2007-10-18 06:02:10 · 7 answers · asked by VILAS S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Perhaps they don't feel the need to explain their culture. Often Americans tend to think their way is the only right way. If you say you had an arranged marriages, you may have to get into a lengthy explanation on "why on earth would you want to do that?" or people wondering why you didn't stand up for yourself--as if following your family's culture and tradition (same way americans do for their weddings and holidays) suddenly means you have no backbone.
Often they fall in love with the person and while it happened to be arranged that you met the person, now you love them with your whole heart and can't imagine life without them.
Though really this question is no different than why do some people lie about how they got together. I mean how many people tell the story of how they got together by mentioning "one drunken night at a frat party....and we've been dating ever since". Often, you don't feel it's any of the person who is asking the question's business.
2007-10-18 07:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In southeast asian culture arranged marriages have been the part of culture for centuries. Some people call it love marriage because that is what they are. As dating before marriage is not the norm and the partner chosen for the other person by the family is the person that they see as their future lover and spouse baring all others. People stay in these marriages for lifetime. The divorce rate for arranged marriages are lower than the so called "love marriages". One of the reasons being there are no unrealistic expectations from the other person.
2007-10-18 13:19:31 · answer #2 · answered by wedding59 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why do you care? These arranged marriages are not arranged overnight. The families on both sides spend years and years finding the one person based on a number of different things to find the best mate for thier child. Some times things happen out of need of money, societal position, etc. I am sure - just like here, but alot of the times, the parents are concerned that their children will have good, loving spouses at the end of it when they get married.
So why couldn't it be a love marriage? Just because it was "arranged" doesn't mean that the two can't love each other.
2007-10-18 13:07:14 · answer #3 · answered by SisterSue 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Many cultures pick the mate for thier child in other cultures however in the USA many relationships that enter into marraige are based on feelings and romantic fluff. Yes there should be an attraction, dont marry the person you can live with marry someone you cant live without you want to say thank God regarding your mate not Oh my God what have I done. Many have an immature unrealstic view of marriage I know a lady who I used to work with she is of a different faith than me and her marraige was arranged she has a son and she works and she is very happy. All marraiges should be arranged by God and a person should be praying for the spouse that God would have them to have. I never hugged my fiance close until we were engaged and I never made out with him until our wedding day when we were pronounced husband and wife and we will be married 14 years next week.
Also in arranged marraiges you learn to love the person and there is hardly any divorce.
2007-10-18 15:05:43 · answer #4 · answered by encourager4God 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have friends that are East Indian. They had an arranged marriage. The parents of the woman went through alot of men before she picked one. It was arranged, but it was also up to her to chose. It's not like they said you're marrying this guy. That's not how it worked.
They have been married almost 8 years, and are very much in love
2007-10-18 14:35:14 · answer #5 · answered by tess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because they dont want to sound like a$s backwards idots from a 4th world country whose single most important commitment was set up by their father and haggled over like trading goats or some pretty beads.
I dont know where the girl above was getting her imformation, but I knew a doctor who was going through his specialty training here in the USA. He was really upset, so I asked him what was wrong, thinking that he would be happy, as he was going home to India to visit family. His father had called him and told him that he would be getting married when he came home. He had never heard of the girl or her family, or of any plans by his father for him to get married. He was much happier when he came back to the USA, as he liked his wife very much and they quickly settled in and had a baby.
2007-10-18 13:12:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋
I over heard this guy saying "next week we are going wife shopping in india" and i was like thank god i'm american imagine meeting the man your going to spend the rest of your life with and he's 4 feet tall with no teeth eww.
2007-10-18 13:19:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋