Yesterday I asked my boyfriend to marry me but he said no because he didn't see his life going in that direction right now. We've been together for 3 years and we practically live together. So I don't understand it! Should I just try to get him to change his mind or leave him and find someone who will marry me?
2007-10-18 03:44:43 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Why do you want to marry him, actually...why get married. More than 1/2 of couples end in divorce, if he said he doesnt see his life going in that direction then you have to respect that and continue to live with him, but if you want to get married and he doesnt its time to move on. Why would you try to change him mind, and have him do something he doesnt want to, its not worth it.
2007-10-18 03:51:16 · answer #1 · answered by Raz9Caz 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Why move in and give up yourselve and all this love to someone that doesnt feel the same way-
You stay because you think things will get better, well if we could all zip forward to that day we would see it doesnt happen and if he does marry you, God help you, that not what a marriage is. You both know when it the right thing, you're still living in the fairytell world you created for both of you and he really doesnt even know about that world. Ground yourself and start over by yourself after all that is were you really are. Guys stay because it is familiar and easy- there wired differently then we are, sometimes i wish i was more like them, but- If he felt the same way you did at this moment I man is very clear about making up their minds, he would leave and find what he is really longing for. You should do the same, it only hurts for a short time and believe me it won't kill you to look after yourself.
2007-10-18 04:02:37 · answer #2 · answered by Maggie O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, did you ask him if he loves you and if he sees you both together in the future and if not now than when would he like to get married? I would seriously ask him where is this relationship heading? Don't run out and get married to just anyone because you will pay for that mistake in the long run. Maybe don't spend so much time together and see if he misses having you around. I hate to say this because I am a woman too but maybe don't live with him as much and slow down on the overnight stays. The saying goes absence makes the heart grow fonder. By doing this you will see if he calls more and wants to be with you more. Try it out assume nothing..BLUEBUNNY
2007-10-18 04:01:28 · answer #3 · answered by BLUEBUNNY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I proposed to ex before, after 3 years and he said the same thing. Then I realized, why am I wasted all my time with someone who doesn't me in their future? I made so many sacrifices in my life for what? just to not get married. Now I moved on and I'm glad I did I'm experiencing things I would have never done in a relationship.
2007-10-18 03:56:42 · answer #4 · answered by Pink♥Glitter 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Depends how old you are, where you are in life, how important marriage is to you. Some people never bother to get married now, they just move in and live together for years and years, never getting married and they are both happy. It just depends what you want. I'd suggest if he isnt ready to get married after 3 years, hes not worth you waiting any longer.
2007-10-18 03:50:25 · answer #5 · answered by billgoats79 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to have one more conversation with him. Try something like this:
We've been together three years now and I have really loved you. I am ready to find a husband and get on with my life. Since you are not wanting to get married, I am going to move on with my life. Do not contact me in any way. I will not open e-mails, answer your calls, read any letters, or see you for any reason. If you ever decide you do want to marry me, you may contact me one time. If I am still available and IF I am still interested in you, we can have a talk about it then. Until then, I want no more contact with you. I'm moving on. Now you need to leave. Go! I have things to do with my life. Goodbye!
2007-10-18 03:53:05 · answer #6 · answered by missingora 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
am i able to be very immediately with you?(no pun meant) and could you listen and by no skill brush aside this yet extremely consider it because you acquire no longer something more suitable ideal to do besides? This top that is what your situation is: {i comprehend he did not mean what he suggested because....} you're making EXCUSES FOR HIM AND putting your self as a lot as BE A sufferer! Are you addicted to rejection. obviously he meant it! in the different case he don't have suggested it. possibly he received't mean it anymore the following day yet at the same time as he suggested it, he meant it. the different isn't obtainable. regardless of he suggested likely felt it for a lengthy time period and it in basic terms got here out. Sounds to me like he's performed with you. He would have some different person on the aspect. settle for it and pass on.And perfect to you contained in the destiny.
2016-10-21 08:57:40 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone. You can't force someone to marry you. I know it is hard because you love him, but if he isn't ready and marries you, you two will eventually divorce. Things happen the way they are supposed to happen. Just relax and wait. Let him know that you are ready, but if he isn't you understand and will love him anyway. You also need to tell him you will not wait forever though so he doesn't take advantage of the situation.
2007-10-18 03:58:53 · answer #8 · answered by Paula D 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Time to move on. Either he is afraid of committment or he doesn't see a long term relationship. Either don't waste your time anymore and start dating again. You are not going to get him to change his mind, and ultimately if he did, it might be short term. That's a big reason for the high divorce rate, spouses that think they can change their mate.
2007-10-18 03:54:37 · answer #9 · answered by 10SNE1 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You can't change anyone's mind, only your own. If you want to be married and he doesn't maybe you should move on. Marriage isn't the easiest thing, I would say enjoy dating, you have the rest of your life to be married.
2007-10-18 03:53:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋