My house is so untidy most of the time. I have 3 small children aged 6 mths, 2 yrs and a 7 yr old, plus 2 dogs and 3 cats (I love animals) I live with so much junk i feel unable to throw away and theres piles of junk everywhere. I feel too embarressed to let people over, because they're going to think i'm a lazy grot, when the truth is that i dont sit down all day, i'm always cleaning, or tending to the little ones. my yard is a mess because of the dogs (one of them is a naughty husky- the amount of hair she loses is incredible, its all over the yard, its everywhere,). My partner tells me to just relax, but if i dont clean, then no one will. How do people organise a house? What do i keep? What do i throw out? How do i stop my animals from stinking the place up? I've lost so much weight, I barely get time to eat, i'm just cleaning all the time and getting absolutely nowhere. HELP! No one elses house is like mine i'd appreciate any suggestions/handy tips...
2007-10-15 18:30:09 · 10 answers · asked by bahl 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I am sorry for your pain--you sound so distressed. I think with kids things do get messy if you don't get a lot of help.
Please realized I'm not a psychologist, but I think you might be a hoarder. These are people who save things, become attached to them, and cannot toss anything. It's a disorder based on fear--fear of losing oneself, I think, and no trust in the future (scarcity might come). Get a grip on your fear.
Have you seen those junk sorting and cleaning shows on TV?
They sort things this way: toss, give away, keep. Keep only things you ACTUALLY use or you have used in the last 6 months. Be brutal and toss all the junk. Get yourself several rolls of Hefty bags. Start tossing. Don't let yourself think about sentimental or some minimal monetary value. You don't want your life cluttered with junk, I can see you've come to realize that. And you sure don't want your kinds to be hoarders! Maybe have a trusted friend help you sort and toss. SOmeone who keeps you in check in terms of what is junk, what you can get rid of. You will feel lighter and happier when you heal yourself, get over your fear and toss excessive junk. Trust in your future, believe good things are in store--not JUNK!
If nobody else helps, consider giving away some of the pets to caring homes. I don't see you can do it all yourself. Each pet is like another kid, and it's a lot of work--maybe too much. I wish you the best in your new life.
2007-10-15 18:41:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same way sometimes - I only have 2 daughters 5 & 7 but we have just bought a beautiful new house and I have had to go back to work 3 days per week. This means I spend my 2 days off cleaning, buying groceries and cooking but everything doesn't get done.
I always start buy taking out the rubbish and cleaning the floor - this gives the house the appearance of being clean.
I love to get rid of things - anything you haven't used for a while must go.
Also, get your 7 year old to clean up their own mess and try to keep the baby's toys in one area.
can you keep the animals outside?
Ask your partner if you can get a cleaner and some help for the yard just once and then it should be easier to maintain.
2007-10-17 15:11:21 · answer #2 · answered by L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of the dogs and cats at least for now. Get a routine. I had 3 under 4 so I know how difficult it can be. Get your partner to help, more if he helps already.
I think the enormity of the situation has got to you.
Perhaps go out go to the park, the beach, lake or a lovely open space, meet your friends there if you doin't want them in your home.
DO NOT stay in all day, sure the mess will be there when you get back, but you will have escaped it and hasd some time out.
Do you have "me" time, I think you neeed it, a bath, a shop, a walk on your own get your partner to look after the kids they are his as well. (I assume) It does get easier and better. But you have too much on your plate and I think youneed to seriously think about the numbers of animals you have. How can you walk 3 kids and 2 dogs? You are not Superman you are a mum doing her best, call in favours honey you need a break.
Good luck.
2007-10-15 21:43:34 · answer #3 · answered by Elizabeth L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl your family is running you wild!
I have 3 kids (like you), 2 dogs (like you) and 3 cats (like you). My house is clean and tidy, do you know why? I make others get involved. I make it clear it is not MY house but OUR house. They are not allowed to walk in and trash it....they have to hang up coats, put away shoes, backpacks, etc.
Get a cleaning routine and stick with it. First, sweep all hard floors into the carpet. Vaccum and mop with hot water and detergent. Now pick up the rest of the house. Do laundry everyday, clean up bathrooms daily with a swish of bleach and a brush, wipe mirrors.
The essential part is reminding hubby and kids that they have to DO THEIR SHARE. Hubby is responsible for trash, kitty pans and litter, dogs and yard. Everyday he has to check them. Son is responsible for food and water. Simple and something you can pay them a few cents a day for.
DON'T focus on cleaning, cleaning, cleaning to where you're spending your whole day fixing what your family messed up. Make your house work for you, not the other way around. Spend one hour (no less, no more) a day cleaning up, then leave it be. Once everyone gets involved it will be okay!
About hoarding and messes- if you haven't used it in a month- put it away in a bin. If you haven't used it in 6 months, you will never use it- toss it. You don't need as much stuff as you think you do.
Good luck and god bless!
2007-10-15 21:10:59 · answer #4 · answered by Lynn A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was in the same situation.now is a good time to teach the 2 yr old to clean up after him/her self. its better to start early. the 7 year old should be helping mommy. when my daughter was that age she did alot to keep me sain. i have a 5yr old 9 yr old and a 13 yr old. they all now clean up after themselves and have chores. my daughter 9 does the dinner dishes and sweeps the floor and my son 5 sets the table and wipes it when diner is done. give the 7 year old some responsability and a little cash for it never hurts.....you will find the longer they do it and the more new experiances they get they love it....my daughter was begging me to teacher her to do laundry so that is what we r working on now....the kids can be a help not just a pain.its all in how you handle it. and for the animals i have a pittbull (hyper) 1 inside cat which just had 4 kittens so i got 6 animals runnuin my house as long as you let the dogs out when their supposed to and keep the litter box clean you should be ok. it also helps to have them all fixed. then they dont spray. and also they have spray at pet stores that attract an animal to pee in a certain spot and a spray to spray in the house so they dont pee in there. they use their sense of smell for alot.
2007-10-15 19:09:04 · answer #5 · answered by reneesim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick it out until you get a job or go away to college - it might be tough, but living on your own and fending for yourself at 16 would be harder than living at home. Can you get a Saturday/weekend job in a shop? I used to work on a market stall selling cheap jewellery from 15 until I left home - it meant I earned enough money to have a bit of freedom. I can relate to what you're going through - I've been there (OK so it was in the 1980s, but time hasn't changed all that much)- I couldn't wait to leave home when I went away to college, and at 18 I was ready for the move - I couldn't have coped at 16. You know when you do finally move out and gain your independence, your family will become much more attractive - and you might even enjoy spending some time with them! Good luck.
2016-04-09 02:59:10 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to clean out. Take it one room at a time. Be ruthless. The less you have in your house the less cluttered it looks. If it is that hard to get rid of stuff it may be possible that you have OCD. Unclutter is the key. I beleive there are people that can help
2007-10-15 19:31:30 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Flylady.net and buy the book "Sink Reflections" by Marla Cilley. It has saved millions of people's lives from clutter and chaos in the home!
2007-10-18 04:39:16 · answer #8 · answered by Amy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU SHOULD GIVE YOUR DOGS AWAY IT SEEMS YOU NEED A LOT OF MORE TIME FOR YOURSELF AND THE KIDS .. PLAY ACTIVITIES WITH THE KIDS SO YOU CAN GET YOUR HOUSE CLEAN TRY TO CLEAN SECTIONS BY SECTIONS AND DON'T LET YOUR KIDS CLOSE TO IT OR LOCK YOUR ROOMS JUST TRY TO BE IN ONE PLACE TILL YOU GET YOUR HOUSE ALL CLEANED UP
2007-10-19 17:42:25 · answer #9 · answered by baby Joel due 4-5-09 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your are living in CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) See this website:
www.flylady.com
You are note alone:
http://www.channel4.com/4homes/ontv/how_clean_is_your_house/index.html
Other information:
http://understanding_ocd.tripod.com/hoarding.html
http://www.sciencentral.com/articles/view.php3?type=article&article_id=218392362
Throw away things you don't need.
Do one room at a time--focus.
2007-10-15 18:57:40 · answer #10 · answered by writer's block 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋