How do I let my girlfriend know she is NOT going to heaven?

Question

We have been dating, and there is no question we would be engaged by now if she wasn't so stubborn about accepting the gospel into her heart. This is one of her few weak traits. She is very gracious and giving, you wouldn't even know she was an atheist by just talking to her.

I really need to let her know in a heart to heart that I think she is going to hell.

Any suggestions on how to bring up this topic? I may be a warrior for Christ, but I do wish to use a "sword of mercy" in this case.

Answer 1

Take your little sword of mercy and show her how naughty the devil can be.

Answer 2

When you say she is "stubborn" about accepting the gospel, do you mean that she knows that you are a "Warrior for Christ", already? Surely, she already knows that you think she is going to hell.
IS there a "sword of mercy" we can use in cases like this?
How merciful is God toward her, that He has already provided the Way for her, if she will only take it?
How merciful do you think He will be if she continues to be stubborn?
Obviously, this is a major issue. When two people are at variance concerning something that is so heart-deep, it is inevitable that, no matter what else they may have in common, any relationship between them is doomed from the beginning.
Have you considered what it would be like if you have children with someone who, no matter how gracious she is, is a firm atheist? Can you even imagine the dinner-table conversation...
And suppose she objects to your "brainwashing" HER children?
I don't know of any way to bring this topic up gently...but bring it up you MUST, before your relationship goes any farther.
I know how very difficult this must be for you...believe me, you have this old lady's sincere prayers...

Answer 3

I'm sure that if you read your bible you'll simply come across all kinds of scripture's that you can write down chapter and verse, the Word of God is what does the convincing, for the Word of God is quick and powerful even as a two edged sword, piercing to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit the intentions of the heart. For the most merciful way go to 1Corinthians chapter 13. for starters (living bible) or modern English bible (something easy for her to understand) but also remember how the Holy Spirit convicted you of your sin, did you really need it all spoon fed to you? I know I didn't, also see if you can find where Paul went to a city with a fellow christian and found an alter standing (to the unknown God) so he introduced them to that God as the one they already worship. Also if I were you I really wouldn't be thinking of marrying her yet until she does accept Jesus into her heart or you two will fight about your children's belief's, do you really want your children seeing things her point of view? or would you want both of you to work together in training up your children in the way they should go, worshiping and serving God? because what if she never ever does accept Jesus, then what?.

Answer 4

Go find someone from your church that has already been convicted charged and set free. I know what your girlfriend is going through because I am just as stubborn as she is about sticking by my beliefs. You can't convince her that she isn't going to heavan because you aren't the judge of that. And since she doesn't believe in God, convincing her that she is going to hell is a real waste of time too. Let it go. The only hope you have of keeping her is to tell her that you will love her and respect her no matter what she believes. You love her for more than her beliefs, right? Are your beliefs all that you are? You are torturing her for nothing! Even if I could give you some sort of spell, she would have to be a willing soul. Use your sword to cut your ties not to cut her heart out and transplant it with one that better suits your needs.

Answer 5

If she wasn't a Christian in the first place, I don't know why you started dating her. You shouldn't be using a relationship as a tool for witnessing to someone. That's really messed up. You are playing with her emotions and you are actually playing with your own as well. Scripture states plainly that you shouldn't be unequally yoked. The longer this goes on, the more pain that you are going to be going through. I went through 5 years of this, and I promise you it won't get any better. You cannot force someone to accept the gospel. You can only present it to them and then let God do the rest of the work. It is now up to him. Allow HIM to work.

Answer 6

it would be nice to know how old you are... however ....
lets imagine that you are... lets say 23....
as a 23 year old girl she is a free thinking person and is no longer a child. She dosent need to be told what to believe; she has been told what to believe her entire life...As an atheist, she might never have even considered your religion whenever she began going out with you...you shouldnt think of hers as a flaw in your relationship... If you cant be mature enough to set these differences aside, you might as well break up.

Being a "warrior for christ" is really a scary thing to say!! it freaks the hell out of me...

Answer 7

Tell her this story.

A man has a best friend who contacts a rare blood disease and the only thing that will save him is blood transfusions. Yet, the problem is the friend has a very rare blood type.

So as the friend grows increasing weaker, the man who has been trying to find someone who had that same blood type is exhausted and frustrated because he was not able to find any blood donors and his friend was getting worse by the day.


The man went home after visiting his friend in the hospital and while he was relaxing in his easy chair, his son came to him and asked him why he was so sad.

He told his son that his good friend was going to die unless he could find someone who would give their blood to him.

The son asked the Father why he couldn't give his blood. It just so happened the son's blood was the same rare blood as the friend.

The man told his son he was to small to give blood.

In the mean time, the friend became increasing worse and the man began feeling a sense of emergency. So he asked the doctors what would be the odds of his son giving blood and coming through it alright.

The doctors told him that if the son was healthy, they seen no reason why he could not donate some of his blood.


So the man brought his son in and the doctors gave him an exam. They then took him into a room where they began taking some of his blood. It was just down the hall from the friend.

After about thirty minutes, the doctor came out and told the man he did not understand what had just happened. He told the man that as they were taking blood from his son, his heart stopped and they could not get it started again.

The man rushed into the room where his son was and with tears running down his face, he caressed his son's still warm body.

He happened to gaze over and he seen the rack holding the blood his son gave to save his friend.

He took the blood and went to his friends room and said, "Look, here is the blood you need to keep you alive."

The man was delirious and swung at the man, hitting his arm causing him to drop the bags of blood onto the floor where they burst open.

The man yelled at his friend and said, " What have you done? My son just gave his life giving blood so that you can live and you have just knocked it onto the flood. Now you have no hope."




The moral of the story is how God sent his Son down to earth to shed his blood for all mankind and how men reject it.

Answer 8

Firstly, you can't make a generalization about someone based on their religious beliefs (or lack thereof). It doesn't mean someone is mean and nasty just because they are an Athiest.

Secondly, you can tell her she is going to Hell, but if she doesn't believe in Hell it wont do any good. Enjoy her while you're both on the earth, because this is the reality NOW. I am an atheist, but if you are a Christian, then it wont matter where she goes because all you need is God. You wont need her in your "life" anymore because you'll be in Heaven and have no more attachment to earthly beings.

Answer 9

Well, she already knows she's not going to heaven since she doesn't believe in it. Also, how DARE you call being atheist a 'weak' trait and how DARE you insinuate that atheists are not gracious or giving people.

That aside;
If I were you I'd leave it alone. If she wanted to be converted, she would be. Since she obviously does not wish to be converted, you have to either learn to accept it or move on and find someone with the same values as you. Simple as that.

Answer 10

I think there might well be a more tactful way than saying that she's going to hell. Make clear your beliefs. Tell her you believe in God and Christ and that he came to save us from hell. And that you need her to understand that you couldnt marry someone who doesnt believe this too. Because if she can't understand and agree with your beliefs, and you realization that heaven and hell and God and the devil are real, then you might not be able to move forward.
Maybe instead of telling her shes going to hell, consider telling her that you know if you intentionally sin, and refuse to repent of that sin, that you are confident that you would go to hell. Thats why you try and live a holy life and live your life for Jesus. I would try taking away the focus from her and put it on you. If she comes back asking if you think she's going to hell, then just tell her that you think she needs Jesus.
Then again, maybe the answer is just to agree to disagree. You know the Bible says that a man and a wife in bed and the rapture happens and one will be left behind. Do you want to do that to her? Or even still, do you plan on having kids? Do you want to risk them not believe in Jesus? I think you should pray about this. follow God's leading.

Answer 11

Tell her that if she accepts the gospel, she can be smug and condescending toward others, just like you.

How about instead of badgering her, you take some time to think about what poison you have been taught? The theology of damnation of the good, and salvation of the evil, based on no more than a belief in one thing vs. another, is a cruel theology, and requires a cruel and unyielding god.

btw -- Unless she's really dumb, she already knows you think she's going to hell.