I am 8 weeks pregnant and it has been a long journey with the babys father. We are not together and we are havin a tough time communicating. I recently found out that he has been talking behind my back and "tolerating" me so that I can be quiet and not remind me that he has a responsibility. I found this out through breaking into his emails and overtaking his myspace account. His myspace account now depicts a "sperm donor". His Mother had the audacity to call me mentally unstable an she is worried about her granchild because of my mental health. I am not crazy, just frustrated. He is not stepping up to the plate and refuses to speak with me. So I took it upon myself to send him a wakeup call. I refuse to give him back his email passwords. He cant break into them because I changed all his information. I am sick and tired of this game. I thought it would make me feel better but I still feel like crap. HIs Mom says Im punishing her by threatening he cant see his kid. I am drained!!!!
2007-10-15 03:33:29 · 13 answers · asked by Tha Jane 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
you need to see a therapist for your control issues- your hormones seem to be WWWAAAAAY outta wack during your pregnency. Communicate with the guy only when nessecary and keep the conversations short and only about the baby. The two of you are not married- he doesnt have to pretend he's fond of you- just respect you. you have NO right to control HIS email and myspace- i would avoid you too, that is seriously creepy and possilbly illegal.
2007-10-15 03:44:29 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle O 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is not the way mature people act. You cannot force the guy to be a father. Each parent can either decide to be or parent or not to. It's up to you what he does. He's doing things on myspace to piss you off. You're letting him do it. You're also breaking the law by going on HIS account and locking him out of it. You could go to jail for this. You are playing this game as much as he is. Probably more so. I doubt he really thinks about it much once he turns off the computer. You need to start acting like an adult, because you are having a baby, stop acting like one. I wouldn't say you are crazy, but I would worry about your stabiltiy provided you're having a baby.
I would never behave like this. How old are you? You are pregnant and having a baby start acting like it. Seriously, you are being very immature. You can't force him into fatherhood. Sorry but you can't. And stop doing petty things to make yourself feel better. This isn't even about you or him anymore. It's about a baby you both made and will bring into the world. You need to grow up now. I feel sorry for that baby.
2007-10-15 06:53:03 · answer #2 · answered by musicpanther67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are mentally unstable.
Who, in their right mind would break into someones private website and email accounts in spite? Hmm, a mentally unstable person. Someone who is insecure and needs to find out what people are saying about them.
Forget this guy if he wants to ignore you let him. Get in the mind set that you don't need him because you honestly don't. That's what will make him talk to you. If you act desperate for attention and start getting sneaky he's just going to go further and further away.
"I am sick and tired of this game." You are the only one playing the game. So, stop and you won't be so sick or tired.
2007-10-15 07:01:06 · answer #3 · answered by .vato. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mentally unstable is not the term I would use.
"Sneaky and manipulative" is what I would say.
You broke into his emails and took over his Myspace account. What good will that do? You are not together with him, so his email and Myspace account are none of your concern. How would you feel if someone did that to you? For ANY reason?
Turn his email and Myspace back over to him, grow up, and deal with your pregnancy, the birth of your child and his/her future on your own. Of course he should pay child support, and an attorney will advise you as to the proper channels to secure that.
He obviously wants nothing to do with you or the baby....so scrape him off and let him go.
2007-10-15 03:46:29 · answer #4 · answered by artistagent116 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am also pregnant, and I understand that craziness that you are experiencing.... In a few weeks your hormones should 'balance out' a little and things will seem more sane.
Give him back his account info. As you found out, this does nothing for your peace of mind, and doesn't help matters at all. Find away to come to terms with the fact that you and him may never have a relationship on your terms, if any at all. Apologize for the craziness and avoid communicating with him until you feel you can have a reasonable conversation about his responsibilities. If he is unwilling, walk away, and seek legal advice, if you cannot work things out (if that is the path you choose).
Treat his mother as a separate person from him. If, despite what happens with him, you can work out some terms where she can visit with her grandchild, do so. She is not necassarily guilty by association, even though you may not want to deal. Knowing one's family is important, and should be pursued, if at all possible.
If things don't work out the way you want, take a deep breath and let it all go. None if it matters now. You are going to me a Mama! Focus on that. Keep yourself and your child happy, and to hell with the rest. It just doesn't matter. And while not ideal, You Can Do It On Your Own!
Good Luck.
PS.. If he writes bullshit about you on his MySpace page.... To hell with it... Let it go. Be the bigger person. You know who you are, and nothing he writes about you changes that. Just because he writes things, doesn't make them true...
And don't look at his page anymore... You'll just drive yourself crazy...
2007-10-15 04:58:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh good grief!!..Why do we cater to the desire of others to side step the truth? When someone is acting abominably, we say they are what they are, Abominable. The truth may offend someone but if it does, it is because they are reflected badly in the light of truth. When we say a person is retarded, we are saying that something is holding them back. The reason it has become such a political hot issue is because people have used the word with rancor. They have communicated disrespect and dismissal. It is the dismissal and hatred of disrespect that people are objecting to. Making someone an outcast because you lack the charity of heart to love people is a cruel and malicious act. This is the real crime, not the choice of words. When we use words to separate people from general society, we precipitate a hate crime. People should never be separated from general society unless they have proven themselves dangerous to others through criminal or psychopathic behavior. Society is a basic need of man and access to society should be protected at every opportunity. Speak the truth always with love, but speak your truth, If you deliver truth through love, people will accept what you say regardless of the words you use. Honestly use the words that closest fit what you mean. If cognitive, use cognitive. If retarding is meant, then use it. Say what you mean, but Mean what you say. edit, from a corporate aspect, the concerns are for those who are disabled or impared. mental or physical imparement are considered for the same reasons and so I am not sure it is important to delineate between them. Just use the relevant terms.
2016-05-22 17:36:10 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't crazy, but you do need to chill out and try to get on with the father and his mother for the sake of the kid. Sorry, he does sound like an complete dick, but he is the child's father and it's not fair to the child if you deny him access to the child just because he's a dick. If he won't take financial responsibility, then ultimately you'll have to go to court. I think that you should give the password back and tell him that you're only doing it because for the sake of your child, you don't want to row with him unless it's absolutely neccessary.
2007-10-15 03:45:52 · answer #7 · answered by Blink 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, this could all be your hormones talking. Look, before I got pregnant I wasnt really that "brave." But once I got pregnant... (which I didnt even know) I started accusing him of cheating and being a man-hore and all of these horrible things. Sometimes... things went on in my head that I cant even account for. I too feel that Im crazy but I know that I wasnt like this before I got pregnant so everyhting makes sense. Well I assume you are NOT married to the baby's father and therefore I think you went a little too far by compromising his accounts. That kinda depicts a stalker. But I know how you feel, all you want is someone to take care of you and cuddle you but this guy is not like that so you are mad bc you have so many feelings inside you right now. It will all pass. dont worry
2007-10-15 03:41:24 · answer #8 · answered by Is that your final answer? 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Leave him alone-if he wants nothing to do with you and is acting like a jerk, why would you want him (and his obnoxious mother, who raised him to treat a woman so un-gentlemanly) anyway? This boy doesn't sound like a good role model for your baby.
His behavior along with your hormones are obviously hurting you, and you are not thinking clearly. But do think about this- you are going to be a mother so you must put yourself and your child first. Stay away from him and focus on staying healthy, both physically and mentally.
When the baby is born, have a paternity test (b/c he might want one) and file for child support!
2007-10-15 08:00:05 · answer #9 · answered by marli 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone on Yahoo Answers is either mentally unstable or totally insane/mad/hyper etc.
You are a mother to be and it's little wonder you feel 'mad' or unbalanced.
I'm a man creature and like George Bernard Shaw once said when asked, "What is the difference between men and women", quickly replied [sharp wit], "I cannot possibly conceive".
I hope you get whatever it is, sorted out. You need a stable family unit if possible for bringing up baby.
2007-10-15 03:45:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋