sex question?

Question

i'm 18..

so me and my bf are both virgins...well we tried to have sex the other night. and since its our first time's it didnt ex happened as we thought. First, we couldnt ex get it to stay in.. he was on top of me and it was dark so he couldnt see what to do. so then i tried being on top of him..which didnt seem to be all that great either and it wouldnt stay in! so.. we barely got it in and it hurt so bad. so i was wondering what are some good positions or tricks or if anyone has any advice about having sex for the first time? amnd yes he was hard! Help plz! this is embarrasing but idk what to do and we want to have sex!

Answer 1

could be that your hymen was keeping things from going in all the way. go do the Dr and have things checked.. and while you are there.. get a script for some BC so you don't have a rug rat running around next year!

Answer 2

Maybe you should just relax and stop thinking that you want to have sex. That puts pressure on both of you and will make you more nervous. Instead, when you are in the mood just go to bed for a cuddle, fully clothed, and see what happens. Don't expect anymore and just enjoy being together - that's what it's all about, there's no rush. If things go further, that's okay, if they don't that's okay too. Make sure it's what you both want and you talk about what you're going to do first. Don't be embarrassed - no one knows what to do, think or feel the first time. I would suggest that to begin you forget the sex and just touch each other. If the time is right it will happen, but nothing has to lead to sex. To help you get used to it I would try you both lying on your sides, with him behind you (spooning) and let him rub his penis against you, but not necessarily inside. Then when you're ready to take things a step further perhaps you should go on top and then you can control how deeply you are penetrated and take it slowly. Try not to go too deep, or for too long to begin with. Only do what you're both comfortable with, when and if you're ready and have fun. Hope this helps - good luck!

Answer 3

ok well make sure you are on birthcontrol first ok so no babies, an use a condom, maybe you were possibly dry down there an if so its hard to get the thing in if so, so use some lubercation it sales near the condom area at almost any store, rub that near your private an on his, now since it is both of your guys first time i think he should be on top now since your not broken in, its gonna take some time, try with some light maybe tv or something so he can see a little, an if you can play with yourself a bit so its a little easier, then help him find the correct whole lol, now he has to hold his shaft an kinda wiggle the head in sloooowwwly, yeah its gonna hurt believe me my first time i kinda cried a tiny bit, well once the head is fully in the the more he goes in the more he begins to slowly let go of himself, once he is completely in he still has to go slow for a while till your ok, you make sure you breath alot it helps, then if you guys like you can switch positions to the side but i think it might hurt you too much for your first time to be on top cause it goes in an angle that will stretch you more down there, k well good luck.

Answer 4

Ok, first of all keep the lights on. You wouldn't try doing most things in the dark the first time, so why would you with sex!

It would probably be easier with him on top I think, but make sure he uses his fingers and/or gives you plenty of oral so you are wet and relaxed and ready for it. Use extra strong condoms and maybe lube if you are having trouble.

It might hurt a bit, don't be afraid, it doesn't always (my first time was actually AMAZING)

Maybe a glass of wine to help relax too?
(I'm talking a glass, not a bottle!!! Being drunk would be a bad idea!)

Answer 5

Pain is normal. Being uncomfortable is normal. For some, the first few times make you feel sore, as it's been an unused muscle or even hurt, if you aren't properly lubericated, if the guy is in a hurry, doesn't arouse you and your body isn't ready.

Things that help - relaxing, foreplay, being fully aroused or better yet, you having an orgasm FIRST or using a lubricant like KY-Jelly or Astro-Glide can help.

Answer 6

First u need to relax!! Both of you!! Why dont you guys try a little 69 action and than ease into you being on top cowgirl style. If hes a virgin and so are you doing this for awhile he will pop pretty quick until he learns to control and breath right. but this way you can ride him and he can do a lower thrust of the his hips while your on top. Have fun and be safe!!

Answer 7

Turn the lights on so you can see what you're doing!! Just until you get the hang of it anyway. Use lots of lube, relax and enjoy. It will probably hurt for the first time (it did for me and I had used tampons before) so just take it slow. If it doesn't feel good, stop for the night and try again another day.

Answer 8

I would say you are not ready first of all but the best postions in my option for first times is him on top and yes it is going to hurt the fact that it would not stay in i would say it was not hard enough to go in and stay there my thought is the both of you were nerves so relax next time and take your time

Answer 9

the first time i had sex, i had no idea what i was doing either. its all about trial and error. the book store has tons of books on healthy love lives and problems that may occur. i suggest you and your boyfriend get some and do some reading. they are very helpful books for couples of any age. you shouldn't be embarrased either. sex is natural, and should be talked about more. There is also a show on tv called talk sex with sue Johanson. she has alot of god information on there too!

Answer 10

It might be a good idea to ease into it gently don't forget because you are a virgin your hymen has to break that's most probably why he couldn't stay inside and why it hurt so much, you may also have been tense and not realised so that will make it harder.Don't rush because it will be painful, try doggy style or you lie with your back to him with your leg raised a little, also try a little bit of lubricant. Good luck x

Answer 11

Well my first time was ok, but my second time hurt like hell. It takes a while to get used to sex. Things like being nervous and not relaxing causes muscles to tighten down there, plus it would hurt a lot less and will be easier to get in, if you use a lubricated condom, lots of Lube !!