should i listen to what he says?

Question

My boyfriends name is Lewis, everyone calls him Lou for short. He is the 3rd and if we have a son he says he wants the son to be Lewis the 4th. I, however, hate this name and do not want my son and my husband having the same name. He says no matter what thats the name he is giving his son. He said if we have a daughter I can pick the name but if it is a boy then it will be the 4th. Is this fair for him to do that ? ? I know it's a family tradition but shouldn't I have a say in it ? ?

Answer 1

Whats his middle name? Maybe you could allow him to have that name but call your son by his middle name instead of Lewis?

Answer 2

I'm going to have a similar problem, IF I have a boy that is. I don't mind my husband's name, it's rarely heard and most people think it's great, I just never agreed with naming a child after a parent (ego). I don't mind the tradition that my husband's family has had for 4 generations- same first /last name, different middle, and go by middle name. The problems are the following: 1) they all go by the first name once they become adults 2) I have hyphenated my last name and hoped my kids would do the same. My husband doesn't want the boy to be hyphenated. I would love to have a boy but almost would rather have girls so we don't have to deal with this!

Answer 3

If you really hate the name, then compromise. But think about how important it is to your boyfriend. It's a long - standing tradition in the family that he really cares about, and you would be the one to break it.
My son is a junior. To be quite honest, I HATED his middle name, which is Lance. I suggested we give him a different middle name. Hubby agreed and was supportive, but I could tell he was a bit disappointed. So, I changed my mind and much to my husband's delight, I agreed to give my son his full name. I've grown to love the name Lance as a middle name with my son's first name; it flows really beautifully.
Of course you should have a HUGE say in what your child is named, but remember the baby is half his, too. If you could never grow to love the name Lewis, then that's fine. But again, keep your boyfriend's feelings in mind - he's going to be raising the child, too. Just as a thought, you could use your boyfriend's middle name as a first name, and Lewis as the middle name.
It's great that you have started thinking about these things before you get pregnant! I hope you'll both come to a decision before you try to conceive. Good luck!

Answer 4

If worse comes to worst and it has to be Lewis as the first name, make everyone from day one call that child "Lewis", not Lou or Lew. They should refer to him as Lewis, talk to him as Lewis. Lou is so 'Chicago gang' sounding. Not to mention less than middle class. Let your husband chew on that for a while.

Answer 5

My husbands name was Edward the 3rd I gave my son the name Edward Anthony and always called him Tony each Edward had a different middle name but at the hospital they told me he is not Edward the 4 and I said yes he is and kept the name Edward Anthony 4 ______ on the birth certifiate so yes do Lewis and what name you want for a middle name and call him the middle name

Answer 6

Maybe there's a way to compromise...what if you named him Lewis the 4th and agreed to compromise on the middle name, and address your son by his middle name?

He'd still be Lewis the 4th...but day to day you'd call him the compromise middle name...just a thought.

Answer 7

I am all for family traditions unfortunately, I grew up with a Junior, Senior and a Third. We never really got them confused at all even though they all went by the same name. We also had three girls of the same name. Why not call him by his middle name if that is a name you like better? I am not saying you shouldn't have a say in it at all, but if you really wanted a name that he didn't like, wouldn't you push hard for it too?

Answer 8

Of course you have a say in it. It will be YOUR baby too. I understand where he's coming from but your child's name shouldn't be one you hate and he loves. It should be a compromise. Ask if you can try to incorporate Lewis as the middle name. Good luck!

Answer 9

I have a boy and I wanted to give him my name but The wife at the time did not want to. We compromised with the same letter of the first name, the same middle name and of course my last name. Now that I have sole custody of my kids, I wished I would have pushed the same name.

Answer 10

I understand that he wants to 'keep it in the family', then again, it's your child too. So compromise, if you have a boy, use Lewis as a middle name.