His daughter is 10 years old and is the only child. He caters to her every whim and she is spoiled rotten. She is very manipulative and comes across as trying to be sweet, but i see through that crap, mind u i used to be her age. I keep trying to tell her dad that she does not want to see him with me, but he keeps thinking that i am trying to keep trouble going. He is good to me, but i feel as if like i am playing second fiddle. Should i be feeling this way?
2007-10-16 21:25:32 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I understand where you're coming from, but his first priority is to his daughter. So many parents have intense guilt about breaking up the "parental unit" (mom and dad) that they will do a lot to make their children happy. He probably won't change this behavior anytime soon, so either learn to deal or move along! Good luck.
2007-10-16 21:34:50 · answer #1 · answered by prettyinpink 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will always play second fiddle. That is the way it should be. You are an adult and you can take care of yourself. The child can not take care of herself. It is an adjustment for a new mate and a child to get tother and will take some time. If you like him, you have to like all of him and that includes his children. I actually had a new gf say to me "it's either her, or me". I still can't believe I heard those words. All I could do was stare at her. Then she got up and left and I hever heard from her again. And that was a bummer for me. I liked her. I he is a good dad, he will protect his little girl and until you are deep into a long term relationship with this guy, stay away frm advising him on child rearing. Good luck.
2007-10-16 21:44:46 · answer #2 · answered by ninety9point8 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i understand your feeling, but on the other hand i also understand his daugther for acting that way. maybe, she's used for being his daddy's pet, before you came. she is the center of his attention, until she met you and find out that aside from her there's now another woman in her daddy's life, it's very understandable for a girl her age... she is jealous by your presence, she see's you as a rival to her dad's love and attention... now, i ask you, do you really love this guy? if you say yes, then why should you leave him and give up that easily? why not try to win his daugthers heart? she may give you a hard time at first, but i'm sure if you have enough patience and sincere in pleasing her, like whenever you see each other give her first your attention rather than the father. try to know her weakness , her favorite and if you have time try to invite her out just the two of you, or play with her, teach her to love you in an unobvious way, believe me it will work like magic that sooner you two will become friends, then she will realize that you deserve to be a part of their family and be her second mom.. and you're not the only one who'll benefit here, your guy will be happy knowing that both of you are now in good terms, and knowing that you're putting your effort to please him by also pleasing his daugther will make him love you more...
if your answer to my question is, no... then, why waste time and give yourself a hard time in dealing with a spoiled brat, just LEAVE. that simple.
2007-10-16 22:22:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
a great style of situations while youngsters act out and coach jealousy it relatively is because of the fact they're under pressure. undergo in strategies, to her you're an interloper who has moved into her residing house along with her mom. maximum little ones entertain the myth that their father and mom gets back at the same time and that their broken relatives will grow to be finished back. You in her mom's mattress are an instantaneous threat to the belief of her daddy coming residing house and he or she's reacting predictably with anger and jealousy. getting into any way authoritarian along with her will in basic terms stress the wedge deeper. Any discipline needs to come back from her bio mom somewhat than a specified to stranger. I agree it truly is beside the point and undesirable modelling to permit her to sleep in an identical mattress with an unrelated male. yet on an identical time shacking up in a house with a new child is a undesirable occasion to set. The unfavorable new child has plenty to handle. wait and see and enable her mom take the lead. If the situation does no longer choose, this is probably not a solid situation to marry into.
2016-10-12 22:25:13 · answer #4 · answered by condom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears unwise on your part to be a wedge between the affections of a father and his daughter. If you do not want to leave, you should win the heart of the daughter with your love. If you fail, you may decide to leave.
2007-10-16 21:35:36 · answer #5 · answered by yogeshwargarg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT
but u must love her cause u love him,shes a part of him,try 2join her in girls stuff,2treat her like a friend,explain 2her that shes a very important thing in your life.she feels insecure with having another woman in her daddy's life.
2007-10-16 21:31:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's a package deal and if you can't take the kid too, then you need to move on and find someone who you aren't going to end up resenting becasue he has a bratty little kid.....kids are that way and she sees you as a threat and doesn't want a replacement for her mother....if you can't find a way to deal with it then you aren't going to be happy with this one no matter how good he is......
2007-10-16 21:28:55 · answer #7 · answered by #1 bossman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry but his daughter is his daughter she will always come first in his books. deal with it, if you cant accept it then move on because it wont and should not change.
2007-10-16 21:41:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't leave if you love him, try to treat this girl as you are her mother .
2007-10-16 21:39:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what you feel about it is not wrong, you just have to know how to more creative to dealing with his daughter.
2007-10-16 21:37:09 · answer #10 · answered by yudy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋