OK, so my wife & I had my parents & my sister over - we bought a brand new nice couch from American Furniture about 4 months ago. NO ONE is allowed food or drink on our couch (we don't even eat on it ourselves). My mom wanted a drink of my sister's soda, and my wife told my mom that we don't drink on the couch (which I back my wife up on). My mom said "Oh I'll be careful," and again my wife informed her that we don't drink on the couch. In response, my parents then proceeded to leave, while my dad didn't even say bye to me (though I did to him).
Historically, my parents have a tendency to treat my brother & I (ages 29 & 26, respectively) & our wives as though we're still "kids." I think this little scenario is an example of that; they treated us as though we're not allowed to have our own enforceable rules at our house.
Wouldn't you agree that it was immature of them to leave because they didn't like our rule? Most people would respect our wishes.
2007-10-15 04:18:04 · 21 answers · asked by Devo 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You embarressed them yes, It is your house and your rules, but maybe instead of in front of everyone you could have'd let that go and said at a later time in private that youre trying to be carefull with your furniture and we would appriciate it if you could keep all food and beverages in the kitchen. Even though you are adults, they are still your parents. Show some respect.
2007-10-15 04:53:41 · answer #1 · answered by island girl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, yeah, they were in your house and should follow the house rules just like anyone else.
Of course there are other standard rules about hospitality to guests and respecting the wishes of elders that they could have expected you to apply, too.
So I think it's also sort of immature to have a problem with them leaving over it. I mean, if they weren't going to follow the rules what else could they have done? I suppose a "drink in" on the couch wouldn't have gone over very well, either.
Hopefully after a couple of days to cool down and think about the issue things will settle down and everyone will come to their senses.
2007-10-15 16:05:48 · answer #2 · answered by Critter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparently they haven't come to terms with the fact that you two are grown, respectable young adults with families of your own. They need to realize that it is your own homes and that your home equals your rules. I don't believe those rules to be so harsh, but regardless, they should still respect you enough to abide by them, parents or not. I would certainly understand their actions of walking out so coldly if your wife had been rude in stating that no one was to eat or drink on the couch. But seeing as how they left soon thereafter her saying that, it just seems they were quite offended.
Have you actually sat down with your parents and discussed this behavior with them? It seems quite childish, to be honest. If you have, I think they have quite a bit of growing up to do, and realize that you two aren't just playing house.
Best of luck with that.
2007-10-15 04:26:43 · answer #3 · answered by iammai 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it was immature, but from their point of view, you were pretty rude not to let them drink on your couch. It's your house, your rules apply and they should have respected that, but maybe they thought having a drink on your couch was no big deal? It seems to them as if you worried more about a couch than their own well being. I can see why they would be ticked.
2007-10-15 04:25:43 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suppose that you had to follow rules at your parents' home growing up, and now that you have a home of your own, it's only right for them (and others) to honor your wishes.
My kids weren't allowed drinks anywhere in the house but the kitchen.... and they'd leave their glass on the kitchen table if they had something to drink... and go back and forth to them... it was my rule... i didn't want koolaid, etc., spilled on my carpets and in my living room, and can't blame you either!
take care, and hopefully your parents will grow UP sooner or later.
2007-10-15 04:26:02 · answer #5 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you, your parents should have respected the rules of YOUR house. It sounds like a power trip on your parents part, give them time to get over it, then call them.
2007-10-15 04:24:35 · answer #6 · answered by WVPV07 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not just immature, but also rude! Stand your ground. And if confrounted on it , I would say. If a person ask you not to smoke in their house, do you smoke anyway? Or if I say not to drive my car, do you drive it anyway? " I will be careful !!! " It sounds to me like you were acting like the parent. This is your couch and you make the rules. I'm sure they set rules like this as you were growing up ! Good Luck !!
2007-10-15 04:34:09 · answer #7 · answered by Kay A 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your right. If they bought a new couch, I'm sure they would have the same rule in place and would want you to follow it. Your house, your rules.
2007-10-15 05:35:15 · answer #8 · answered by andy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um yeah they dont respect your home or personal property bc if they did they wouldve been easy going and said ok rather than get all huffy and leave. just let them know their certain rules u have in ur household and it would be a lot easier if they could respect your rules so their no more weird uncomfortable power struggle.
2007-10-15 05:00:39 · answer #9 · answered by spadezgurl22 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If people come into your house they should respect your wishes. Parents will be parents no matter what age you are. They dont see you as a grown man, they see you as their little boy. They will get over it in time, I wouldnt worry too much.
2007-10-15 04:41:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋