are white women scared to date blacks?

Question

quick info on me, 24 yrs old, drive mercedes clk 430, supervisor for landscape company and attend night school as auto mechanic. So future is looking good. I doubt that info is the problem but jus wanted to say it just in case. Here we go. I am black and have no problems with blk women as friend or relationship wise. But it seems whenever i flirt, go clubbing, try to start convo with white females, they go beserk. They give me a look like are you kidding, how dare you try to advance on me, or even dare be near me, and i'm like whoa calm down shorty. Its not that serious. Even casual convo, or in a bank line waiting to deposit your check, I always feel this hidden tension. Lately i have noticed its been easier to talk to a little more unattractive white women, but when it comes to the blonde and gorgeous brown hair (paris hilton) & (jessica alba)example.. I still get the that treatment like go away, your not worth me, and i'm like, you should be lucky i even gave you attention.

Answer 1

I've got news for you: the vast majority of white guys don't have any better luck with the Paris Hilton types. If looks are your primary criteria, be prepared to get shot down a lot unless you start talking loudly about your car.

Answer 2

In my younger, prettier days, I had a number of long-lasting relationships with some awfully hot black men - and even today, although heavier and not nearly as pretty, there are some pretty doggoned hot mature black men who would like to be by my side, still.

So, from a mature white woman's perspective, listen, please.

First of all, your race doesn't really have much to do with it. It's the message you're sending out - that you're superficial and shallow that turns women (of any race, btw) off. Whether or not that's the intention, that's what you're telling these girls. Hey, look at me! I'm a self-absorbed jerk who wants to nail your white @55 to the bed. Ain't I cool!

First of all, she's heard all that before - turns her stomach, too.

Trust me. No attractive woman of any race wants that kind of man in her life - to high maintenance for so little reward.

So how DO you get to meet up with Dianna Gorgous? Remember - she's surrounded by thousands of self-absorbed jerks who want to nail her white @55 to the bed. She's heard every line, she knows every subtle body-message. She's wearing armor, baby. And she can see right through all that and is pretty sick of it.

Well, how about speaking with her as if she mattered as a person? This takes research. Find out more about her as a person - a woman - a human being. You know, her interests, hobbies, preferences etc. etc.? Yeah, that stuff. I mean, there's more to life than a Knicks/Bulls game... Then you can pique her interests because you actually RESPECT her - as a peer - rather than as a conquest.

This takes swallowing a whole lot of your "macho" image as Mr. Stud with his Mercedes clk 430 etc. etc. and maybe, just maybe opening up with something out of the blue - You know, I see you here a lot. And it just dawned on me that I bet you have interests that are so way-beyond what any of these people here could even comprehend. How about I buy you a drink and maybe you'll be kind enough to share some of what's really on your mind.

THEN - and this is the clincher - listen to her. Don't mention how much you want to get "closer" to her at all. Just let her talk. Ask her intelligent questions - to keep her interests (you've done your research so you can actually understand what she's talking about, right?)

Bet she's NEVER been treated like that before. AND don't be surprised if you keep talking until 4:00 a.m.

Bet she gives you her number - if not a little more...

Answer 3

I wouldnt say were scared.. in my experience.. i find a lot of black guys hot.. but some can come across as over confident and cocky... which is s huge turn off.

And this is not in anyway saying all black guys are like this.. it may just be were some are from.. but if i cant understand the guy no matter what colour ..im not interested in talking. I find some either use too much slang.. which i guess i dont understand, or they mumble way too much.. or the accent can b a barrier

Answer 4

I hate to say this but it is the stereotype that black males just are after sex or they are on their way to prison. Also, sometimes women freak out when any guy starts talking to them out of the blue. We sometimes feel like victims for prey. White guys usually don't hit on you in a bank line. Black guys tend to be more forward, and it can take you off guard.

Remember women have been taught to not trust most men. You would have an easier time talking to women on more neutral ground, say out with a bunch of friends, or in class.

Answer 5

I am not scared to date a black man, and I'm not really sure about all white women, but it sounds to me that "paris" and "jessica" girls are too stuck up! That they arent going to settle for anything less than Denzel Washington and you dont need those girls! They have their head so far up their own butt to even see how nice of a guy you can be! And the "less unattractive" girls are probably REALLY nice and are REAL and I guarentee that the more you know them the hotter they will get ;) GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

Let me make this easy for you. My first instinct would be a racist thing. My second instinct would be that black men looks like a big risk to white woman. They already label black men to gangs and guns or unless they are afraid of the tools black man come with ;). All in all honey, white girls aint worth it, I'm not saying to stop approaching them but always look at their facial expression when they see you. If the look is inviting then you know she is interested. Good luck.

Answer 7

Its not that you're not good enough or anything disrespectful its because most of the blacks who hit on me try to use me as a show piece & not normal,they want to go out of their way to be seen as much as possible.Especially by other blacks.O J Simpson is a prime example of this he want to be in the lime light when he would be better off just to cool it & act normal but no he wants the attention saying"hey everybody i'm having a party" but hes the only one attending.I hope this helps.Most white people have nothing agasint black people because of color but its mainly their attitude & not color.Lets face it less than 1% of white folks had slaves & remember the white people are here because they were treated awful in europe.So both black & whites are better off here than in the homeland where both our ancestors treated us horrible & in africa its still happening.So grab hold and come on along with us sounds like you are on your way. Good luck

Answer 8

Hey bro good for you.. but unfortunately.. the other black males have set a reputation for the black males. How they would go after anything with a hole pretty much.. how many babys momma's they have laying around.. etc etc.. Race no matter what will always come into play in EVERYTHING. Good luck to you

Answer 9

I dont really agree with sara lol. To me it doesnt matter what your skin color is it's the attraction to you is it there or not. Is there a good conversation going. Do I like this person.I've actually found that black men have more of an issue with black's dating whites than most girls I know, but since you dont that's awesome. I think it just depends on the girl. I know girls of all different races who won't date outside of their race for whatever reason. I think it's silly but.. we all have our preferences I guess.

Answer 10

Hahahahaha, these questions are crackin' me up. Ok, firstly, no, they're not scared of you. I think it's pretty arrogant of you to think that, ever consider that they're just no interested? They're just not feelin' you? I went to school in a nearly all-black high school so I have, actually a majority, of black friends. I see it all the time. Let's face it, in general, (it obviously doesn't apply to all, or maybe not even you) the attractive white women know they're just out to "hit it". It also doesn't help that you can't walk through a mall in the United States without seeing skinny black dudes walking around with fat white chicks. Have you ever thought, maybe these hot white girls are just out of your league? In fact, I'm guessing the hot black girls are too, you're just not going to mention that because that would hurt your little arguement. Actually, I'll take that back, I don't believe in the "out of your league" ideology because it's not impossible to get any woman, regardless of her hotness. If the approach is strong, unpredictable, and you say things to make her smile and push aside her near natural cynicism of men... you're in. I know... ;)