Offended a Christian collegue?

Question

I work with a woman who is quite Christian, and talks about God and her beliefs quite often in the office. I generally avoid discussing such taboo topics at work. When she heard from another co-worker that I am Athiest, she opted to confront me (kindly) about my lack of belief in God. Not wanting to continue the uncomfortable conversation, I simply told her that I have nothing against her choice of religion, but I personally find organized religion dangerous and choose not to follow. She was severely offended (?) and, from what I hear, is planning to report me to HR....what exactly did I do wrong here?

No, LOL, I'm not a police officer. I am a lobbyist against Breed Specific Legislation ( pit stands for 'Pit Bull')...I hang out in the dogs section most of the time.

Answer 1

Keep good records of your interaction on this subject, with dates, and who was present and what was said.

From your description, she is not only at fault, but has stepped over the ethical line. You have to keep the moral high ground now, by doggedly following the rules. If she tries to get a black mark against you on your record simply for being honest about your religious beliefs - when she instigated things - she is violating your civil rights.

Do NOT confront her about this. No-one there should be pushing religion or atheism on anyone else, and as long as she is the one who brought it up, she's the one at fault, and you're on firm moral and legal ground. Don't give away your standing by committing the same mistake she did.

I take it from your username that you work for a police department, which is of course a government agency. They are prevented by the First Amendment of the Constitution from holding your atheism against you.

Answer 2

Hi Rachel! If HR really does get involved, they'll probably just talk to you *both* and request you leave your spiritual beliefs at home.

The office is no place to discuss religion (or lack thereof). This also includes references to religion in email signatures, etc. (i.e. "Best wishes" instead of "Blessings", no biblical passages or stuff like that) The office is no place for her to ask you anything about your beliefs, but is also no place for you to share yours.

You wrote that your coworker shares her beliefs often in the office. How did the other coworker learn that you are atheist?

Anyways, don't worry too much about HR. In the future if personal beliefs are brought up at work, opt to decline discussion on the grounds that you choose to keep your work a place for.....work.

Answer 3

From what you say, it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. In fact the opposite is true, she was in the wrong for not discontinuing the discussion once you said you were uncomfortable with it.

I understand how zealous people can be and all, In fact I admire it too an extent, but I do not appreciate it when there is a perception that they have a right to intrude on my beliefs and that is the approach I take when talking to people about religious maters.

“If the stone you throw keeps hitting you, maybe it is time to put down the rock.”

Answer 4

You did absolutely nothing wrong. Your employer doesn't pay to sit around and discuss religion. It was your co-worker that was out of line and should check her religion at the office door.....it has no place in the workplace.
If I were you I'd just sit tight and wait and see if there is going to be any fallout. If you do get hauled into HR (i doubt it) don't let them bully you; you are entitled to your opinion and if your co-worker didn't like your comments that's too bad for her...she shouldn't have brought it up. Remind your HR rep of your employer's duty to provide a harassment-free workplace.

Answer 5

What an awful work environment you have. I'm sure the word "dangerous" offended her. That's your opinion and she brought it up, but you did say she was kind. You probably could have been kinder and just said let's agree to disagree. Also, why is your other co-worker discussing your "beliefs"? What right did that person have telling anyone you are an atheist? I'd talk to your boss. Let him/her know about the gossip and disruptive conversations taking place.

Answer 6

I am a Christian and I will tell you that you have done no wrong.
If she was offended, then that is her problem.

Planning to report you to H.R. ?! Ridiculous !

Most Christians mean well when they defend their faith. But, too often, many make fundamental errors when dialoguing with atheists. We need to make as few errors as possible, not simply to win an argument, but to help the atheist come to a saving relationship with the Lord Jesus.

Tell Her this ok ?



That Pride is a harmful thing. It caused the fall. It ruins marriages. It leads to anger and self-righteousness. It has no place in the Christian's life. Never admitting you are wrong is being prideful. If an atheist, or anyone, proves you wrong is something, be kind and courteous. Admit you made a mistake and go on. Everyone makes mistakes, even atheists. There is nothing wrong with admitting an error. It no more proves you are wrong about Christianity than being wrong about the color of a boat means boats don't exist. But, if you never admit when you are wrong, you will not be able to convince anyone in a discussion of your position.

Answer 7

I don't think you did anything wrong, she confronted you and you answered truthfully. If she was offended that is really too bad but if she can voice her religious beliefs so can you! She can go to HR but what can they do about it? You can't fire someone for their religious beliefs, that would be ILLEGAL.

It would be best to try and let the situation go, don't discuss it with other co-workers. If you care about maintaining a good working relationship with this particular co-worker you could tell her that you are sorry if you offended her but that you respect her beliefs and that you would appreciate it if she could respect yours.

Answer 8

You did nothing wrong. She is the one that approached you about your beliefs. Let her report you to HR, because she will be the one to get in trouble. Freedom of religion means freedom to believe in any religion you choose or in no religion at all. Some people feel that what they believe in is the only right belief and they can't accept that other peple do not believe in what they do or share their same beliefs.

Answer 9

And that's when I'd report her for attacking me for my religious beliefs and offending me and my religion. The street runs both ways, however, she started it.

You did nothing wrong, but I would have simply stated that I don't talk about religion at work. Unless you're Utah, she's got no complaint. (In Utah, the system would support the Mormon take on the issue.)

I'd use this as an opportunity to end her preaching at work all together.

Answer 10

ha ha - that's funny. In a lot of owrk environments, discussing religion, asking someone what they are, pushing your religion on them is actually against the law (you cannot be discriminated against based on your religion). I sure hope she DOES go to HR- because she will be the one that gets a written warning and/or possibly fired!!

if you went to HR and said that you felt harrassed by this woman because of your religious belief is different from yours and stated that she confronted you and harrassed you she would most likely be fired. It's a good thing that SHE is going to HR - not you!

Lawsuit is what HR is going to see - in bright NEON orange!