Sadly two months ago my Cat Cleo passed away. She was a lovely cat who I was very fond of. I had her for 19 and a half years (cats are reallyonly meant to live to 16), so obvioulsy she was a big part of my life.
Now the thing is the house is very lonely, and I miss my cat obviously. So now I have got round to considering getting a new cat. The problem is i'm wondering when it's appropriate to get a new cat.
The reason i say 'appropriate' is that part of me thinks its a bit disrespectful to Cleo's memory to get a cat soon after her death......as if i'm trying to replace her in the way you'd just replace an old TV with a new one. That viewpoint makes me feel awful.
But on the other hand life goes on, and I know there are many cats in need of a good home which i know i can provide, surely there is no need to wait.
What do people think? I know you may laugh a bit that i'm trying not to disrespect my old cat, but people with long-term pets will know that they become family.
2007-10-17 21:41:49 · 33 answers · asked by tominator1uk 3 in Pets ➔ Cats
The average life expectanctcy for a domestic cat is 16.
2007-10-17 21:47:03 · update #1
Firstly I am sorry for your loss. Cleo can never be replaced and will always have a part of your heart.
The time to get a new cat is the when you think you are ready, it doesn't matter how long or how soon it is after Cleo has left you and you are not disrespecting her in any way.
As you say there are many cats needing a home. I would contact your local cat rescue/cats protection league/rspca and arrange a visit.
When you go to see the other cats remember, you don't have to choose one there and then. See how YOU feel in their company, then you will know if it is the right time to offer a cat a new and happy home. If you are in any doubt go away and return latter when you feel ready.
Over the years I have lost 4 cats all bar one to old age (Samantha died of feline leukemia at just 8 months) and after a while I just know when I am ready to offer a home to a cat who needs one. It took me 5 visits to our local cat orphanage before I decided to bring my newest family member, Tilly, home. This was 5 months after my Sasha went to sleep.
You will never forget Cleo but life goes on and the best way to honour Cleo is to give another cat the chance of a happy life that they may never have otherwise.
All the best to you whatever your decision.
2007-10-18 10:00:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you feel you're ready, get a cat as a tribute TO Cleo. Because of her loving nature you feel able to share you home and heart with yet another cat in need with no second thoughts. That is indeed a high tribute to her.
You're not replacing her. In fact the new cat will be nothing like Cleo, rest assured. It may even be disappointing in the beginning that the new cat doesn't act like your other cat. Go to the shelters and look around. Don't go with the intention to adopt. Think about the qualities you want in a cat and shop around for it. Wait until you find the right one. If there's one waiting there for you you'll know it.
2007-10-17 22:05:08 · answer #2 · answered by gymsock 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
there is no right time and no wrong time its up to you when you feel the time is right. if your a good pet owner its only right they become part of the family. One of my cats died suddenly aug 2006 aged 18 months at the time i couldn't get another one i was grieving to much to even think about it cuz like you i would have felt disrespectful for to her memory now 15 months later i still can't not because of not being able to replace her but because my other cat has got used to being a single cat and would be so jealous if i brought another one home but i do know that if i hadn't got her and i pray to god that day is a long way off i would get another one there are so many cats waiting for new loving homes and it sounds like you have alot of love to give one.If it helps when you get one take your old cats name and jumble the letters around to make a new name that way you keep the memory of your cat alive. Good luck in what you decide to do.
2007-10-17 23:51:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a compliment to Cleo that you loved and miss her so much that you would like another cat. You will never replace her. One cat can never take the place of another in your heart, but the new little one will bring its love with it, and it will fill your empty arms. The animal charities are all overflowing with needy little creatures, whether you want a kitten, or an older cat. At least one will find a happy ending.
2007-10-18 07:56:00 · answer #4 · answered by steffi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My cat Binx died about 3 month ago. I miss him every single day but now have a 3 month old kitten called Marmalade.
It's not disrespectful to crave the company of a cat and I'm sure Cleo would understand.
I have to admit, I did feel quite bad, like I didn't mourn Binx for long enough. But, I now sponsor a pen in a local cat shelter in his name so he'll never be forgotten. Maybe this would be a good way to honor Cleos memory and alleviate any guilt. Plus, you get to help homeless kitties as a bonus!
2007-10-17 22:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by katieplaysdead 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't need to feel guilty about thinking of getting another cat. The fact that you are considering getting another cat reflects how much you loved Cleo and how important she was in your life. I am sure that the new cat will appreciate the love that you can give to it and you should not hold back if you feel you are ready. The new cat will help you to remember Cleo by its similarities and differences.
No-one will think badly of you for taking a new cat into your home.
2007-10-17 21:56:54 · answer #6 · answered by collingbournekingston 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I understand your feelings. I had a cat (named Mauro) for 5 years and when he passed away i wanted to get a new one, but i was hesitating because i felt that it was not the appropriate thing to do, just replacing one so much loved cat with another. I felt guilty even thinking about it.
Fortunately enough, my husband brought me a new kitty home, about a month since Mauro passed away. At first, i had second thoughts, but then i realized that she was just another little soul looking for a home and a family. Now i am so happy to have her every day waiting for me when i come back from work. And that does not mean that i don`t have Mauro still in my heart.
So, what i think, is that since you are the kind of person that can give love and home to a cat in need, you should not wait at all.
I think somewhere out there is a furry friend waiting for you.
2007-10-17 22:04:43 · answer #7 · answered by sofia r 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Its always sad when you lose a pet, not alot of people see them as not just an animal but part of the family, If you feel ready to have another cat, (which you must do to some degree or you wouldn't be thinking about it) then go ahead I'm sure your old cat Cleo wouldn't feel disrespected she would just be happy that your looking after other felines in the lovely way you looked after her, Good Luck.
2007-10-17 21:53:10 · answer #8 · answered by aimee r 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't think of it as being disgraceful to Cleo's memory - think of it almost as a tribute to her. I think Cleo would be delighted to know you wanted to give a good home to another needy cat. And you are not trying to replace her, because all cats have their own personalities, you would be offering a loving home to an animal who really needs it. You are clearly a true cat lover (like me!) and I think you should go for it as soon as you feel ready. You will never forget Cleo, and getting a new cat won't mean you love her any less. Rest in peace, lovely Cleo, and good luck to you!
2007-10-17 22:30:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know exaclty what you mean, though in slightly different circumsances. My cat was 18months old when he was run over and killed. I took it very hard, but we moved on quickly and got a new kitten within the month. I did feel very disloyal to start with but after a few days I started to be able to think about my other cat without feeling so sad. We've now had her for 2 months now and I'm glad we moved so soon as it's very easy to say to yourself that you won't get another to save yourself from the hurt again. You're not disrespecting your cat after all this time and you;re right, there are so many other little helpless babies needing homes, you'll feel good about yourself for helping them.
2007-10-18 02:10:23 · answer #10 · answered by gotmeridindirty 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋