asked similar question under different name but not getting the right answers...
my bf of 3 years (we don't live together. i have 3 little girls i care for part-time whom he loves and sees often) asked for some "me-time" after we went on an overnite camping trip on the 5th of this month. the first day he asked for it, i wasn't too upset but when he asked again (b/c he was going to be working late and couldn't sleep well the day before-we work nites), i thought he was lying and drove to his work to check on him (BIG mistake) he got mad and dissappeared for a few days. called me and we hung out for a few hours w/my kids. the next day he said he just wanted to relax for the day-i got mad again b/c i wanted him to spend time w/me and the kids. he disappeared again.
i emailed him to apologize and tell him i understood his need for alone time and that it didnt mean he didnt love me. i said to call me when ready and i loved him. he emailed back writing only-"i love you too",,,
2007-10-17 22:59:15 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i'm totally confused as to what that meant. i had emailed him a few times before that and he didnt write back. but when i emailed him to say it was ok for him to take his time and i didnt want to lose him-then he emails me back saying i love you too.
does this mean we are ok? that he's going to stay with me?
we normally spend this upcoming fri-sat together but i'm scared that he's going to ask me to come get my things for good.
does the just writing i love you mean he doesn't want to leave me and is happy i'm respecting his needs?
help!! i suck at this stuff and YES i'm seeing a counselor b/c i feel i'm too needy/clingy in relationships. i feel that i need to stop doing stuff like this or the best thing in my life (besides god and my kids) will be gone forever. so i DO recognize that i have a problem and i'm doing my best to correct it.
2007-10-17 23:00:33 · update #1
You have three kids and that could put any well-intentioned young man on the defensive. You actually lost him by "checking up on him" which apparently made him feel that he wasn't trustworthy or that you didn't love him for him - his deeds seemed #1.
You'd best get used to being alone with the kids since it takes awhile to find a man when you're that busy.
2007-10-17 23:06:26 · answer #1 · answered by Your Uncle Dodge! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its ok just take some time to continue being friends
Just follow some tips;
Stop clinging
Develop interesting hobbies
Try forgetting him
Try to know him more as a person and a friend
Dont spend nights with him
Just figure out what he wants
He might be having fun and lying so just be wary
Dont love so easily men values a mysterious woman who plays hard to get
Live for the kids for now
Take time off and travel elsewhere
be independent
depend on dependable people and family and good friends for starters
Just take him as a friend and dont worry about where he goes. The more you run after he will also run away. The more you play hard to get the more he wants you for you.
2007-10-18 06:04:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything mafia girl said. It's all so hard I know, but the answer to your question is yes, if he wasn't returning any emails it's because he needs a total break from THINKING about you and your kids, not just seeing you. It's a lot for a guy to take. For him to email only that he loves you back means "yes, he'll be back, but leave me alone for now." ouch. I've been there. you probably need to find someone who can handle you and your issues rather than you catering to him and his issues. I'm glad you're in couseling. I was exactly where you are 5 years ago. Things just got harder, he got meaner, we have a baby together and now we're broken up. I'm happy to be out of it girl, but it takes a lot of stregth and growing up. I promise you, you won't always need someone. When you start to recognize where your neglect and abandonment issues stem from and learn to find joy in larger causes than your own, you'll have made it! Go volunteer or find a cause to "march" for. Seriously, you will meet way better men in those scenarios. Wish I could hug you. I'll cry with you though. You're not alone. Dare to dream!!!! (And if he's a scorpio leave him out of the dream.)
2007-10-18 06:17:27 · answer #3 · answered by Jellicle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to trust him. Just give him some time I think he will come around. I think he does love maybe he truly just needs some alone time.
2007-10-18 06:16:42 · answer #4 · answered by cset2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋