it's a psychiatric condition, you may find my answer helpful in some way..

good luck & take care..