How do I cope with two babies in the house?

Question

The two babies is actually my 23 year old fiance and my 14 year old brother who is staying with me. I can get sometime so angry when their stuff lies all over the floor, when they play playstation all the time and hurts my cats. I used to yell at them when they did something wrong, but then every one was angry at me, now I just keep my mouth not saying anything to anyone. but sometimes they can get so nagging and annoying asking me what is wrong. When I tell them what is wrong then they get angry at me, hit the wall slam the doors and just handling everything with anger. I dont know what to do anymore. I am fed up with these two babies, just wish both of them could act their age. Should I start yelling at them agian or what should I do

Answer 1

Okay....First stop cleaning after them...and join them...for a week...and if they do not change, keep on doing it....Sometimes we have to put our foot in someone's shoes to feel the happiness and the pain.

Answer 2

Yelling never works with men, and it sounds like they are playing off each other. Your 14yr old brother is in desperate need of the discipline your 23yr old fiance didn't get.

Very first thing, if they are hurting your cat, PROTECT IT. It can't protect itself and if you are simply letting it get hurt then you are as guilty of animal abuse as they are. Tell both of them that if you ever see or suspect they are abusing your cat again, that they are both out. Send your brother back to your parents and throw the "fiance" out on his own. If you don't have a backbone to help this defenseless animal then take it to the pound. Even being put to sleep is better than being tortured.

Decide what your rules are if its your house or apartment. Tell them what the rules are, and what the consequences are. Send your brother back where he came from and toss the "fiance" out. If you are a smart woman, you will not marry this inconsiderate, abusive, immature little boy. Why would you live a life like that when you know better?

Answer 3

Sounds like some lifestyle changes need to be made quickly or you or one or both of them should move out. I had this problem for a while then I reminded everyone in a family meeting (with no TV on,) that I work full time and spend 3+ hours a day commuting in heavy traffic to and from work, I'm not a maid, laundress, food shopper, errand runner, the local mechanic, bill payer etc etc. and that they were all over the age of 18, that they were living in MY house and if they didn't contribute to the upkeep of the house by at at least cleaning up their messes and taking care of the animals (we have 3 cats and 2 dogs that everyone wanted but only Mom cares for,) that they were welcome to find other accommodation's and if they decided to come back home, the locks would be changed. This was certainly a very rude awakening and I haven't had a problem since.....try it and let me know how you make out.

Answer 4

Get rid of the finance. You have no reason to marry that jerk. Obviously your brother has some reason to live with you and you probably can't change that but you certainly should not marry a man that treats you like your fiance does. If you think he's bad now, just wait until you've been married for a while and the "honeymoon is over".

Then you must get your brother under control. They are probably working together and against you and if your fiance is gone you have a better chance of getting control.

Answer 5

Congrats on the 23 yr old fiance who still acts like a child, gotta' a winner there....nagging will get you no where...get a large box, when something is on the floor, put in the box(it's your box, dispose of it as you see fit). That will get their attention real fast! You have to be consistent, it's like dog training. The only statement you need to make is that you choose not to live like a pig...walk away.

Answer 6

yelling is not going to solve anything with these two. you have to let your brother know that you are doing HIM the favor of letting him live with you and he better start respecting what you say. you will not put up with his not listening to you, if he doesn't start listening he can find another place to live. as far as your fiance, he is not respecting you by what he is doing, and if he doesn't want to listen to you now, what is going to happen when you get married??? i'd let him know that you are not happy in what he is doing and if you are going to have a good relationship you each have to care for the other's feelings. if he gets angry at that, you better start thinking of WHAT you want for the rest of your life, and, start working on that instead of trying to fix someone who will not change.

Answer 7

Clean only that which u use. Kitchen, bath ,etc. Don't clean their clothing don't do anything for them anymore. They are more than capable of taking care of/cleaning up after themselves. They just have (much like many men) been coddled by the women in their lives (including yourself). Just take a stance and see what happens. They'll get sick of living in squalor and wearing dirty clothes eventually. Good luck.

Answer 8

Remember when your parents yelled at you when you were growing up? You probably didn't hear a word they said.

It's YOUR place, i assume, since you said these two are living with you -- so you can ask them both to move, i guess?

Why would you be engaged to someone who acts like a child. Maybe rethink that one.

take care of YOU -- no one else will.

Answer 9

take the playstation and throw it away. then they will have time to do something like help you clean and talk.

Answer 10

hurt your cats? LOL! sounds like guys just being guys. you can bit@h all you want but I don't think it'll help I think the best thing you can do is leave the house when you get upset