Emotional or physcial abuse?

Question

Well my dad and my mom have been married for a long time but my dad always has mood swings. My mom has been told, and she also thinks this, that he's bi-polar.

He used to leave when I was little and when I finally saw them fighting my dad left, and I chased his car in the rain (I know sounds cliche huh?) Well i did. I was like 7. Whenever they get into fights they always yell and my dad will sometimes curse at my mom saying she's an *** or w/e. but he doesn't curse a lot.

I always get upset and usually cry when they fight because he likes to have control, and plays mind games.
My mom usually has to ask for money from him and he ALWAYS gets mad. Me and my mom always had to watch what we say because if I say something wrong he can get really mad, and defense. It's been going on for several years.

Is this emotional abuse? (I feel like it is but idk?)

I'm 14, and I'm an only child so I dont like to talk about it with others except my best friend whose a guy.

thanks for your responses too, I mean i dont want to make my dad sound like an insane man because he can be nice and has given me great opportunities but I just need to know this.

Answer 1

In a word, yes.

Answer 2

When one party always has to "walk on eggshells" around the other, that's a classic sign of an abusive relationship.

That doesn't mean your dad is a monster or anything, just that he has some issues that are making life tough for you and your mother. It could very well be that there is some underlying condition (like bipolar) that is causing his behavior.

The mind games and control stuff is seriously not healthy, though. If you're not already talking to someone you trust about this, you should find someone and start. Go to a counselor if you can't find anyone else.

Answer 3

Yes, that is DEFINATELY emotional abuse. My dad does similiar too. I feel for you. Hang in there - soon you will be old enough to take responsibility of yourself and your mom, and won't have to put up with his explosive anger any longer. Play it cool - don't let him see you cry and treat him like he's the child. (because he's acting like one) What I mean is turn the cold shoulder on him. Not so much that he notices right off... but just slowly. Men that try and play mind games crave control - so maybe he had a bad experience with his dad growing up? My grandaddy treated my dad the same as he treats me... but my dad simply didn't learn from his experience! If anything he's worse. Or maybe something several years ago happened that made your dad's anger re-awaken? I honestly hope things get better for you!

Answer 4

Well, I'm only an 12 years old child. Though my mom and dad hasn't fight since before I WAS EVEN BORN! Well my 22 years-old-brother said that parents has they're own feelings. Like sometimes they don't let us do something but we feel like that is non sense. I do not think that's emotional abuse, but I dont think it's right! It's always better if you calm down and talk, that's always they best way. But different people has different personalities, you cna't do anything to it, it's about them. WE can ONLY say something and we never know if it works for them! SO I DONT KNOW!

Answer 5

Parents fighting with each other doesn't really count as abuse. However, his playing "mind games" could qualify, depending on what you mean by mind games.

You should talk with your teacher about this. S/he will be able to look at the specific example and tell you if it qualifies, and your teacher is required by law to report it and get help for you family if it is abuse.

Be safe and assume it is abuse. Your dad's bipolar condition will only get worse, and might eventually cause serious harm to you or your mother.

Answer 6

It's absolutely emotional abuse and even though I wouldn't categorize it as physical abuse, the long-term effects of emotional abuse can impact one's physical health. If you feel that your or your Mom's physical body has been or is being harmed by your Dad being PHYSICALLY ABUSIVE with either of you, then I suggest letting your local law enforcement office know what's going on for your own safety. If it's strictly verbal abuse, let your Mom know how you feel so that she can ask for help for you guys. I wish you the best, keep your chin up kiddo because when you're old enough to move out, you won't have to put up with that anymore. :)

Answer 7

it relatively is too undesirable!! Did you permit him know how lots he's hurting you??? If no longer, you're able to.(you and your brother) and in case you already did, do it lower back.If that would not paintings then bypass tell somebody possibly at college ( I hate to allow you know to try this) because of the fact i think that what occurs at homestead, ought to consistently stay at homestead yet you and your brother ought to experience secure.yet another factor, some adults choose a splash help elevating their little ones, cuz they do no longer know the thank you to do it on their own and that's ok,the dep.. of youngsters and households is going to be sure that the two mom and pa are taking solid care of you,and while they get in contact you mom can no longer grounded you like that for an entire college 3 hundred and sixty 5 days ( no longer for you attempting to experience secure) and it appears that evidently like your dad can use some help controlling his anger too. there is no reason to get actual, and often you do no longer harm those you like (particularly) your little ones. So i'm particular he love you adult males, he's in simple terms having it tough. attempt chatting with him there is no longer something extra effective than communique particularly between people who LOVE one yet another.. solid success sweetie!!

Answer 8

this is not healthy- it is emotional abuse from what you're saying. Your mom should try to get him some help- or they should be in counseling. Try to keep your distance when they fight- and know that unless he wants help- no one can help him- and no one can convince her to get away if she's too scared- she will decide what to do when she's ready.
Brace yourself- and try not to take it too much to heart- just know they fight- and it will blow over eventually- like a cycle. Talk to your school guidance counselor about it- it might make you feel better about things.... remember- you won't live there forever- and while you worry about them- they're grown and will figure out what to do somehow-
if you ever do gain the courage- talk to your mom about it- if she knew this was affecting you- it may help her want to make some changes in her marriage...
good luck to you

Answer 9

It is only emotional abuse (or physical abuse) if the INTENT is to inflict pain.

Watching somebody self destruct, though painful, is not particularly that person being abusive.

Getting mad isn't good ... indeed it may well be reason to leave, but it in itself isn't abuse. Getting mad and yelling isn't even particularly abusive ... but what he says when he's yelling (or even in a quiet monotone) can be very abusive.

Abuse requires the intent to harm.

Answer 10

Yes, it is emotional abuse towards you and your mother. If he is bi polar though, it would be good for him to get personal counseling, and they can prescribe him medication. I recommend counseling for the entire family though, you guys need to talk about this problem in a safe environment, where you can get healing. People think words don't hurt, but they really do, they stick in your head and manifest itself later on. Its never wise to argue in front of your children. I wish you and your family the best .

Answer 11

you young lady already know it is.My girls used to hide under there bed when my husband would fight with me or hit me.they used to pretend they were somewhere other than where they were. talk to somone you trust dont let it go on for it can hurt you later in life.My daughter got married and her husband was mentally abusive to her. you know what her reply was when i would ask her why do you stay.BECAUSE YOU DID MOM! well i can say he hasnt touched me or mentally abused me in a very long time 15 or so years. we went to councling and we both changed.but my daughter is know divorced and fighting his head games still. find help now dont wait and dont do what us mothers do because sometimes we are not always right. good luck