I am now 7 months pregnant (32 weeks).! 2 more month to go. I'm under alot of stress every since I told my ex we are expecting a baby. Now he doesn't want to go home. he practicly moved in with me. he does everything for me, he is so sweet, since i'm on bed rest I don't mind. he reads to the baby and plays music to the baby. which I don't mind at all, but yesterday I found a ring in hisjakect. I wasn't being nosy i was just gonna hang it in the closet for him. anyway the ring fell out. we've been talking about raising the baby together and yes I did sleep with him 4 times since I've told him about the baby and he left his fiance. but i really dont want to be married, i hope he is not going to propose to me. I dont want to be with him that way. i just want to raise our child together.it's a really complecated story. help. please rechearch my previouse questions if you are confuse. should i confront him about the ring?
2007-10-17 11:49:00 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He didn't cheat on me or his ex-fiance. I found out I was pregnant after we broke up, and honestly we broke up because i didnt want to get married. we were together for almost 8 years, im just not the marrying type. I love him I do but i dont want to get married. But he does want to get married. he told me after we broke up he only propose to the girl because he thought he was in love. but he was still in love with me. Telling him the baby news was the best thing I did for him , so his ex-fiance left him because she didn t want to deal with the drama,(thats what she said) which i dont blame her. at all. I'm just really stressed right now.
2007-10-18 06:13:25 · update #1
I understand the question and yes you should confront him, let him know that that is not where you are. I am sure that he will feel better if you talk to him now, then tell him no if he asks you to marry him. I know that it is had but if you don't want that kind of relationship maybe you shouldn't sleep together you might be sending the wrong signals. Good luck with the baby and everything.
2007-10-17 12:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Sara♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This sounds very complicated. I think your baby father is a great guy and he seems like he will be a great guy. he also sound like someone who make desicion without thinking. From what I read in your last question, it looks as if he met this girl right after you and him broke up, and not even a year he wants to marry her. Either he really wants to get married or he was really heartbroken from your relationship.
I think he wants to be with you. and it's ok to not want to get married but you are already pregnant with his child. obviously you don't hate him because you are still sleeping with him. The question is why don't you want to get married after an 8 year relationship and a baby on the way. what is holdong you back? what are you afraid of? remember you are living in SIN, you know you love him. I think the best thing for you do it pray. Only god can help you. But if I were you I would marry him. Good man are hard to find.
2007-10-19 06:43:26 · answer #2 · answered by Ethan's Mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could the ring be from his previous fiance? If you are not wanting to be married right now then don't accept if he proposes, or you can broach the subject before he does.. like "I'm glad that we don't have to run off and get married just because we're have a baby, I'm glad you've been so supportive." something like that.. Tell him what's on your heart and make it clear that you are happy he's there for you and your child so he doesn't get hurt too bad if he was going to ask you to marry him. best of luck to you.
2007-10-17 14:52:22 · answer #3 · answered by tainted_obsession 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! YES! YES!
Huge red flags here!
While you admit it's a really complicated story, do NOT complicate it further by jumping into marriage. Trust me, you'll be under more stressed as a new mother. It's great that he wants to help raise his child. That should be expected of any man who fathered a baby. But, please learn to grow and mature as a couple first, and as parents, before making a LIFETIME committment to marriage.
Please confront him in a kind way that he will understand. If it is meant to be, then you will have a lifetime together! But his timing is all wrong.
One of my dear friends decided well until her son was past 1 to finally marry the father of her child. They were only dating 3 months when she discovered she was pregnant. She refused to get married until they decided to marry for the right reasons. 5 years later and a 2nd child, she knew she made the right decision.
All the best to you!
2007-10-17 11:59:56 · answer #4 · answered by Sharon F 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if that is the story and you love him and he loves you, then quit being scared and just do it if he asks you. If you change your mind later, you can always get a divorce. Hopefully you won't, and everything will work out great. You have to always think positive about things and quit worrying so much. Remember, it's his life too and you only live once. Wouldn't it be sad if you two stay in love forever and you are sitting around at sixty-something with him regretting that he never got to have a wedding that he wanted so badly to prove his love to the girl of his dreams?
2007-10-17 14:34:27 · answer #5 · answered by jennniferlea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you know it's not the ring he gave his ex-fiance?
Don't confront him. Just wait to see if he asks you. If so, you can let him down gently.
He obviously feels a commitment if he broke up with his fiance because you're pregnant. Seems like he wants to do the right thing.
2007-10-17 14:07:37 · answer #6 · answered by michnjonaustin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say, marry him. unless you REALLY hate wim. if you REALLY hate him, then tell him you found a ring in his jackret, and (if you'r sure it's a wedding ring for you) tell him you don't want a relationship with him, and send him away before it gets too far. BUT that would hurt his feelings and be really sad and...and...sniff...
so if you like him at all, marry him! I can't even imagine trying to look after a child all alone, having a job while the kid is still breastfeeding would be so hard, if the kid grows up and her parents arn't even married, just living together, well, that's kinda strange. But i have to admit, it would be better then going through your parents divorce, so if you don't like the guy....
2007-10-17 12:01:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Wait until he tries to give it to you. You dont have to say yes. You can just say that its a lovely thought but you'd like to wait awhile to make sure that this will be a forever thing. Pregnancy is a very emotional time but if he can survive a crying baby at all hours, he just may be worth the marriage certificate.
2007-10-17 11:58:18 · answer #8 · answered by Diane M 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you are making a rather large assumption that he is going to give the ring to you. I would wait until he asks you, if he even does.. and then address the issue.
2007-10-17 12:10:09 · answer #9 · answered by musicgrl42002 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You may want to wait until he asks, because you don't want to get ahead of yourself. Becasue even though you all are playing house the ring may not be for you!
2007-10-17 12:07:50 · answer #10 · answered by Bad_Kity 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋