Me and my boyfriend used to get along great...until he moved. i guess we still get along, but lately some things have happened. he started doing drugs, and three days into his new school he was expelled. a little while later he tried to kill himself. i dont love him anymore, and i dont see any future with him, but he has actually told me that he would kill himself if he didnt have me, and i believe him. i think the best approach would be for him to break up with me, but i dont think that will ever happen, because he is really obsessive. once i left my phone for an hour, and there were 35 missed calls from just him...no joke. ive had enough of this nonsense, but im scared of how he'll handle it. any ideas what i should do??
2007-10-19 02:12:53 · 11 answers · asked by dramaqueen4x 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honestly and seriously, call the authorities. There are laws in place that can make your bf get treatment for his suicidal threats and actions, that can protect him from himself. This is too much of a burden for you to bear alone -- he is holding you as an emotional hostage and nobody needs that.
I would be willing to bet that you are feeling like a nervous wreck right now, too, since he has basically said that you are responsible for keeping him alive, which it COMPLETELY WRONG and not fair to you. If you care about him in some small way, even though the love is gone, and if you care about taking care of yoruself (which should be your #1 priority after a manipulative situation like the one you are in), then call the authorities now. You can call 911, or the non-emergency police number, a psychiatric helpline, or a psychiatric hospital. Explain your situation and they can direct you to exactly what you need to do.
Even if he tries to make you feel guilty for doing this, do it anyway. It is the real way to show that you care and that you are a good person. Staying tied to him even though he is trying to manipulate you will end up helping no one.
I know this is a rough situation -- I have dealt with loved ones in somewhat similar circumstances. Remember that it is not your responsibility to babysit his whole existence. Take care of yourself and don't blame yourself for having to take action that he might find unpleasant. Good luck!!!!!
2007-10-19 02:28:18 · answer #1 · answered by LN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-08 22:13:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's a tough one. I think the best bet is to get him some help. Tell one of his family members/friends what's going on with him. But don't stay in that relationship. It will only bring you down. I will also change my number... 35 missed calls? That's ridiculous! Anyway, if you don't have any feelings for him and see no future with him, walk away. You don't need to be surrounded by that.
2007-10-19 02:31:03 · answer #3 · answered by misskaytoo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The sooner you're out of this relationship, the better. He's toxic to himself, and is using his threat of suicide to blackmail you into continueing to be his girlfriend. I'de contact his family and tell them you are going to break up with him, and ask that they keep a close eye on him. This type of guy can cause serious trouble, and may even be dangerous to you.
2007-10-19 02:23:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact the police or a suicide line and tell them. It's not up to you to stop him from commiting suicide. He's playing on your emotions to make you stay with him. Someone who makes a statement like "if you break up with me I'll kill myself" is either so twisted and controlling that you need to get away from them or they really ARE suicidal and will attempt it regardless of your actions. The bottom line is it isn't your responsibility.
2007-10-19 02:29:52 · answer #5 · answered by ♪ ♫Jin_Jur♫ ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
his behaviour is classic example of emotional dependency. he depends on you and in order to keep you he uses emotional blackmail (i'll kill myself if your not around). it is nearly always the case that if someone says this they wont actually do it. just like his previous attempt of killing himself that didnt work, it is a cry for help if you want to kill yourself you would succeed.
this level of dependency on you is not what you need you HAVE TO end this relationship for your own mental health. its a sticky situation but i think you can treat this behaviour by turning his own behavuiour on him ....by this i mean you can say to him 'i need you to get phsciatric help if you dont see a shrink i will end it' by the time (if he really is serious about you)
he see this shrink it will address these problems and you can end the relationship .....in the end of the day its HIS problem not your.
you have to use his own behaviour against him it is the only reasoning he will understand
2007-10-19 02:26:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact his parents and let them know what is going on. He needs help that you can not give him. Breaking up with him is your decision do not let him hold you hostage over it. If he tries to kill himself it is his issues in life not yours, try not to let that get to you, it is a mind game and right now he is winning.
2007-10-19 02:22:31 · answer #7 · answered by desiree c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never be scared by any ones threat of committing suicide.Those who are desperate enough to commit suicide never tell others and go ahead with what they have decided.Those who verbally inform ,or even give an indirect hint of suicide, are emotionally exploiting others so that their just/unjust demands are met.Be careful about such blatant liars and protect yourself.Such persons tend to be extremely dramatic.
2007-10-19 02:27:45 · answer #8 · answered by yogeshwargarg 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
try talking to him at first just dont bluntly say that u wanna separate i mean u liked him b4 he started doing drugs rite? so tell him directly that if he wants u , hes gotta get rid of his new behavior which u r not very fond of . put them in front of him tell him if he wants the relationship then he too has to do make effort to get u back not just threaten you. u as an individual too have freedom of choice.
2007-10-19 02:23:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to do things that might turn him off, no really,
maybe if you become clingy he'll run away,
you obviosly have heart, cuz other ex-girlfriends
wouldn't care.God Bless
2007-10-19 02:18:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋