She's bipolar and suffers from depression as well. She is currently avoiding all of her family and surrounds herself with a bunch of non working, loafing losers as friends. She works as a waitress and has incurred about 10K in medical bills because she did not have health insurance. I have been calling her to try to get together with her in order to guide her, but she has been avoiding all of us in her family like the plague. Do I let her crash and burn or what?????
2007-10-14 16:25:39 · 20 answers · asked by wanninonni 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
what is your heart telling you?
since you're asking.. I think this means you are concerned... mental illness can be very difficult... she is your daughter... how would you feel if tomorrow you get the worse news of your life regarding your daughter.. would you blame yourself for not doing more?
MY feeling would be to never quit... no matter how hard it gets.
2007-10-14 16:31:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first step is to point out to her that her bipolar is interfering with her life, and point out the times and ways. Then tell her that you know she is smart and practical and that she can figure out how to correct this situation, or can find help if she needs it.
You shouldn't worry to such an extent about a daughter that is able to hold down a demanding job like being a waitress. You also say that she needs help, but she has all these medical bills, so obviously she has been going to doctors a lot. Even if she went for other things, if she was so seriously mentally ill, they would have referred her.
Since she is 24 years old, you must let her make her own decisions and live her own life.
2007-10-14 16:47:27 · answer #2 · answered by Bond girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are things that can be done if she is judged "incompetent" by a court. Unfortunatley for the family members who love a child with mental illness, their options are limited because of all the so-called rights granted to people who are on a downward spiral.
So these loved family members end up in deeper and deeper trouble, ending up on the streets, self-medicating with street drugs and adding physical illness to their mental illnesses.
Monitor her as closely as you can, and if she gets into trouble with the law get involved and try and have her judged "incompetent" and become her conservator and try and have her hospitalized.
Several generations ago a family could have a mentally ill loved one commited to a mental hospital much more easily than today. And the mentally ill suffer for all the "rights" they have.
Good luck.
2007-10-14 16:33:43 · answer #3 · answered by WhatAmI? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am Bipolar, along with other diagnoses, and although I can't tell you what you should do, I can say, that with any other illness that require the person who suffers FROM it to be involved in the treatment of same, (i.e., mental illness, alcoholism, substance abuse, eating disorders, etc.) - it more often than not seems as though the person HAS to hit bottom before they will finally seek help. And even then, many times will have to do it over and over again. (The important thing is they keep trying!). That said, please understand that you, and the rest of your family, cannot force her to seek help. As frustrating as this is, and as painful as it is to watch. Only she has the power to help herself.
Just stand by, keep an eye out, continue to let her know you're there, and cross your fingers and hope.
My thoughts are with you.
2007-10-14 16:33:15 · answer #4 · answered by girliegirl68 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she will have to crash and burn before she realizes she has a problem. People worry too much about that "stigma" that society puts on people with mental disorders when in reality if they just got mental help and started taking their meds regularly they wouldnt get themselves into so much emotional and situational trouble.
I hope your daughter gets the help she needs as soon as she is able to accept she needs help. Until then, she is not going to listen and just push you away even more.
2007-10-14 16:35:06 · answer #5 · answered by greyskymourning82 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can go to your local probate office and sign a pick up order to have her evaluated. usually it takes two people that know her well to get the order. She would be picked up by law enforcement and taken to the hospital where a local mental health care worker will speak with her and between the mental health care worker and local doctor, a determination will be made as to if she will be sent somewhere for treatment. Law enforcement will transport. Good Luck!
2007-10-14 16:39:02 · answer #6 · answered by parnett 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF your daughter is not a danger to herself or others than it will not be possible. You can't have your daughter committed unless she's a danger to herself or others. As someone who has three disabilities I know what it's like as an adult who everyone is telling what to do with your life. IF you want your daughter to listen to you to accept that you want the best for her than you have to treat her like she's an adult even when you don't like the way that she's acting right now. That is the only way that you will get her to pay attention to what you want.
You have to go to her and treat her like she's an adult even though it will be hard because you don't agree with what she's doing with her life. It's her life and she has a right to live it the way that she wants to as long as she isn't hurting anyone. That's probably why she's with those people that you call losers because they treat her like she's an adult, like she can make up her own mind about things. You have to make that decision that she's an adult and that she's entitled to live her life as she sees fit. IF you can go to her and treat her like an adult and truly mean it you will be able in time to get her to listen to you. But what you have to remember is that she might take your advise or she might not it's her choice. Go to her as she's an adult and make friends with her, don't start telling her that she should be in therapy or that she should be taking medications, She's sick not stupid she already knows this, her not doing so is taking back control over her own life. It one way of proving if to no one else but herself that she's an adult capable of making her own decisions. Just try to be her friend for now, treat her like any other grown child and she may come to the point where she no longer feels that she has to prove her independence by acting out and she'll go back into therapy and back on her meds. Don't act like she's a child and she won't have to act like one by acting out to prove that she's not.
2007-10-14 16:57:03 · answer #7 · answered by Kathryn R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it may be, you may just have to let her live her own life. I have a close friend with bipolar and Ive tried helping him in the past only to be hurt when he goes back to the life that I tried to get him away from. Ive come to the conclusion now that the only person who can help him is himself.
Because of her age, there isnt much you can do health system wise. She needs to look after her self
I understand it is extremely hard but I think it's time for you to step back and let her live her life
2007-10-14 16:30:29 · answer #8 · answered by Kylie J 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Call with any problem, Anytime:
Girls and Boys Town National Hotline
Phone: 1-800-448-3000
Email: Hotline@girlsandboystown.org
They have the trained professionals to
help you with this. Seriously. <}:-{(
2007-10-14 16:33:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no easy answer! that's why mental 'illnessess' are so hard to treat: the patient often is in a mindframe that keeps them from seeking to get better.
maybe you can contact one of her better friends that she still trusts, and together come up with ideas she can use to convince your daughter to get the help she needs.
if you love her, you must try something. once someone crashes & burns (i.e., gets involved heavily with drugs and/or the legal system), it is deucedly difficult to get them out
2007-10-14 16:30:16 · answer #10 · answered by disgruntleddog 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋