As well as the "family" section?
I've only ventured to ask a few questions in these sections, even though I would like to ask more, because of this. While most people are pretty decent, I'll usually get between 3-5 really nasty answers, often involving name calling, or extreme views like my partner should have his son taken away from him for living with someone outside of marriage. Why does this stir up so much anger? Is it just religious right thing? Residual anger left over from their parent's own seperation?
And has anyone else experienced this?
2007-10-16 11:10:01 · 10 answers · asked by Priscilla B 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
In general ,I have noticed people can be openly hostile in any section, primarily due to the fact their comments are anonymous. All people want to have their position or their situation respected but some people seem to think that respect should only travel in their direction.I haven't personally been attacked in my questions or answers (at least I don't take offence to any commments)Why do people show their ignorance.......simply because they can. Ignore them and you'll enjoy the site.Take care.
2007-10-16 15:24:54 · answer #1 · answered by gussie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not see any reason to be rude toward you for being part of an unmarried couple,but I am opposed to these kind of relationships. I just cannot imagine giving years of my life to someone and not having the rights of a legal wife.Some people say you have the same rights being a commom law wife,but I recently read that in all cases this is not so. Also,in general,living with someone for years on end and not being married to that person would just eat at my self esteem.I would feel,,I am acting like a wife in every way,but to this person,I am not good enough to marry.Especially,if the person had been married before,I would think,I desreve a wedding also.Obviously I am better in all ways the the ex,as you are still with me,years down the line,and not with her.
I believe in watching out for my best interests also.If something does happen,and we do break up,chances are that being a woman,I would be left off worse financially,and no court in the land would hear my case,as alimony etc.would not be due me.
If I have any daughters this is not what I want to teach her.I want to be a role model to her,and teach her to value herself.
My feeling if a guy says he loves you,after a certain period of time,he should put a ring on my finger.No pushing out his babies,cooking,and cleaning for him like a wife would do,without a marriage certificate,that says I am indeed his wife.It is a self respect issue,and I want to teach my daughter to always be respectful toward herself.
Plus,I think children in a relationship should know they have parents who are married and not just living together.Not that a piece of paper can make you any more secure,but for those who do get married.it is an important extra step,to show you are serious about doing the one thing,that legally shows you have legally laid down a strong foundatiion,and not just given lip service.When you stand up in front of family and friends during marriage and exchange vows,you are also coming forth to a community of people to cement your partnersship.
Well those are my reasonings and feelings. I realize every one has to decide what is right for them.so while I have my opinion,yours is no less valid,if you differ..Both sides need to keep an open mind,on this topic.
2007-10-17 14:48:05 · answer #2 · answered by glad you asked 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get hit from both sides. Meaning that I have been with the same man for many years and we have a child together, we are not married, and he is several years my senior. The fact that he is so much more older than I is what people seem to have more of a problem with. I wish it wasn't so. Life would be nice if people didn't judge on age, sex, and marriage status alone. As long as your partner is involved in his sons life and performs the duties that come with being a "parent" then it shouldn't matter what others say or think.
2007-10-16 18:28:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
They are stupid. If everyone had their kids taken away for living with someone outside of marriage there would be thousands of orphanages overflowing with children from every race, every city and state in this country. The first guy was right- it is ignorance. Would they rather have a child live with a single parent or a child live with both parents where maybe the father beat the mother and child on a daily basis? Do they think that would be the better choice- having 2 parents in the home or 1 parent and grow up in a loving home? Ignore them.
2007-10-16 18:21:15 · answer #4 · answered by wrjones559_1999 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I have not had that to happen but If it did I would think that the person/persons were rude! Ask me - If I can help I will! I am divorced and have been happily together with my Fiance for the last 10 years- We have 3 kids together in all that are very well adjusted and great people overall! Would never judge another no matter what b/c that is what we have taught them! 1- is 14 (mine) 1- is 7 (ours) 1 is 26 (his sis, she has Downs) I think that love is love and a commitment is commitment - and a piece of paper is just that a paper! But that is me! I love my guy and do want his last name but I do not think we are less b/c I do not have it as of now!
2007-10-16 18:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by T J 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As with each section on here, you have to weed through the BS in order to get a few good answers. Most people do not even bother to actually answer the question, they just give you their opinion.
2007-10-16 19:18:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not in this section about that subject but people are mean on here because they have hateful souls and no matter if they are married or not they are still going down when they die because the evil is there.
2007-10-16 20:03:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
there's a different breed of holier-than-thou nastiness in the pregnancy & parenting section.
i've been told i should have my baby immediately taken from me upon its birth because i plan to go back to work & put it in day care (so that i can actually keep a roof over our heads & food in our mouths)
2007-10-16 18:28:56 · answer #8 · answered by Ember Halo 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
religion is the only reason i can think that people would act that way, but if they want to represent their views in a way that affects other then critisim and anger are the WRONG way to go about it.
2007-10-16 18:18:37 · answer #9 · answered by *ae* 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
dont take it personally. they have no right to judge you. my parents arent together, and havent been for most of my life and i dont have any hostility toward people with a situation like yours. it could be religious, but it could just be ignorance.
2007-10-16 18:15:04 · answer #10 · answered by honestydoesntglitter 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋