I have three younger brothers and my parent's both make pretty good money. Going through high school my parent's pressured me to try and get scholarships.. (I was a really good runner). But I got really sick my junior and senior year and finished high school with a 3.6 and honors, and did recieve scholarships, but by no means recieved the 'full ride' my parent's were hoping for.
I attended a private school freshman year, my parents signed many loans in my name.They never saved for my tuition.
I got married the summer of my sophomore year.
we had a simple service with my immediate family and my father married us. My husband and I wanted a "real' wedding in a year or two; but as time went on my parent's did not have the money so we bargained and asked for my tuition for three years of college. My parents and my grandparents helped with comm. college, but will not help with 3rd and 4th. I am paying for my schooling.
I know it is debatable, but should i be angery with my parents?
2007-10-18 05:23:53 · 8 answers · asked by Becca 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I did not add this before, but I am not speaking with my parents. It is a long story, but in short they were putting my husband down every chance they could.
On top of all this, my parents are helping my brother with his tuition, not giving him loans.
I just feel angry because when i was living under their roof they kept telling me that when I turned 18, I was no longer their responsiblity. They are very angry and sad that I am not talking with them now.
I, not my husband am paying for my tuition.
2007-10-18 05:40:32 · update #1
No. Your parents have done their best. A college education is expensive! My daughter got a scholarship to a private college, plus student loans, and still every penny of my paycheck went to the school. Thank goodness she transferred! When my daughter married, my son in law paid for her education, for an additional two years.
Resenting your parents for not saving for your education is very self centered and immature. Someday, you will understand -- and if this issue is so important to you, I suggest that you start socking away every penny you can NOW, so that you can pay for a portion of your child's education in the future.
2007-10-18 05:41:20 · answer #1 · answered by tracy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it's normal to feel entitled to a college education from your parents but the truth is, they don't OWE you one. Many, many students each year have to cover the entire expense for all 4 years themselves. They do this by taking out federal school loans that have a low interest rate and hopefully getting a good job after graduation to pay them off. ALL kids think their parents make more money than they actually do. I always thought my parents were pretty well-off even when I was in college and matured alot. I realized throughout my life, they sacrificed alot to give me many things and didn't talk about the financial sacrifice they were making so I ended up thinking they had all this money. Be grateful you have loving parents that seem to have given you all the intangible gifts that money CAN'T buy. Do the mature thing and just take out school loans to pay for your 3rd and 4th year. Marrying takes being an adult and if you weren't ready to take on those responsibilities then perhaps you should've waited. When you get married, you and your husband form your own little family and you learn to become dependent on each other instead of on your family. You can do it. My best friend took out loans to pay for all 4 years of her schooling and all her parents could afford to pay for was books but she was never angry at them! She knew they did the best they could!
2007-10-18 05:36:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of as long as you're working in the direction of a worth purpose and your mothers and dads are no longer helping you grudgingly, then that's positive. these days it takes lots extra then a what it used to with the intention to be self sustaining. I stay in Southern California, and there is no way my youngsters would be waiting to hit upon the money for lease, foodstuff and utilities inspite of a roommate! they're going to could have a college training first and shop up as lots money at the same time as they're at homestead besides. yet while they did no longer shop up with the learning factor...it may be time for some no longer uncomplicated love! And please do no longer permit the stress of "all my acquaintances are married and characteristic youngsters" push you into following them. you're way too youthful nevertheless....once you're financially waiting and characteristic a solid job, you would be a much extra effective better half and be sure. you will no longer remorseful approximately getting your existence so as till now you upload on the household projects of a relatives.
2016-10-04 02:26:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no! You made a decision to be an adult. You are no longer the dependent of your parents legally, and you have made a decision to be an independent married adult. Before you get married versus having pre-marital sex, or even live in sin, you need to think about all these things.
I was darn near 30 before I got married. one of the things i knew was not to get married before I was financially independent. i had witnessed too many relationships and marriages just destroyed over finances. You still sitting there looking at mom and dad, and grandparents to take care of you is a pure sign you were not ready for marriage.
So who supports your husband? Where do you two live? In your parents house, his parents house?
You need to grow up. Parents paying for college is a privilege to give you an advantage, not a birth right. I am still paying off student loans for my education.
2007-10-18 05:41:48 · answer #4 · answered by rastakatblown 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should not be angry. Your parents did a lot to get you where you are. Thats why they are there. Now since you are on your own and married you need to support yourself. It must be nice to have parents that will pay for your school, even if its just part of it. I did it myself and probably will still be paying for a long while. But it's something that got me where I am today. I thank my parents for pressuring me to be independent and successful. You should too.
2007-10-18 05:42:41 · answer #5 · answered by AF 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your parents make their own decisions about how to spend their money. If they can not or do not want to pay your college tuition, it's their personal choice. they earned the money, and can spend it any way they like.
You are an adult, and i think it's perfectly ok to take out loans for college -- just be careful about the loan agreement, interest rates, and repayent plans.
I think that, if you pay for you own schooling, you might appreciate it more, anyway. I did, my sister did...
take care.
2007-10-18 05:28:45 · answer #6 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your parents aren't obligated to pay for college or a wedding. It would be nice if they could but it doesn't sound like that's an option. You can be angry if you want to, but what good is that going to do? Do a better job with your own kids.
2007-10-18 05:29:20 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's your choice to be angry with them or not. It's their choice to help you... or not. It sounds to me like they have helped you quite a bit. If they did not have the money for a big, fancy wedding why would they have the money for school? Sounds to me like they are doing what they can. You are a married woman now. Your husband can help pay your bills.
2007-10-18 05:29:47 · answer #8 · answered by Ellen L 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋