What can i do to stop my mother from screaming at me?

Question

she keeps yelling at me.....i ignore her and do whatever she tells me to do. what can i do that helps me keep my mind off these things. (muslims may answer too, i believe that all the islamic answers may help)

Answer 1

Don't ignore her!

Answer 2

Have you told her to stop yelling at you? How old are you? If you are young, maybe you can call an adult and ask them to talk to your mom or be there while you talk to your mom. Maybe her momma was the same way and doesn't realize it. If you are a bit older and willing to do it...start yelling at her, too! Make it a point for her to see what it's like dealing with her. OR record her...I recorded my mom one time to show her just how much she did a certain thing and once it was proven it changed significantly. Good luck!

Answer 3

Maybe she's yelling because you're "ignoring". In my experience, Moms yell when they feel they aren't being heard. Have you tried looking her in the eye when she is speaking to you, or are you seemingly distracted and/or looking as if you're not paying attention? Have you tried (during a calm moment) telling her that her yelling bothers you? Maybe she feels there's a distance between you & that she must yell to "reach" you. Maybe a nice, quiet chat between just the two of you would help smooth things over.
Hope this helps...good luck!

Answer 4

You know, a lot of people do not realize they are yelling when they are. You have to "Modify Her Behavior" if you want her to stop. You do this a couple of ways...(And this really works. I did this to an old nasty boss who loved to yell, and it really stopped him in his tracks.)

The first thing you need to understand about behaviour modification is that people want you to agree with them. If you don't, they will change their behavior to enforce agreement.

1) Everytime she begins yelling at you, frown and shake your head like you are disagreeing with her. She will try to change what she is doing to get you to nod and smile.

2) When she does talk to you the way you want to be talked too, give her your full attention, smile and nod. That is what she really wants.

3) If the yelling continues, raise your voice to match hers. It should catch her a bit by surprise and she will ask why you are yelling. You can tell her you are just talking to her the way she is talking to you.

4) Excuse yourself and walk away. Tell her you will be right back, then come back a couple minutes later. It's highly likely that she will have forgotten what she was yelling at you for.

5) Reward the behavior you want her to have with things she likes...I used to bring my boss a cup of coffee when he would stay in his office. It helped keep him in there, and it appealed to his "manly" need to be served by a female.

Lastly, if she's yelling at you, she wants you to do something...it's a reward she's looking for. Don't do the work because she's yelling...Instead, confirm what she wants in a calm and quiet voice, then let her know exactly when you will be able to comply.

Oh, and you have to keep this up for at least thirty days. It takes three weeks for a new habit to be formed. If you are not consistent, it will not take hold.

Hope this helps.

Answer 5

If she's not listening to your voice, maybe sit down and write a letter explaining how you feel? Don't use "you" messages like "you always do this, you always scream...." Instead say things like, "I feel like crying because we don't communicate well, I feel like I am misunderstood by you, I feel like I want to talk with you but it's hard to....."

Good luck, some mom's are extreme and have never learned how to control their tempers. You just may be able plant the seed.

Answer 6

Hi.

your mother has some issues, if she believes screaming solves problems or makes people do things.

you could ask your mom to talk, and ask her what you can do to help her stop screaming so much.... let her know how you feel when she screams --- i feel scared, i feel put down... or however you feel.

maybe she doesn't realize she's screaming? who knows?

some people are angry and instead of dealing with their problems, they take it out on others. it's not fair, at all.

Answer 7

Speak calmly to her, whatever she does. Keep your voice and tone calm. Be reasonable, even when she isn't. Don't argue. Understand that most of her stress has nothing to do with you. When she is calm, talk to her about her screaming and ask her to speak to you more reasonably. Be patient. She loves you.

Answer 8

i have the same prob my mum is LAUD and when she wants something done she wants it done yesterday but as i got older i really hated this so what i used to do is hide in my room and eat eat eat but then one day a friend said to me deal with it so i did i spoke to her and told her that this will break me for the rest of my life so plz plz understand and am still trying but i think she is trying and i can wait so u do the same i know u love Ur mother but this is how u r so go and DEAL WITH IT

Answer 9

i think the fact that you don't acknowledge what she's saying makes her even more angry. if you could talk to her face to face in a calm manner that would probably help things. mothers usually just want to know what is going on with their kids lives. sometimes i wish i could go back and form a stronger relationship with my mother.

Answer 10

Exactly - ignoring her is probably pissing her off more -- sit down and talk to her. Tell her it's really hurting you. She may not even realize she's doing it as much as she is.

Answer 11

I dont think there is a way to make her stop.
you could talk to her..and tell her that you dont like it when she yells at you..
but i dont think you should ignore her either..that might be just making her more mad..
and thats not what you want.
i dont think..