Well, my parents are FORCING me to go to church until I'm 18, and to be quite honest. I HATE IT. I don't want to go to church, I just wanna be left alone... but since my parents are threatening to cancel comcast internet if I don't go to church once a week, I have no choice. About two months ago we started going to this new church, and I am almost 17. There are alot of teens in this youth class and sometimes I feel like I'm obligated to go to it... but the thing is, I don't even want to be in church in the first place, much less go to some youth class. I only go to church because I have to, the truth is I want to get out of that place ASAP. Not only do I not like church, but I am a little shy and I am a bit worried of what people will think of me, so if I go to that teen class, theres like 20 people I don't even know and I feel a little intimidated... sorry I know it sounds bad, but I shoulden't even have to go to church, I think I am old enough to make my own decisions...
2007-10-15 03:47:37 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
so should I go to the youth class? Or should I stay with the adults? Because I hate church as it is, but why should I even go to the youth class? I mean it does look a little weird, I am the only non-adult with the congregation. By the way, this is a really small church...
And are my parents wrong for forcing me to go to church?
2007-10-15 03:48:45 · update #1
oh btw, I haven't gone to that youth class the two months I've be going to that church, so if i go now won't it be a little bit weird? i mean like, ppl will think "oh so he finally decides to show up..." u kno...
2007-10-15 04:00:50 · update #2
Most parents are smart enough to figure out that a 16 year old already knows if they want to be a part of an organized religion or not.
In fact, most religions have a "confirmation" type ceremony at age 12 that makes a child a full member of a religion and it is assumed that after 12 years old, that (now member) is completely in charge of their own spiritual growth.
I really have to laugh at the comcast threat. It's ridiculous on so many levels- from their threat stance AND from your "fear" of having your precious TV removed. It highlights the immatruity of your parents and their inability to discuss adult topics with you in an adult fashion and it highlights your immaturity as an individual that removing a toy can still put your shorts in a knot.
I think it's time you sat down with Mom and Dad and asked them flat out why it's so very important TO THEM that you attend a group that you do not want to belong to.
THIER "salvation" ( or whatever fear based motivation they have for going to church) is THEIR business. Your BELIEFS exist inside of YOU and you are a seperate human being from them. There are going to be lots of things that you and they feel differently about- music, food, comedy, movies, clothing, who you date, what kind of car is the coolest, what sort of pet to have etc. etc. Religion is not a GENETIC INHERITANCE. It is a belief system that you choose to believe in...or not.
So, may I ask, what happens when you decide to date some one that have the wrong color hair or that your parents don't like or (GASP!) is a different religion from your parents? Will they take away your driving provileges?
Perhaps you should ask your parents at exactly what age would they like you to begin behaving like an adult? 17, 18, 47? When will you have their permission to live your life?
Stand up. And if they still insist on taking your woobie TV away- then lose the TV and HOLD ON TO YOUR BELIEFS.
2007-10-15 04:04:02 · answer #1 · answered by Mimi Di 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Take a step back and look at this situation from the outside. Your parents want you to go to church because they believe you need a good spiritual foundation. It may end up that your beliefs are not the same as your parents and that's OK. You have to be able to form your own opinions. But you won't be able to form your opinions without considering alternative opinions. So think of going to church as a research project. What are they teaching there? Does what they're teaching match what you believe? If not, what are the differences? Then use that information to open up a discussion with your parents, with your peers, with others in the church.
It sounds like your real reason for not wanting to go to the youth group is that you don't know the people in the group. Think of it as 20 potential friends you haven't met yet. Take a little time to get to know them. You may be surprised to find that some of them don't want to be there either. They can learn from you and you can learn from them. And you may just find a few people who turn out to be life long friends. Give it a chance.
Your alternative is to live the next couple of years without Comcast internet. Which is worse?
2007-10-15 11:07:23 · answer #2 · answered by innerradiancecoaching 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are living in your parents' house, they make the rules, and I applaud them for making the rule that you have to go to church. Shame on you for not wanting to. You might actually learn something while you are there, and even make some friends, if you just relax and quit bucking it so hard. Sometimes parents really do know best, and good for them! Yes, you should go to the youth class, because not going makes you look like you think you are too good to hang out with kids your own age. Get over yourself and build a relationship with God--- that is the only thing that is going to get you through this life, anyway! Suck it up!
2007-10-15 10:54:24 · answer #3 · answered by Joy L 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You won't remember but when you first started school you knew nobody, probably.
Personally, for family harmony, for the sake of just over 12 months, I'd go, AND I'd go to the youth group rather than the adults.
You never know, you might find some friends.
BTW I'm not religious either, but its only a couple of hours a week after all...
2007-10-15 10:53:36 · answer #4 · answered by paof2 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to confront your parents and lay down your cards in going to church. Insist in telling them that what's the use of going to church if you don't want it by heart anyways. Well you know going to church doesn't make you a saint and either makes you evil if you dint. Your actions says the last judgement. But,don't forget the fact that you're still your parents child give them due respect when you confront them about this. Bare in mind that every decision that you make has a subsequent implications. I know why you don't want to go to church in the 1st place. you don't know your obligations yet in that new church or religion. If you know by heart how much important this is to your faith or your belief you wouldn't act immaturely like this.
2007-10-15 11:02:01 · answer #5 · answered by deinna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go to church. Don't make it a big deal. It's only one hour a week......and you should go in with the teen group. You will get comfortable the more you go. Your parents are doing what they think is right and trying to lead you in the right direction. Quit fighting them, you are only stressing yourself and your parents out. You'll be out of the house soon.....and can then decide for yourself......but for now sit tight and just do it.
2007-10-15 11:07:27 · answer #6 · answered by Felicia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're 18 and an adult. Move out and get your own place. Pay your own bills. That way no one can force you to do anything you don't want to do. Or let your parents cancel Comcast. Big deal. Act like an adult.
2007-10-15 10:51:57 · answer #7 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in ur shoes a year ago... I am 18 now... So, u can take this as ur future prediction lol...Guess what??? I'm glad that my mum forced me to go for prayers! And today, i can't think of skipping my prayers even for a single day [we're supposed to go daily in our caste] since i'm so attached to the people out there... I made so many friends out there... Yes, initially i did feel left out but eventually I became a familiar face there... So, start going regularly and life will surely change for the better!!! U'll be filled with positive energy!
2007-10-15 10:57:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
So.. your real problem isn't church.. it's that you are afraid the others won't like you. so you would rather sit in the corner and sulk...
Get up off your but and try to make friends.. you are going to be in this same situation the rest of your life...
2007-10-15 11:07:27 · answer #9 · answered by Sophie B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
look it's our obligation to go to church once a week not because of our families but a requirement by God read the bible and you will know why start reading from Genesis up to the part where Moses lead the Israel out of Egypt
2007-10-15 10:56:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋