Do I have to drink alcohol to socialize?

Question

I go to college in california, and it seems like everyone is drinking... even shyest girl in my class! I'm 19 and i've never drunk alcohol before. I've never smoked either.

The thing is that I want to make friends, and will people think i'm not cool because I refuse to drink? I'm really into bodybuilding and beer is loaded with calories. Can I still make cool friends and socialize without drinking beers?

And girls... do you find guys who don't drink unattractive?

Answer 1

Of course not..... I'd find a guy who doesn't drink a lot more attractive than one who does, especially if he only drinks to "fit in" or to pretend he's a "grown, mature guy", or to be someone he really isn't (e.g. he becomes funny when he's drunk but is plain boring when he's sober and so he drinks to become someone he really isn't). You have excellent reasons not to drink, and you should be able to hook up with people who think alike..... why would you want to have a bunch of dumb, superficial friends who think they can only have fun by getting soaked in alcohol, anyway!!?? You should find friends with interests similar to yours, and that way you'll all have fun without having to do things you really don't want to do only in order to be accepted. Be strong and keep these good habits going, smoking sucks and it damages your body, and alcohol can also be bad if not controlled properly. So just know that you WILL have a great time if you hang out with the right people and NO, you won't need to drink beer for that to happen!

EDIT: In fact, I just remembered when I got 1-2 drunk guys approach me while at a bar....... I didn't like them at all!!! I hate to talk with someone who isn't really aware of what they're saying and who will not remember you the morning after..... maybe they didn't even like you, they were just trying to hook up with whomever and the alcohol gave them the courage to do so.... I wouldn't want to date a guy like that, you know!!

Answer 2

Let me tell you this. You should never do anything to be cool or liked just because you think others will change how they feel about you. You are right and mature and you are the one who will have a good GPA and won't have to crawl back to mom and dad or whoever and explain why you didn't study because you had a hangover or should I say lie to them! They are exploring and a lot of them come from unstable homes and have the same thoughts that you do...I am cool. Well, it is a lie and they will suffer for it from grades to STD's to sleeping with people they barely or don't know and then deal with all that. You can socialize with another group of people that don't have to drink or whatever to be human. I think you are using your head and the brain that God gave you to make this a question on here. It may help others to see you be straight and the girls that you want to be with aren't the kind that drink too much and do things that are risky...alcohol makes judgment impaired...driving and so many things happen with this legal drug. Hang in there and be a good example, there are enough bad ones out there. Right?

Answer 3

To drink or not to drink . . . that is the question. This is a grandfather speaking - the father of three daughters who as a few years older that you - and grandfather of 11 (count 'em) granddaughters. I have nothing against alcohol as long as it is handled "carefully" and in moderation. At 19 it should not even be an issue except I know about peer pressure and the "everybody else is doing it" philosophy. It doesn't take a drink to make a friend. You CAN make cool friends and have a hecki of a good time without the crutch of alcohol. And, if you avoid alcohol and steer clear of tobacco as well you're living a healthier lifestyle. And, young lady, I think you'll find that a young man who refuses to let beer and tobacco become a controlling factor in his life will be far more attractive and attracted to you. Thanks for asking. Hope my answer helps.

Answer 4

Have one person get really wasted, and have the others make fun of him. Ask them if they really want to be the drunk idiot at the party. Video tape it, and show the drunk idiot, so he never drinks again either. Of course you don't need alcohol to socialize, but it sure does help a lot. It blocks that part of our brain that holds us back. That thing that makes some of us "chicken" to go out and talk to someone, or that little thing in your head that stops you from going up to a girl/guy you like. They don't call it liquid courage for nothing. All the best activities involve alcohol. Going to bar/clubs, going to sporting events, parties. There's no way to complete get them away from situations that involve alcohol. So you might be able to convince them that they can still have fun without alcohol, but whatever activity they just did, sure would have been funner if alcohol was involved (in there minds at least, I mean, they watch there parents drink. They hear them at night, laughing and giggling with there friends, having a great time..etc). I think you should teach them to drink responsibly, instead of preaching to them that drinking is bad... because a teenager craves attention, and often times, being bad is the way to get it. They're going to drink no matter what you tell them about alcohol. Having a "cool" responsible grownup teach them about responsibility, and responsible drinking will at least teach them not to go overboard and drink half a bottle of vodka, or to not be stupid and go out drinking and driving. Knowing how to drink responsibly is a better way to actually get them to think about what they are doing.

Answer 5

If you feel very uncomfortable, do what I do in a similar situation: Pretend to drink. If in a bar, discreetly order a Coke but tell the bartender to dress it like a Rum and Coke. It'll come in a cocktail glass with a little straw and lime, and if you sip it instead of actually drinking like you would a Coke, people will believe it's alcohol. If you're going to parties where only beer is available, you've already given your reason why you don't drink it; people will understand that one. Of course you are going to get peer pressure to drink; just be strong about it. Drining doesn't make you cool; I remember college drinking and mostly it was idiots stumbling around and barfing all over the place.
And no, I don't find guys unattractive if they don't drink. Some I find unattractive because they drink too much.

Answer 6

NO!!! You do not have to drink to make friends. Stay true to yourself and soon you will have friends who have the same interests as you. And guys who dont drink are very attractive. Imagine being married to an alcoholic, been there, done that, and now im dating a guy who quit drinking a few years ago, and we have great conversations and we both remember them the next day lol. So, the point is, say no to peer pressure and live your life as YOU see fit, not how others say you should :)

Answer 7

I socialize a lot and not drink.

It's not that I never drink but I don't find the need to drink every time I'm in a social setting.

What's unattractive are people who do things because they want to look attractive.

You're under age....you can have fun without drinking and stay out of trouble with the law.....that's what a mature person would do.

Answer 8

You can have a wonderful time and don't have to drink. Just sit back and watch all of those that are drinking, how loud they get, how stupid they act, and loose they become, and listen to others saying bad things about them, and you will be glad that you don't drink. Be yourself you don't have to drink to have fun. The coolest friends are made when you don't have to rely on alcohol to seem cool. From a female perspective, there is nothing sexier than a man who can be himself without the aid of drugs and alcohol. Don't worry about what people think, it matters what YOU think about YOU. Believe it or not people will envy you because you don't drink, yes some will make fun of you and try to make you feel bad because you don't drink, that s because they are jealous and insecure with themselves. I commend you as a young man in college, don't fall into peer pressure, focus on your goals, and look at all of the ones who are drinking now, and see will they be graduating on time with you or will they have dropped out. NEVER LET OTHERS ISSUES BECOME YOUR ISSUES, Good luck in college, God Bless you and make those A's. :)

Answer 9

No, you absolutely do not have to drink to socialize. I've never had a drink in my life, and I have lots of fun with my friends. There are lots of people who don't drink, for lots of reasons. I think that your reasons are completely legitimate.

The best way to avoid the temptation to drink is to stay away from the parties where kids are drinking. Don't worry; there are plenty of activities you can do sober, too.

I definitely find guys who don't drink more attractive than guys who drink. People who are drunk think they're having a lot of fun, but I wonder if it's because they assume they had fun because they don't really remember...

Answer 10

You do not need to drink alcohol to socialize. You also do not need to pick up the habit of smoking just because other people you are with do it. Whether people think you are cool or not is based on your personality not your choice of drink. My friend is not a drinker of alcohol and those who invite him to parties always make sure there is an alternative for him to drink usually his favorite soda or unspiked punch. He has found that by him not drinking alcohol has given other friends the freedom to also not drink at parties if they don't want to.
I actually prefer men who don't drink alcohol. (I am a girl).