Me and my ex broke up 3-4 weeks ago and while it was difficult at first we decided to try and stay friends. He has been making almost all of the contact and phones me etc quite a lot. Hes made a couple of comments that have made me think he wants to get back together but when I asked if he felt that way he said definitely not, he just wants to be friends etc. Hes always asking am I ok etc, almost if he wants me to say no, I'm not (which I don't).
I know he likes to keep in contact with his exes, and i also think that he is missing me a lot - as in actually having a gf. So my question is do you think he is maybe confused about what he want or is he just being friendly?
I'm not sure if I would want us to get back together anyway unless things changed quite a lot, but I like to know where I stand so any advice would be good thanks!
Fx
Oh ps we were together almost 3 years and went through a LOT of things together like family deaths etc
2007-10-14 11:29:12 · 9 answers · asked by Fiona A 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You cant ask anyone eleses opinions on this sort of thing, its not like the usual question that people ask on here. You need to ask yourself and do what you think feels right.
Hope this helps
2007-10-14 11:33:32 · answer #1 · answered by Vote for me and recieve your fre 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me like you were more than just a gf. You were his best mate.
You say you went through alot together. 3 years is a long time to be with someone. Stay friends with him, but make it clear to him that's all you are. He's maybe finding the break up with you hard to get over. Maybe feeling guilty for some things, I don't know. Nothing wrong though with staying friends with exes. It just goes to show what kind of a relationship you 2 had when you were together.
Good luck hun. I think you might have just a good friend there.
2007-10-14 18:36:59 · answer #2 · answered by Jane S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he just wants a friend and that might be the reason the 2 of you didn't work out. It sounds like he is just feeling things out on the girl stuff and not wanting anything serious for right now. I would remain his friend just for the fact that you do have a lot of history together, as you said. Maybe just to be free and have fun without the serious stuff for now and guys need that time, they don't need a constant close relationship, it sounds like he has no time for his guy friends, until now. You know how sometimes you just sit and wonder what it would be like if you had FUN and no one ever said " Did you talk to her? Do you like her now? anything that is considered as judgemental, or not free to do what you wanna do. Many people feel tied down if they have no freedom to be themselves, and I doubt thats the case here, but what if it is? A 3 year relationship, unless your over 25, HOW IS THAT FUN???? Is he enjoying life? I mean REALLY ENJOYING HIS LIFE???? As a young person, you need to get all the fun out of your system, have a lot of fun, laugh, dance, sing whatever it is, this is the time to do it. Once you have that, you learn what it is to be responsible for another persons life and how you need to focus on a smaller child and your life changes. I'm not saying a relationship is bad, it's VERY HEALTHY, but don't let it restrict your life when needing to be with your other friends, not that you do that, but girls tend to become a bit offensive when others become very close to that man they love. I could be wrong about this and if I am, at least I gave you my opinion but ASK him...... Do you need space? freedom with your buddies? time alone? In the back of his mind he could be asking himself? What does this lead to? Do I have to marry her? If I'm with her this long.... I just really don't know but that I have been there in the shoes of the other person, and I felt I was missing out on something, I wanted to feel free to do what I wanted but I still wanted him close if I was wrong. Does this make any sense at all? Well I have clearly written you a book. Good Luck, you sound like a Wonderful person.
2007-10-14 18:52:28 · answer #3 · answered by darlin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Breakups usually involve a lot of mixed emotions. It seems that you are catching that from him now.
I think one can stay friends with an ex, but it takes some time. A three month break in contact might be a good idea for both of you to be in a better place emotionally.
2007-10-14 18:35:43 · answer #4 · answered by BlueEyedWoman000 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's going through that transitional stage, before meeting someone else, and feeling lonely. It'll pass, keep him as a friend if you wish, but don't confuse his being lonely & bored, with a need to get back with you.
When he's moved on a bit, the contact will be less and less frequent.
2007-10-14 18:33:09 · answer #5 · answered by jet-set 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he could just be friendly and concerned maybe he cares about you as a friend and wants to know you are ok some guys honestly dont wanna hurt you that's half the bad part of breakin up...........
2007-10-14 18:32:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He probably feels bad for breaking up with you.He is just being friendly.
2007-10-14 18:32:55 · answer #7 · answered by kurston b 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
keep it as a friendship and see what happens. he probably did not change as much as you would like. they usually dont
2007-10-14 18:33:46 · answer #8 · answered by Aloha_Ann 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
he wants to get back in your nickers
2007-10-14 18:33:18 · answer #9 · answered by rosco 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋