Mothers do you prefer to stay at home with your kiddos or do you like to work?

Question

I prefer to work but staying at home with the kids works best for our family. Paying daycare for our 2 babies would swallow my entire paycheck. and working a shift opposite of my husband so we don't need a sister or day care would be (was) a disaster, I worked for about 6 months before the babies were born & it was really bad. My husband has no house-spouse skills. I use to come home from 8-10 hour day & have a full days house work to do. So we decided that for now I'm more needed at home. Yeah, I get greif about it from some but they don't know what it's like for 5 kids to not have their mother home & a husband who doesn't know how to operate any applance in the house other than the television & stove. I work very hard as a stay at home mom, I never get weekends or holidays off, & I'm on call 24/7.

Oh, I'm so sorry, did I sound like I was complaining? That's the funny thing about text ~ it doesn't come with a tone of voice or show emotion. I snicker at the fact that my husband needs me so much & that most SAHM's get ridiculed for "doing nothing all day" when all I ever do is something all day ~ minus the 2 hours when the babies are down for their naps, Nope, no complaints here I just miss working but know I'm needed at home more so I was looking for input on how others handle the decision.

Answer 1

My daughter is now 3 and I work 3 days a week. I loved staying home with her but I have to admit it was a lot harder to stay home all the time with her than to work part time. I am only going to start working 5 days a week when she goes to school. For me it is the perfect balance and luckily enough I have a job that is flexible and I can bring her with me if I need to. I think all stay at home moms have the HARDEST job in the world!

Answer 2

I do both and L-O-V-E both! For the last year and in Jan (I had a daughter in Aug) I teach kindergarten from 9-12. Mys 3yr son and my daughter will be with a sitter for those hours and ADORE her. My other two sons, who are 7 and 9 are in school. When my older two were little, I taught full day, grades 2, 3 or 4.
I love teaching and it is a much easier job to handle compared to some others when you have kids at home as well. Getting home around 12:30 allows me to also still do the mom thing, take care of the kids, the house, make dinner etc.
My husband makes a very decent salery and we really don't need mine, but I work to give us an extra boast and because I love it. I get grief about it ALL THE TIME.
"Why do you work if you don't need to?"
"Why did you have kids if you're just going to work?"
"You're self centered."
Please. 3hrs a day isn't going to make an impact. The baby will be sleeping two of those and my 3yr son is in school 3/5 of those days. I'm not leaving someone else to raise them. I just don't quite understand why I should completely 100% give up my career because I have children. I can do both and I enjoy doing it too.
Best Wishes =]

Answer 3

I like staying home. My son is 13mo and I've been home with him since he was born. I do work some part time evenings a week and when I'm working he's with his dad. We couldn't afford daycare even if I was working full time but it wasn't really about that, it's the fact that we didn't want him in someone else's care. I'm now going to enroll him into a age appropriate program after the 1st of the year 2 part time days a week. I feel he need's the exposure to being around other kid's, doing activitie's and learning. I have no family or friend's around me and I've actually only been away from my son a few times just for a couple of hours in his whole life.

I think he will benefit from this program and so will I. I love the fact that I have been home with him all this time and it will be hard for me to put him into this program but I know it's the best for him. I want him to be able to experience things that I can't provide in my home or simply going to the park. I want him to get excited about going and seeing some new face's.

My husband is great as well, he will do things around the house when I'm gone because he feels he should be doing something when I'm away. He cooks sometimes and never complains to me if I slack a little.

Anyway, I feel so bonded to my son and I love the age he is now! He is so loving and fun. I'm glad that I've always been here for him and I've experienced everything with him. It makes me feel good that he knows as well that we both as his parent's have been here for him everytime he needed something. I look forward to all the new things to come!

Answer 4

Sometimes being a SAHM can be a thankless job and other times it is a blessing in disguise.
There are good days, great days and even some bad days.
Honestly, I prefer to stay home with my children...even though my husband and I sacrifice a lot so that I can.
What you can do to make yourself feel more productive is start working towards a degree online. The schooling you do will not only benefit your self esteem and confidence, but when you do decide or have the chance to go back into the work force....you will be more prepared then you were before.

Answer 5

I have 5 kids (ages 6, 4, and 3 mo old triplets), and it's really tough because I'm in the middle of a divorce.

I used to stay home when my husband and I were still together, but about a month ago we filed and I moved back into my parents' house with my kids. I finally went back to my old profession, journalism, and I work from home.

Working from home is a great 'in-betweenie' to working and taking care of a family, my mom helps out a lot with the babies, too.

Answer 6

I'm very lucky in that I have a job in a school around the corner from my house, so I get to be at home whenever I am needed.

It's not very well paid, but gives me a little bit of money to feel ever so slightly independent!

My son is nearly 7, and up to when he started school I had a very well paid job in the City of London. I don't miss it at all and feel honoured and grateful that I am able to be at home for my family, as well as have a bit of time on my own and go to work.

My other half doesn't do ANY housework, but that's probably my fault after 15 years of doing it all, and stopping him doing it if he ever tried because he wasn't doing it "properly". How I coped with a City job, a baby and running a home, I still don't know (I'm still struggling now, without the job!) and I take my hat off to you!!! I think you will probably find it easier once your children start full-time school, although finding jobs that will fit in with school times is hard - I suggest you get straight in with the PTA as soon as they start, as that is how I got mine!

(PS. Even with a really good job and ONE child, travel and decent daycare took up well over a third of my salary.... )

Answer 7

I have chosen to work part time opposite shifts from my husband. It gets me out of the house a few days a week and also allows me to be w/ my kids more, and I help financially. If they were not in school I would stay home though. My check pays the utilities and his pays the mortgage. It works well for us.

Answer 8

I prefer to work- I am now a single parent and I have no other choice but when I was with his father it was still my option hands down. You are in a different situation with 2 kids. I just really enjoy my independence and earnings. Makes me feel a bit more powerful in the house vs beconing down to the bread winner.

A friend of mine who prefferred to stay home but couldnt ended up getting a job at a Kindercare so she could still always be with the kids while earning a paycheck. She has been there for 3 years now and both of her kids still go in the AM & PM but are in elementry school from 9-4:)

Answer 9

I prefer to stay home.

Families need to do what is best for the entire family, though.

I only have 1 son so far and 1 on the way...Though my husband hates the tight budget we are always on he is really happy to have me home raising our child(ren) than someone else.

We do sacrifice to have me ba able to stay home, but I think regardless of whether you have 1 income or two there are always sacrifices to be made...It is more a matter of priority. For me the priority was to be home, even if that meant cutting our income by 1/3...and being the one who instills lifes values and lessons in my child(ren) not a day care provider or other family member...I wouldn't want it any other way...But like I said you have to do what is best for the entire family!

Answer 10

I think staying at home is wonderful if that's what works for your family and if working works for your family then that's great too.

However, I think the kids of working moms have a few advantages. For one, they learn independence. They learn that mom and dad will not always be around and so they learn how to cope. These are very important skills for kids to learn before they go off to school.

Working moms also have an advantage because they have time to themselves (even though they are working still) but their work is sort of "their thing". Stay at home moms really don't have much that is just theirs because they spend all day with the kids.

Also, I don't see the point of being a stay at home mom once the kids go off to school. If your kids aren't at home, there's really no reason for you to be either but that's just my opinion.

Anyway, I agree with both as long as it works for your family. I myself prefer to work.