What To Do When You Can't Cut the Guest List?

Question

We already have cut our guest list ALOT. We have come to a number of 140 people. 70 for both sides. This is pretty reasonable considering we have LARGE families. I have 13 immediate cousins, whom I'm all close with. Nearly half are married or in serious relationships. So, for them alone I'll be inviting........20-22 people. Not including my parents, my siblings and dates, my aunts and uncles, grandparents.....plus I do want some friend there.

It's the same for this family. We are only inviting people we are close to. However, we are close to a LOT of people.

So, far we have we have 10K saved for our reception. But, with 140 people....we will need at least another 3K to make the costs. The reception is very cheap for our area (city area) $70 per person, plus tax and gratuity. Good package too, lots of food/bar I've already factored in the initial $500 deposit too.

So, what to do? I'm sort 3K for the reception. But, I can't cut the list anymore.

I've already cut out people we rarely see and children.

Also, doing our own cooking or having it at home....is out. My mother would not have the patients for that (if she had to help me cook, and she would feel obligated) as well as the same feeling for his mother.

I checked out catering too. It ended up being more expensive, b/c every single items was per person and not a package.

We live one of the most expensive areas in the country w/ one of the highest per person income statistics. So, everything is overpriced here.

Answer 1

Look at a lot of bakeries for the cake to get the best price for the most cake. Look at the menu one more time and see if there isn't a less expensive option for dinner. Limit the amount of time you have the DJ and/or photographer. Or eliminate the DJ altogether and do the ipod thing that a lot of couples are doing now. Find cheaper flowers for centerpieces or hit up the dollar store and do candles and beads and various things. Eliminate an hour or two from the reception and/or look at a night other than Saturday for the wedding unless you are locked into a certain date.

Answer 2

Yikes, $70 is steep! I'm glad I live in a smaller city. :)

You could cut out open bar and go with beer and wine.

I don't know what time of day your reception is, but it might be cheaper if you hold it in the afternoon. You could do heavy appetizers. I'm actually doing a heavy appetizer buffet in the afternoon because we have an outrageous guest list, but I was able to choose so many that it's going to be a luncheon.

You might check out the price of a served meal versus a buffet. Not sure what you're doing now, but sometimes there are big differences between them.

Cut back on the food, or go with a cheaper dish. If you were picking say, steak, no one will know you went for the cheaper chicken. No one will care, either. Offer only one meal choice, as most caterers charge extra for more than one.

While it's true that maybe 10-15% of them won't come, you have to be able to plan for every single one of them to come.

You have to prioritize what's most important to you. Serving great food? Having a DJ or a live band? Having beautiful flowers? Sacrifice something somewhere else to save money for the reception, if the food is what's most important to you. Have fewer flowers or cheaper flowers or maybe silk flowers. Save money on your cake by having a smaller tiered cake, and do a sheet cake so you have enough. You can save a lot of money this way. Forget favors. Maybe do your own invitations.

Make a list of what's most important to you, then a list of what's least important to you. Look at what's least important, and see how you can save money on those things.

Answer 3

You on Long Island?? Because I think that is where the most expensive weddings are. Maybe Los Angeles is tied w/ NY/LI but it's close. Anyway, look at your extras. Find a discount florist ( they do wholesale and only weddings) They are much cheaper than your average florist and you can get the same thing. (Here is an example of one on long island -they are very good) http://www.flowersbyburton.com/index.html See if the catering hall has large tables (more people at a table means less centerpieces) Also, see if you can cut back on photography, maybe have a family member video the ceremony and no videographer. Are Limos necessary or can you do without them? Music? Can you find a cheaper DJ? Also DIY alot of decorations. Bows for pews, favors, programs, menus, invitations, card box, etc. The flowers for my church ceremony came out to $60. I had my local florist put 2 $25 bouquets of mixed flowers in cheap vases i found. They looked beautiful. (The vases were blue glass and went the the girls periwinkle dresses, plus since they were holding colorful flowers the mixed arrangement looked like it matched too) Do your hair & makeup yourself if you can. They are plenty of ways to save money.

Also keep in mind that not everyone will attend and you will get gifts. I wouldn't depend on it but it will happen and may help offset the cost.

Also, figure out how long it will take you to save 3k. You might not be as short as you think.

Good Luck.

Answer 4

How far away is the wedding? I know you are probably already saving but is there anything you can cut back on or could you save more money? Could you sell some things you don't use anymore?
Failing that have you asked both you parents for help? Between both sets of parents $1500 each is not too much.
Or talk to you caterer. Will they give you a discount rate if you have only 1 selection of meal (instead of the chicken or steak just have one or the other) or serve you wedding cake as dessert?
Cut back on other things in the wedding like centrepieces and favours, flowers, etc and use the money for the reception.
Or there is always credit cards!.

Answer 5

Not many people do this, but it can be a great costs saver in your situation while creating the a very elegant event. You can seek wedding caterers/planners/florists from other areas of the country. It is often less expensive to bring in the professionals than deal with local vendors... But be careful... You only want the best. Make sure that you bring in sought after and reputable people.

This only works if the reception location will accomidate offsite vendors. Most have in house food and beverage. If you are dealing with inhouse F&B it can be cost saving to emply an event planner to negotiate a better fee.

By the way Zelonia is "WRONG" you can limit the bar, but a cash bar at a wedding is just plain trashy.

Good luck

Answer 6

You'll need to either cut the guest list or change where you are having it, cut back how much your dress will be, your fiance's attire, etc.

Cut out favors, unless they are edible. Cut back on decorations if that will bring the price down. Cut back on gifts for the wedding party and your parents if you are including that in the budget. Get rid of the open bar (alcohol free).

How far away is the wedding? Cut back on unneccessary things, sell stuff that you hardly ever use. Ask if your parents can help by giving you a small loan.

Answer 7

How far away is the wedding? Can one of you get a temporary part-time (ie weekend) job? What expenses (outside the reception) can you cut back on?


I don't care what people say about a cash bar being tacky. It is not. Your friends are there to celebrate with you.. If you have to ply them with expensive food & free booze, then they aren't your friends. You could do maybe one or 2 drinks, and the champagne toast.

Answer 8

I would consider instead of doing a dinner, do a dessert buffet, a cocktail reception, or a lunch. That will cut down your reception a lot. Also, a limited bar (but don't do a cash bar... tacky!). Forget favors.... no one uses them, and they aren't necessary. See what you can do about DIY.... a close friend can do your hair and make-up possibly? An aunt decorate a cake? That kind of thing.

Answer 9

i don't be attentive to something regarding the o.c. yet i'm particular that being married on a sea coast is loose. u will could desire to lease chairs although...except there is a few form of park on a sea coast someplace there. u could have a potluck form picnic for the reception...and function kinfolk carry nutrition. or u can lease some cocktail tables and function purely some punch/much less high priced beverages and then some form of snack. basically stroll around and communicate with each and every person...u ought to locate a chum with some musical expertise to play guitar or something for ur song. there is likewise a lot of amature photographers accessible for much less high priced! preachers are loose, they simply settle for donations make a vow to ur 3 year. old and supply him/her a recent. and watch the television teach 'whose wedding ceremony is it besides?' on the form channel! they have a lot of suggestions!

Answer 10

I will be honest, it will be difficult . . . especially with the number of people. I had a difficult time with my wedding too.

I had almost 300 people at my wedding, most were from my side, since my beloved came from the Philippines, via Canada. So approximately, 50 were from my beloved side.

I did all the planning myself, since my beloved was in Canada at the time.

I created my own invitations and printed them out, with the assistance of a couple of friends in the industry.

The cake was a cooperation for a couple of bakeries, whom I referred a lot of business to, which they gladly gave to me.

I done my own flowers, bought them wholesale and two weeks before the wedding, we put them all together, for bouquets, boutonnieres, centerpieces, displays, etc. We had a party, at a local florists warehouse, who was also a close friend of mine.

The food was always the most complicated, I didn't want fixed menus of chicken, meat, or fish . . . some of the guests were strickly vegitarians, which is why I don't like catering packages, in many cases the food is cold unless it was prepared right on site.

I done some of the prep work myself, for the simple stuff . . . but most of the real work I handed it out to guests or shall I say friends who are in the industry. I have two uncles that work as chefs at two different restuarants. Another uncle that was a butcher. I also had friends who owned or worked at various restuarants. Basically, I worked out a deal with each one, told them my dilemma, and the variety of people who was attending. Basically, we went buffet style . . . with foods ranging from American, Italian, Filipino, Thai, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Greek, French, German, Spanish, Mexican, Vegetarian, etc.

Music was a slight disaster, I had a band, which showed up late and a DJ who brought the wrong music. It was all set-up by a friend who was a promoter.

Photo and videos, were all handled by family and friends. Since I am a professional photographer, I handled many of the static pictures myself, with the aid of a couple of volunteer assistants.

No matter what, no wedding is perfect . . . I was in the back of the church, giving directions to the reception hall, where the food was to be delivered. Most of the friends, who helped with the food and everything else, was at the ceremony. An aunt of mine, took the phone out my hands and told me to get my *** down the aisle. She handed my phone off to her personal assistant.

Thing is, we ran out of certain food, but in the end, there was plenty of variety that everyone was satisfied. Some of my guests where unfamiliar with some of the food, and it delighted their pallet to try something new and refreshing.

To me, it sound like you hired a reception hall which has it's own catering facilities. Which accounts for the prices, because not only are you getting the location, you are getting the food and the staff included.

I know some may have suggested that you place on the reception invitation, please no children. You may lose a couple of guests, but I will be honest. People are not going to listen, they are going to bring children anyway. A cousin a mine, which I sang at her wedding . . . had that on her invitation. Many members of one side of the family (groom's side) didn't show up for the reception because no children were allowed. While her side, had children running up and down the halls and around table. Many members of her new in-laws were upset, because they didn't attend because of the no children clause. So be careful with that.