Should kids be taught to have respect for their elders... for no other reason then they are adults?

Question

Me and sister are in a great debate as to this, i believe they should always , no matter what be respectful to an adult.. and she believes that a adult should have to prove themselves to the child... the reasoning for this question is how her kids act torwards adults, they mouth back and say very disrespectful things to most people older then them.. ie teachers strangers family members.

Answer 1

They need to be smacked. Then they'll know why you respect an adult.

Answer 2

I think that Children, and everyone for that matter, should respect adults and their piers alike. Sometimes, however, it is hard to respect someone if you do not trust them. Reasons for this may vary, but in some cases, people may feel that respect is a sign of submission, and the one they are respecting will become the dominant. In this case, they may use disrespect to try and maintain what they see as control over the situation (although I personally don't think that is a good way to handle the situation). It is also hard to respect someone who shows little or no respect for you, as many adults (at least the one I have seen) tend to do with children. Although I think if someone does not respect you, you should be the bigger person and respect them anyways, most people don't see it that way.
In my opinion, it is too bad, because I think if people where just a little more decent to each other on regular basis, the quality of society as a whole would change for the better.

Answer 3

Interesting question, but wouldn't you say respect should be shown to all regardless of age? By not teaching a child to respect others the child is being taught not to respect themselves. At one point wouldn't the child question one's own self-worth. When they start to disagree with mom, where does the respect go then? How would she expect to "regain" this respect. Respect is not an agreement with what the other is saying. Is it respect or authority that she is really questioning? There are so many points in this argument. I have also read in above arguments about "kidnapping and being thrown out of school". Personally I have taught my children "common sense" and that if ANYONE ever says "I'll tell your parents and you'll be in trouble or the cops would be mad" I tell my children "I have the last say and I will NEVER be mad if you tell me or the cops. Adults do not need a child's help with anything."

Answer 4

I think we walk a very fine line here. While I do think that children should respect adults they also need to know that not every adult is a good person and should be open to talking to parents about any problems. There is just too much abuse in the world to preach to kids "respect your elders". I think it's kept many a child from telling on an abusive adult....just my two cents....

Answer 5

I can't stand it when people think adults need to prove themselves to children. I don't think a child necessarily needs to feel respect for an adult, but I do think they always, always should TREAT adults with respect. What gives a child enough judgement to decide whether someone deserves respect? I cannot stand children with poor manners. It is a reflection on the parents and gives children a false sense that they are the center of the universe.

Answer 6

Kids should always respect their elders. An adult should not have to "prove" themselves to a child. This is going to come back to bite your sister in her butt when her children are older and bigger than she is, and she won't have any control over what they do and she'll wonder where she went wrong when they are doing drugs, pregnant at 14, or in jail or worse.

Answer 7

Yes, I think children should be taught to respect adults. The "no matter what" bothers me though. Usually an adult who deserves respect will treat a child the same. Kids do need to be a little savvy and learn to follow their gut. We don't want them to be so respectful that they'd follow a kidnapper into his car.
But I do know what you mean. I see so many kids being rude around adults and even worse to their parents.

Answer 8

This is tough for me. I'm a mom, so I have always wanted to teach my children the right thing - but I'm also the type of Mom that wants to give my kids some credit for having some sense of their own and not just blindly doing what I say they should do.

My take on it is that ALL people should be treated with respect, no matter their age or race or social status. I think that we should approach everyone with the idea that they are worthy of respect. Treat everyone as you would want to be treated.

I think that life is easier that way. If you start out treating someone with respect, then whatever interaction you have with them will go more smoothly and you will have a basis for a real relationship.

But . . . if that person then proves him/herself to not be worthy of that respect then I would advise just ignoring them. Being outwardly disrespectful - such as mouthing off or name calling - can be seen as confrontational. So unless you want to get into a fight with someone or really need to settle something with them, just walk away.

If I need to set limits with someone that I consider not worthy of my respect then I just say something like, "You know I'm really not interested in getting into this with you. Please leave me alone from now on." Sometimes you can't do this, like with a teacher or a boss, but you can be polite without being warm or friendly.

Being disrespectful yourself just lowers you to their level and causes more problems. Be a bigger person.

Answer 9

give respect to get respect . no child shold mouth off just because they arent getting their way. but that doesnt mean an adult has the right to down talk a child just because they feel like they are adults and have that right.
it all depends. but teachers are a tough one to consider... seeing how i got cussed out by one then when i stated how he was an asshole for doing so...i got kicked out of high school.... so i say...yes respect adults... but remind them they have a mind of their own and help them identify right from wrong. there are too many sick people in this world to fill a kids head with " adults knows best because theyve been here longer b/s"... i also almost got kiddnapped due to the whole "respect adults"... id say right them when they are wrong....

Answer 10

I think all kids should have respect for adults, no matter who the adult is. Why should the parents prove anything to their own kids? Being a parent myself I teach my kids to have the up most respect for adults and elders. If kids don't have respect for adults when they are young whats going to happen when they reach teenage years?

Answer 11

My opinion, they should be taught to respect people because they are people...not because adult are adults. Sometimes adults do not deserve respect...at least not the upmost respect as many parents try to demand from their children!

For example, i have gotten into tiffs with my father since i learned how to talk...i was more or less standing up for myself...yet it could of very easily been turned around as being disrespectful towards him. My father did and still does many things that are disrespectful, and i stand up for myself..sometimes you must be blunt if you stand up for yourself and if that persons doesn't like you being blunt and honest as how they feel that came be turned around as disrespect! However, I do respect my father as a human being, he has good qualities and i do tell h im that i love him, and i do say please and thank you to him when hes done something nice for me. However if he has done something that is against my beliefs, or is purposely picking on me to hurt me, I can and WILL stand up for myself.

I guess what my point is, is there needs to be a middle ground. Children need to be taught to respect others young and old, however you do not want to teach them that its ok to be bullied or disrespected...just because that person is older then them. You need to teach them that its ok to stand up for themselves as well. So frankly i believe both of you are right. Because there is a middle ground...its not as black and white as you have put it!

btw...my dad is a narscissic dry drunk...thats why...do you really believe an alcoholic deserves the up most respect just because hes older? If he abuses in one form or another?