My son is driving me nuts... hes 16 will he forever think I'm a horrible mom?

Question

He is so rebelious and talks down at me.. I cant stand it! HELP!

Is there a father... not really, I have basically raised him up myself. And yes I do tell him I love him.. He just dont get it... Im the one in charge.. not him. blah... Thanks for all the help!!! I will do what ever it takes... I brought him into this world, I will finish the job.. I just hope it doesnt kill me!

Answer 1

Why does this surprise you?
You cannot be best friends with your children.
You have to be the parent, which means you must use every method at your disposal to instill the values in your children that will help them to be successful in life. They cannot navigate our society without morals, ethics, responsibility and respect.

If that means instilling respect by means of a well aimed slap on the face or a doubled-up belt across their behinds, then so be it. If you have to take away their computer, I-pod or video game, that is fine, too. If you have to ground them, that is fine as well. You do what you must to get the point across.

You provide for all of their needs, so while they are under your roof, the kids must obey your rules. They must go to school, keep their grades up, do their homework, pick up after themselves and do whatever chores you ask of them. If they will not comply, the door is that-a-way. You have to handle these little insurrections hard and fast.

Your new mantra is, “If the mama ain’t happy, then NOBODY is happy.” The mama is the ultimate authority. You must step into your power as such.

You only have 2 years to teach this kid what he needs to know.

Answer 2

Do the words I love you ever come into play or do you just argue and try to order him around as my own mother did.

I had 7 brothers and the problems the 4 older brothers had made the rules tougher on me and the other 3.
But a kid dosen't need to have all the added problems I had to feel like he's being smothered in parental do's and don't's.

My favorite saying was that I didn't ask to be born.
What was yours.
Heh heh heh

All kids want is more freedom and all parent's usually want is to protect them so take a good look at your self and your youth and then at your son and his and see if you can't figure him out.

What does he want that he feels you are keeping him from.

Answer 3

This is from a teen point of view, he'll be rebelious. I started bein rebelious at 14. Well, one way to understand him is, if he likes anythin, NEVER TEASE IT!! Try to be intune with all the latest things. Talk to him as a friend not a mum! When you want him not to something, tell him & reason with him. We teens juz wanna know why & some respect. When you do this, he'll giv you some respect!! I hope you become a good mum!! ^_^

Answer 4

does he have a father that lives with u both?and if he continues to be this way with u , then its time u show him what a beautiful life he will have without u. u cant let him get away with his actions or verbal abuse towardsu it will only make things worse when he grows up. so what i suggest is that u set him straight . do u provide a good life for hom etc. well if u do start taking aeay some of those gifts u have given him and let him know why. he will pout and act even worse but u have to stop hes behaviour somehow.if u need help please feel free to email me at ,,, [e-mail] i was once like ur son and i still feel bad about the things i did to my mother because all she ever wanted wasfor me to have a good life like u want for ur son .god bless u

Answer 5

Guh, all 16year olds do that. 16 is an age that is characterized, if not defined by a certain loneliness inherent in the post-adolecence. Plus, every teenager thinks that their parents are old fogeys. Sex alcohol drugs are all working their way into his social scene, in one degree or another. You seem concerned, so I would wager that youve given him the neccessary tools to deal with a stresful environment- and to develop a sincere appreciation for you in the next few years.

Answer 6

No - almost all teenagers nowdays do this to their parents, because we live in a society that constantly tells teens that they are victims, and gives them countless reasons not to take responsibility for their own lives and actions. Unfortunatley, parents are an easy target. Two of my sisters did this to my mother for years, and she was/is the greatest, most wonderful mom ever.
You know if you've been a good mother or not. Just ignore all his hateful words...
He'll get over himself, and if he has a conscience, he'll spend his twenties trying to make up for it.

Answer 7

Tell him that you love him but you will not put up with no more. Set some rules and stand buy them no matter what. If he don't like it then maybe he needs to stay some place else. It is time for him to grow up and start acting like a young man that he is.

Answer 8

I raised 3 girls by myself, so I know what your saying. Believe it or not, he won't hate you forever. Try sitting down with him, (almost impossible). DO NOT YELL. Talk quietly about your concerns. Listen to his concerns. Many times if you treat him with respect, but firmness, things might change. Don't talk down to him. In the end, exasberating as it is, he will love you and remember things you've taught him.

Answer 9

Well, you better do like my momma pull out the damn belt and bust his 16 yr old a** that will teach him. OR mabey his angry about something thats going on and may need counsuling or attention. Does he have a father around? their could be so many things contributing to his behavior.

Answer 10

well this is what i was told..yer 16 now if ya think yer man enough, get out of my house if ya don't like the rules..you think your a horrible mom? if you give in it just adds to the brats arsenal ,,he can't see that he has it good ..food ,bed ,ect....tell the idiot to shape up or get out