If you recently were married, and your sister-in-law was in your wedding, and did not get you a gift or card.. or acknowledged the union.... for your wedding and she is now getting married... would you get anything for her?
This is a two month difference.
2007-10-15 04:09:50 · 26 answers · asked by Anna_Phylactic 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
to answer some questions:
NO she didn't pay for her hair, or dress, or shoes or anything. My father in law did, and i paid for her hair.
and NO i'm not in her wedding, and she only asked my husband (her brother) to be in the party a month ago.
2007-10-15 04:45:07 · update #1
unfortunately, if you don't you will look bad. No one is judging her because she is "blood"...you aren't. Plus she might say you are crazy, and that she didnt buy you anything cause she was broke/saving. SO i would just go with your husband, and get a gift from the 2 of you, sign the card. But you don't have to acknowledge her. Don't say congratulations, Just smile! See how she acts in thet future. Ask your hubby if he notices anything, or if she has said anything. If she still acts the same, its fine, you dont have to talk to her much.
2007-10-15 04:15:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok have you looked at it from her point of view? She is not only in your wedding and paying for the normal bridesmaid things but is also planing and saving to pay for her wedding? Maybe finances are tight and she couldn't afford one?
Plus gifts are not mandatory, that's why there are called gifts. Personally if you can afford to get her something do. She will understand you are in the same boat she was in if you don't.
Remember she not only tying to make sure your day goes well but is also thinking about her day. Maybe she just forgot to you a card. Think about this way... What if your wedding was after hers? Wouldn't you be a little frazzled and on a extremely tight budget?
Best Wishes to you and you new groom.
2007-10-15 04:37:04 · answer #2 · answered by typicalcagirl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is just rude that she didn't give you a gift, especially seeing as she didn't have to pay for anything, what a *****!. You shouldn't normally expect gifts but when she has paid for nothing, that is another case. It doesn't matter if she was saving for her wedding, she could have given you at least a 20 buck gift card. Give her a small, tacky, crappy gift so at least you are better than her. I would love to say don't get her anything but that won't solve anything. She is trash but you are better. Remember that.
2007-10-15 23:26:26 · answer #3 · answered by BTB2211 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly don't think she'll take it as an insult if you don't bring her a gift. In fact, I don't think she cares about how you feel at all. Perhaps you can show some class and at least get her a card that says congratulations. This way you acknowledge her special day but you're not doing something that you'll continue to feel resentful of.
2007-10-15 06:33:37 · answer #4 · answered by Jasmine808 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do whatever you would normally have done and don't base it on her actions. It doesn't serve anyone any good to keep score. It just creates more frustration and tension.
I have a freeloading cousin who shows up to things with her seven kids, takes home leftovers, doesn't bring a dish to potlucks, but rather than frustrate myself over it, I just expect it.
I had a Labor Day BBQ at my house. Everyone brought something. I provided the meat. She brought her hubby, 7 kids and her FATHER IN LAW. She didn't even bring a bag of chips. She went home with two steaks, some veggies, a few brownies, etc.
When I got married, she came with her hubby (who wore jeans) and didn't even give us a card.
Whatever.....
2007-10-15 04:36:55 · answer #5 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did she pay for everything that comes with being a bridesmaid (dress, shoes, hair....etc)?
Are you in her wedding party? If you are, I would get her a card but a very small gift.
2007-10-15 04:13:06 · answer #6 · answered by Jellybean had her little bean 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes of course. One buys a gift for the wedding because she wants to, it's not based on reciprocity.
2007-10-16 02:09:41 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stoop to her level. Be the bigger person. Maybe she was a little pre-occupied with her own wedding.
Don't go all out on a lavish gift, but get her something.
2007-10-15 04:16:58 · answer #8 · answered by Loves the Ponies 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
she may be unaware of wedding etiquette, and thought that members of the wedding party didn't give gifts...
I'd be the more marture person and get her at least a card, and probably a small gift or a gift card.
2007-10-15 04:16:19 · answer #9 · answered by Asked and Answered 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I assume she paid for her outfit and her standing up for you - was her gift. If you are in the wedding I would give a card, if not in the party - then I would give a small gift.
2007-10-15 04:15:51 · answer #10 · answered by JennyJenJen 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋