I've been hanging out with this guy and we have sex on a regular basis. He's introduced me to his friends and we go out to dinner alot but nothing ever official has been said about our "status"
I don't need to be his "gf" or anything like that (I'm 19 he's 23, its ok if its just physical) I just want to know if you guys think he'll be offended if I ask to go on a official "date" with him because I think I may like him and I think he wants more from our relationship too.
Also I don't want to offend him by asking him on a date if he thinks we are already dating which I'm not sure if he does or not.
I need help!
2007-10-16 19:02:08 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We go out together all the time, he takes me to dinner, do stuff with his friends and hangs out with my friends, we go shopping. I'm just not sure if its a friends w/ benefits or something more.
Thanks
2007-10-16 19:11:20 · update #1
To R J
I don't think there are other girls. He pretty much works crazy long hours and goes to college full time too, so we are together on his days off and when he gets off work. Plus I leave like all my stuff at his house and in his car so I don't think other girls are involved.
We met by getting set up informally on a double date and things have just progressed from there.
Again, thanks you guys for all your input
2007-10-16 19:34:29 · update #2
You should ask him exactly what his feelings are toward you and your relationship to him. Otherwise your setting yourself up for the possibility of getting hurt in the end.
2007-10-16 19:06:57 · answer #1 · answered by none 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting, well if he never asked you to be his girl it's not official. What he is doing is using you and playing you as a fool. Yeah he is taking you to dinner and showing you to his friends. But are you around him all the time? So for the time that you're not with him. He could be messin with another girl showing off another girl makin5g it look like he's a pimp when he just ain't got caught yet. If yfou're cool with having sex then just establish that you too are F%$^ Buddies or friends with bennefits whatever you wanna call it. If he gets offended it's because he's trying to take any pressure or guilt away from him and trying to make it look like something different. That's all i can say
2007-10-17 02:14:30 · answer #2 · answered by R. J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of this like putting a fish in a new tank of water, it has to be slow and gradual. If you haven't really spent much time outside the sheets (gone out, anywhere) then maybe say "hey, wanna catch a movie" or "want to get some burger king" you know something simple, nothing too big or official. Just test the waters first and if you're both comfortable, then go out on an official date.
2007-10-17 02:07:34 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Gosh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then don't ask him on a date... instead, talk to him, about how much fun you are having, spending time with him, and how important he is to you. See what he says. If he agrees with you and enjoys your company just as much, chances are, you are both "dating". He just hasn't come out and officially asked you, that's all. He might just assume you know that you're dating... you know some guys. They think it but don't say it. Girls are more apt to share feelings and things about commitment. Good luck!
2007-10-17 02:07:00 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you're already at third base, so it puzzles me why taking it back to first would intimidate you. Yeah, though, ask him out on date things. If you're that worried about it, don't officially call it a date. If the romance angle is mutual, that will be pretty obvious in the way he acts there.
2007-10-17 02:24:22 · answer #5 · answered by Baron Hausenpheffer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hiya.
My guess is that you should throw some points or hints at him to test see if you get the reply/information back that you might require.
Or if it bothers you quite a bit just confront him, ask if we have something or is it a sexual relationship, what's the worst that can happen? I'm sure if he is a decent guy he will understand you are just being curious and give you the answer you require.
2007-10-17 02:05:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you're already having sex with him, he either only wants you for sex (hopefully not the case), thinks you are his girlfriend, or is confused himself (which means you should help him clarify it).
Don't be worried whether you're going to offend him. You have a life too, and you have a right to know whether you're wasting your time. If you just want to have sex, then I'd say fine, who cares, go for it. But if you want to know what's going on, it's not going to happen by osmosis. You have to ask.
2007-10-17 02:05:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he takes you out (I'm assuming he pays?) and has let you meet his friends says that you are more to him than just a physical thing. It's so cliche to have "the talk" about where your relationship stands but I think you may need to.
2007-10-17 02:05:28 · answer #8 · answered by RockabillyBanana 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
while I wouldn't say that it's wrong, I will say that I think that you two need to talk about what you feel you are whether you're seeing each other and dating or just friends with benefits....if you don't ask you'll never know and just assume and that can cause issues with ANY relationship....communication is the key no matter what!!....
2007-10-17 02:11:20 · answer #9 · answered by amyhwoods 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very mature question i must say....
Well, I take it otherway around......If at all he has introduced you to his friends he is serious about your relationship....if it was just sex for him he would have never wasted time after dinner with his friends....
It is possible that he is also going through the same confuision.....why don't you discuss this with him ? Tell him clear cut what is going through your mind.....!!! He will 1001% like your openness.....Goodluck.
2007-10-17 02:15:35 · answer #10 · answered by AA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋