There have been so many things happen in the four years since I married her son. 1)Tried to convince me he was cheating on me. 2)Manipulated our relationship until we almost got a divorce 3) Tried to control when we had our child, etc.
My newest dilemna: My husband's younger brother is 15 and watches our 2 1/2 year old daughter twice a week after school until I get home from work. He gets $16.00 a week (for 4 hrs.). I just found out that each week my brother in law is forced to give his mother all of it but $5.00. This has apparently gone on for months and months. This woman is controlling this boy..makes him take a med for ADHD he doesn't have, is verbally abusive, never lets him leave the house but to come to ours and now takes his money!
My question: What do I do or say to stop this? I refuse to give him money so she can steal it all. Should I talk to her or my brother in law? Should I keep all the money until he needs it? This just isn't right and I want it to end.
2007-10-18 07:29:10 · 11 answers · asked by *Almost ready* 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I would tell him that I am going to open a bank account for him. I would give him 5 dollars and put your mom in laws share away in the account. When he needs something he will have a few dollars that he won't have to beg Mom for. I am sure she will have a fit but too bad for her. Good Luck!
2007-10-18 07:40:15 · answer #1 · answered by J d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't find a question but enjoyed reading it anyway. It is good advice and even though nobody asked you, thanks for writing it. As a MIL I would like to add a simple MYOB MIL. Translated means Mind Your Own Business Mother In Law. Not to the above writer, she's cool. But please ... MIL's .. don't give advice when you are not asked and don't tell anybody how to do something. You may be very experienced at being a mother, grandmother....etc. but things change from time to time and family to family. So, if we all MOurOB everyone is happy. It's hard not to tell a DIL she is putting the diaper on the wrong end of the baby but she'll find out soon enough.
2016-05-23 09:26:42 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband needs to talk to her. This has gone on long enough. Why has he allowed her to treat you that way and cause problems? It is not fair to keep the money from him. Ask your brother in law what he wants to do.You need to have a talk with your husband. I would tell him that his mother has to be dealt with. He is the one to do it. She needs to be told once and for all that she is to but out and you will tolerate no more of her meddling or you will not be around her. If she causes problems then stick to your word. She will either shape up or you won't have to deal with her. The verbal abuse that your brother in law is taking is not healthy for him. Can you get him some outside help. Verbal abuse is abuse and sometimes it is worst than physical abuse. I don't know how to stop her from taking his money.Ask your brother in law about it and maybe you can come up with a solution together. What does your husband say about it? Good luck.
2007-10-18 07:42:41 · answer #3 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of giving him the cash how about you and your husband just take him shopping to buy him whatever he needs so then she can't spend the money and you know where the money went.
Good luck most mother in laws are just born that way.
2007-10-18 07:49:31 · answer #4 · answered by Blessed and Happy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What about opening a savings account in his name with your husband as the secondary on the account? We sort of have the same issue with my stepson's mother. My husband opened a savings account for him and in order for our son to withdraw any money, Dad has to sign too. That put an end to his mother taking all his money!
2007-10-18 07:42:23 · answer #5 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where does your husband stand in all of this? It sounds like she's psycho and if she raised your husband it's probably nothing new to him.
I think if you keep all of the money, then she's probably going to tell your BIL that he can't watch your daughter any more.
IDK.... Have him tell her that you are broke right now and are paying him less, then he can keep the remainder of the money at your house and use it as needed?
Bless that poor kid's heart and your husbands! I know she's a pain in the butt for you too, but at least you didn't have to grow up with a woman like that - you are an adult and can see how nuts she is!
Good luck to you guys - what a mess to have to deal with. :(
2007-10-18 07:40:27 · answer #6 · answered by nite_angelica 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, I would definetly have a talk with the Mother in Law that is ridiculous, he earned that money by giving up his free time to watch his niece. If she blows it off start a savings account for him, even if it's your name, and let him choose what he wants to buy with it.
2007-10-18 07:40:49 · answer #7 · answered by Jenn L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does your husband think about this? You might try instead of giving him money, run a tab and buy him things that he wants. Or open up a saving account with yours and his name on it only and deposit the money for him.
2007-10-18 08:28:06 · answer #8 · answered by witchywish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You Need to Drop that Zero and Get yourself a hero, Kick her to the curb honey!
2007-10-18 14:28:05 · answer #9 · answered by BigPants 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stop focusing on the weaknesses of others. It will only bring you down w/ them.
As for your brother in law, it's his money. Just give it to him and if his mother is going to take it away from him, he needs to learn how to keep it. Let him learn his own lessons with his own mother and stop meddling in their lives like they are yours. You're better than this drama. Choose not to participate.
2007-10-18 07:39:18 · answer #10 · answered by rorybuns 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋