Should I put my son on Ritalin? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY?

Question

My son has been having anger and self esteem issues. He's started in a new school and I seperated from the man he came to know as his dad. So he's had some problems recently. His teachers have brought to my attention that hes having major problems focusing and doing his work. My fiance thinks my son needs Ritalin and that it would calm him down enough to concentrate and focus.

I need some opinions on this.... I'm scared of altering his personality, does Ritalin do that? I dont want to be dependent on medication and never be ok without it.

Please give me some input, he doesnt have a pediatrician yet so I don't know who else to ask.

Answer 1

my oldest son (13) isn't on Ritalin he is taking Aderall. he has ADHD for the last 5 years. When he was first diagnosed by his pediatrician i felt like i let hem down as a parent, that he had to be on meds to function day to day. but let me tell you, it has helped him control his anger and his focus in school. Take him to a DR. and let them test him. if he is it will help and dont worry, he wont become a zombie. hope this hepled.

Answer 2

Try to enroll him in a big brother program. That way he can develop a new relationship with a guy and do guy things. He is probably going thru withdraws. Do not put him on Ridlin unless you know that he has autism or something that is serious. People over medicate their children these days. Ridalin is not good for kids. It can cause obesity, and it made my cousin a drone. He was getting great reviews from his teacher (who suggested it). When the mom went to pick him up from school early. (she didnt use the drug at home, only at school) he was sitting in a corner by himself, and not talking to anyone. Come to find out he wasnt talking at all at school anymore. So the teacher was happy cause he was no longer interrupting her. URG...... Just show him some extra love. and really look into some man that will help maintain that type of relationship with him.

But make sure he has not been abused first. Maybe have him talk to a counsleor in school or something.

Answer 3

Jessie,
You say your son does not have a pediatrician yet........why not? He's school, didn't he need to get shots before starting? Sorry, but these were the thoughts that went through my head when I read your question.
I don't know much about Ritalin, but I do know that if too much is taken, you appear to be in outer space, like you stare a lot. You are a very good mom to question this before allowing your child to take a prescription of which he most likely will become dependent on. I don't know if you have health insurance, but if you do, please get more than one opinion. Be patient with your son, maybe he's just been through too much in these young years. Don't jump with the medicine. Could also be the teachers don't have patience, they are not perfect. I know quite a few who are nuts. Good luck! Be cautious!!

Answer 4

It sounds to me more like your son is having some issues with depression, not ADD. You need to have him diagnosed by a trained child therapist, not just a family doctor writing a prescription.

Don't be too concerned though if the psychologist thinks he needs some kind of medication (ritalin) or otherwise. Rarely does a person need medication for these issues their entire life. Also, if your son had a cold, you'd give him cold medicine, right? If he had cancer (G-d forbid) you'd get him chemo...so don't feel leary of giving him NEEDED medication for a mental condition (for lack of a better term.)

Good luck getting to the root of all this and straightening it all out.

Answer 5

Well, since only a doctor can prescribe such a medication, you need to make an appointment with one asap. You should also consider him seeing a psychologist to help him deal with the trauma of loosing a father figure. The doctor will test him and let you know what medications will work for whatever the problem is. He could be depressed and Ritalin will not help that.

Answer 6

1] get a good pediatrician, now, and go see him [ ask for references from friends ].
2] talk to the school counselor, the school social worker, or the school psychiatrist - get a reference for evaluation.
3] it is normal for your son to be greiving the loss of a parent as full time Dad - but you have to help him adjust.
4] since when do 'fiances' diagnose and treat?
Ritalin does not help anger or self esteem, and only helps attention problems if given properly.
Suggestions:
a] does he still see former 'Dad'? If so, have him talk to your son as well, after you brief him.
b] have teacher write down all assignments - homework, and unfinished class work. Give him an hour break when he gets home for snack and play, then tackle assignments.
You initial or sign all completed work in assignment, book, and put in a turn in folder for class.
c] all unfinished work must be dealt with, but in a positive way.
example:
finished all classwork today - great! get an hour with his electronic of choice - TV, computer, video games, music
finished all homework last night, and all classwork - two hours
finishes nothing - no electronics - does work, reads, plays with dogs/kids/parents
d] consider enrolling him in an activity to get rid of aggression, and emphasize control - like martial arts. They would also build his self esteem.
e] be careful and consistent with discipline - don't threaten to do something you will never do, or will make him less easy to handle.

Answer 7

I don't think at this point anyone should recommend medications.did your son have issues with focusing and in his behaviour prior to the move? Did his previous teachers ever have concerns about his efforts at school or his behaviour? Your son has had a lot of issues to deal with in a short period of time.New home,new school, no friends,problems fitting in etc.He also is dealing with the emotional impact of your separation from your ex.If it were me I would talk to him about his feelings and try to really listen to what he is saying.He is angry and confused because his whole world has been turned upside down.Probably some counselling might help him to cope with all the changes.Sometimes it is easier to talk to a stranger .I support the use of medications when truly needed.I am not convinced that it is appropriate in this situation.I urge you to make an appointment with the doctor and his teachers as a starting point in helping your son. I would imagine there is not going to be a quick fix but look into this as soon as you can.Good luck.

Answer 8

Take him to a person to test
He may not have ADAH
I would not put my child on a drug because a teacher and my fiance said so.
Ritalin is a cocaine base drug
I would ask the school to have the boy test
Take to the person they send you
If he does have ADAH
Here are non drug ways of treating it

I would not put my child on drugs, because a teacher said so. My state change the rule, and if a teacher want a child on Ritalin, they much get the doctor check out by a doctor.

Ask the school to get your child tested or give you a list of places to get him tested. If you pay for the test, you do not have to give the school the test, if you pay for it

Good luck

Answer 9

Generation Rx has earned it's name because people are no longer opting to deal with their childs inner battles. The way a child behaves at this point in their lives is a result of a combination of their experiences and their predispositions. Any drug designed to change the way the child naturally behaves becomes a cloak over that particular childs personality. It deals directly with the sympton and not at all with the sickness. The child will move on in his life never having dealt with the core issues that generated this behavior, and one day a few years down the road , lets say, when he's married, all of these things will be forced to rear their ugly heads and most likely destroy his relationships, self discipline and eventually he may turn back to the mask that he turned to as a child when things got ugly, drugs. Should you give your child riddalin when hes angry? I dont know..should you give him marijuana when hes anxious? Should you give him cocaine when he's tired? Should you give him vodka when he is feeling sorry for himself? You have responsibility over another human being. Please don't ruin his chance to find himself just because things get tough. He will get through it, and be a better man because of it. I hope this helps.

Answer 10

You should get your son a pediatrician as soon as possible and ask for their opinion. I would even go for a second opinion after that. Remember that there's no way of knowing if the people on YA have any idea of what they're talking about. Good luck with your son.
I wish you the best.