We are 15 and my friend just told me that her parents abuse her. For example: Her mom is making her loose ten pounds or she is taking away all her privileges, all though she is perfectly healthy and ok with her body image. She explained this too her mom but she doesn't care.
Then anouther time she borrowed something of her dads and he accused her of stealing it and he whacked her on the shoulder. I always knew her parents were mean and unfair just not like that.
She has phoned a child help hot line but they want to remove her from the household and she panicked and hung up. I just found out this whole whammy today and i can't stop crying. I feel really really bad for her and i don't know what i can do or she can do to resolve this. It's just not fair that my household is so perfect while she has no love or support at home. I'm not allowed to tell anyone that she told me this. I dont know what to do or tell her. Please someone help us?
2007-10-14 18:06:24 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I am aware i asked this already, but i was asking it for my friend before i knew the whole story
2007-10-14 18:10:21 · update #1
you just asked this question about yourself not too long ago.
2007-10-14 18:08:26 · answer #1 · answered by colostomy_punch 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are such a good and compassionate friend. Your friend is truly blessed having you as her friend. For me, you need to seek the advise from your own parents first. Inform them how much you are affected by this and how much you want to help. Your friend's parents might not appreciate the meddling if they hear it from a 15 y.o. I am sure your parents would know better how to resolve your friend's predicament. It is better if you let this issue be resolved by fellow adults (like your loving parents).
Your friend asked you not to share this info with anyone else BUT you have to tell your parents about this. You cannot save your friend alone - you need adult supervision in resolving this. Besides I am sure your friend will understand that the only reason you squealed is out of pure intent.
There are social workers and institutions that help stop child abuse. But definitely being taken away from home will be one of the options. Just be ready for the consequences. For the meantime - just be there for your friend and just assure her of your love and sincere friendship. Your friend is very troubled and she needs to feel secure and love despite troubles at home.
2007-10-14 18:42:16 · answer #2 · answered by addicted too 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This situation sounds scarily similar to my own when I was that age, My dad would put me on the scale and constantly hound me about losing weight when I was already less than 100 and showing ribs. He wouldn't buy clothes for me, and just made me feel like nothing. I finally got a job when I was old enough, but he just accused me of sleeping with my boss and wouldn't shut up about what a dirty slut I was. Then I hid it form everyone, but in hindsight, I really wish I would have spoken up so that I could have gone to foster care. I think you should encourage her to call the helpline herself again. If not call the tipline without leaving your name. I'm sure foster care would be better than what she has now. She will thank you later.
2007-10-14 18:14:28 · answer #3 · answered by love 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are two choices here. One, she can report this abuse and be prepared for the consiquences which is most likely being removed from her household and possible jail time for the parent(s). The second is to remain secretive, continue getting abused, and risk having serious emotional problems as an adult. The choice is hers. Point blank.
2007-10-14 18:12:02 · answer #4 · answered by UVRay 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a list of the possibilities of each option. Then weigh what you have written down. That is a good way to make a tough decision.
Removing her from the household is not always the best option. If she is removed she will be shuffled around in foster homes.
2007-10-14 18:10:36 · answer #5 · answered by C C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First step. she can talk to her school counselor.
If she decided to call the child help line- If they removed her, she can ask to stay with a friend or relative. She does not have to end up in a foster home. Does she have any relatives she can stay with?
It sounds like the family needs counseling. If child protective services intervened, this would happen.
2007-10-14 18:28:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not a good place for your firend to be and she needs to get out, why can't you ask if she can stay with you or another friends place? Either way abuse is abuse and no one shouldhave to live wiht or put up with it. Call the police or tell the school counsellor, she cant stay there thats for sure!
2007-10-14 19:30:39 · answer #7 · answered by jaineelyse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like she needs to call that helpline back and get removed from the house. she shouldnt be continued to be abused for no reason. and get treated this way. she is going to be a damaged young lady. she might need to call the police or talk to someone older that she can trust. why dont you ask your mom for advice? maybe she needs to move in with a family member or friend that she can get treated better. good luck.
2007-10-14 18:10:00 · answer #8 · answered by Fit 4 A King 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh wow this is a big one.Tell her she would get a good home who loves her and keeps her safe.U have to get her out of that house tell a adult.She may get really hurt if this continues.God bless your friend i hope everthing will be all right.
2007-10-14 18:14:20 · answer #9 · answered by Faithiy Bee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell a school counselor what's going on and maybe they can help. If, your parents want to get involved. Then maybe she can stay with you if she doesn't want to go to foster care. Sad, but parents even if there losers have more rights.
2007-10-14 18:15:28 · answer #10 · answered by Tarrimarie B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the school councelor or call a help line yourself
2007-10-14 18:08:55 · answer #11 · answered by And For A Moment I Am Happy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋