Abuse Scenario...?

Question

What do you do when you're out in society and you see an animal or child that is injured or just doesn't look well being treated roughly? Perhaps not rough enough so that you can be certain there is abuse occurring.

Say the child had food tossed at him, he was dirty, looked so hopeless and despondent that it broke your heart. Say the animal is being tugged hard and scolded every couple steps, but not enough to hurt him. Say you observe this and enough that you *feel* that perhaps there *is* abuse occurring.

What do you do? I don't know where these people live. Do I follow them home? Do I call the Children's Aid Society, the police, or Humane Society from a pay phone? Would these places send someone out to investigate something that isn't occurring now but may or may not be occurring at another time?

I have observed two instances like this involving a dog and a boy (different people, involved) and I am literally sick over it...

Serpico7: Thanx!! You think this would be appropriate even if nothing that could be considered abuse is occurring at the time? In terms of my citing "being sick over it", well, I'm very sensitive to these things that perhaps, others wouldn't be. I wonder about calling the police based on a hunch, instinct, or what may be even my own biassed assumptions...

Sorry, I can't give thumbs-up, I am only a level-oner :-).

Whoa! Thanx Valac! You COMPLETELY understood the predicament and where I was coming from, in general. Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you. Great advice!!

:-)
:-)

Sorry about not givng everyone a thumbs-up. Until I reach level two, it's not possible. Please know that I really, really appreciate all of your concern, kindness, and advice.

Thanx Mdgreg C!! Haven't talked to you in a few days. Glad to see you around!!

Very weird situation. It's not abuse, but something that *could* be abuse behind closed doors.

I see what you are getting at and, yeah, I can envision many scenarios involving my own actions that could make the situation worse for the boy or pet, as well as myself...

Thanx mdGreg C. I think I can relate. I could never work in an abused animal shelter, even the humane society, or a shelter for abused women. No way.

I worked at a Distress Centre and an Alchohol Addiction facility between my BA and MA and it was then I learned I could never be a clinician. I struggled with the balance between subjectivity and objectivity. Too much subjectivity helps no one but me.

MdGreg C: I am not familiar with the Legend of Buddha, but now you *know* I'm gonna look something up :-)

Thanx for that mdGreg C. I looked something up and I guess there's a movie called the "Legend of Buddha" so was just getting hits on that.

Yeah, definitely have to carefully consider how to mitigate these situations. If I let my "feelings" do the thinking? Boy, I'd likely not be here talking to you :-). I see this sh!t, like this, all the time though and so an effort to determine what really seems like abuse and what just might conflict with my own sense of morality and have mostly to do with my own biasses.

I plan to do exactly as Valac has advised, actually. I never even considered many of the points she made. Notably, in regards to reasonable embellishing and getting it on record.

Thanx again mdGreg C!!! Yet another clever phrase chaulk full of depth. I may steal this one too ;-).

Thanx for your edit too, Valac :-) :-).

Answer 1

What to do isn't as simple as it might first appear. I greatly admire & respect you for caring. "Help" isn't always what would meet our expectations; from CPS, police, or Humane Society. I'll reference a personal incident as briefly as I can, only to confirm my point.
I was alone, blinds drawn & all lights on. I heard what seemed like spattering of tiny pebbles at the window of my office in another room, & then silence. More spattering. Then, rocks. Clearly, someone wanted to know if anyone was home. I immediately put my cat in a bedroom & closed the door, & stood about 12 feet from the window. As the screen was ripped, I felt nothing but RAGE. I dialed 911, holding my ground, & was told to lock myself in a room. The HELL I would. The glass splintered, & just as the blinds folded, I yellled: "I'm anxious for you to get inside, so I can splash you effing blood all over my carpet." (Here, the miscreants have to be inside your property before you can defend yourself.)
The bottom line is that when I yelled, the police were at the street with flashing lights & the coward/s escaped, but I was treated like the criminal, because--let's say--I had protection. My windowsill was too "dirty" to get fingerprints. My "protection" was emptied into a waste basket; the ground was too moist to follow footprints. I was insulted.
This may be .0001% of rude & uncaring responses. But, it HAPPENS.
Candidly? In your case, you had no "legal" grounds for accusation. HOWEVER. I would have "exaggerated" the incident by intimation without outright lying; once having gotten "someone" out, at least the name of the adult would have been on record--I would have demanded a report--& this would help if any further incidents occurred. (I believe, but I'm not sure, you should also then know the name & address of this "person.")
Following them home would probably accomplish nothing. My dear, I would carefully "embellish" to get someone's attention. Get it on record. "Potential," which is not yet criminal, has been proved to be tragic, but "authorities" can do nothing under law UNTIL it becomes tragic.
I would "stretch" the truth as far as realistic, & that's the best anyone could do. I applaud you for your sensitivity. Preventive isn't a legal term in such a case as this; in fact--to call someone with only the possibility of future abuse can put you on a "crank" list. The legal system cannot recognize, or enforce "feelings." Morality & legality aren't synonomous.
What is the BEST you can accomplish? Go for it. (But don't stumble over your own feet.)

Edit: Being "sick over it" doesn't establish abuse. Also, CGIV76 is correct--don't intervene. (I yelled at some kids wringing a duck's neck; they went crying to their mommy & the police were right at my door, the children having claimed I'd threatened them; Mommy had a record of calls made against her, so all turned out okay.) Remember: Responsibliity (emotion & morality), options (reality), strategy (logic) & your safety.

Edit: Awesome. mdGreg C! "Without destroying oneself in the process." K, only you know what recently happened to me? I could have been "destroyed." However, I've learned that I must--& can--be selective. Didn't I say something about safety? Well, there you have it! Mitigate, yes. But each of us has to evaluate our limits, don't we?

Answer 2

Yeah, I Can See Taking Action as Being Very Difficult to Do, Many Times One Can See Making Things Worse, Perhaps Ending Some Suffering, but One Cannot Do Everything, One Might End Up Destroying Oneself In the Process of Wanting to Be Helpful.


Sort of Like the Legend of Buddha, I Used to Volunteer Regularly In Hospices/Nursing Homes, I Finally had to Stop or Allow the Sadness to Destroy me, or Become a Problem Myself.


K, What I See as the Ultimate Meaning of the Story, is that There is Suffering In the World, and Perhaps the Best Tact is Some Attempt to Mitigate It, Without Destroying Oneself In the Process.


Yeah K, Difficult, I've Heard "Feed the Hungry", but to the Point of Starving Oneself?

Thanks Gypsy.

Answer 3

I have experienced that also, but when I do there are two things that I do, I let them know as a mother I know that parenting can be hard and there are times when you have a bad day, but under no circumstance should you mistreat your child and than I call the police and let them know where we are and how long it's been and what I witnessed if I'm in a store where there are security guards I let them know what's going on so that if possible the person can be detained until the police come. In the circumstance where it an animal If the person is at their house I call the ASPCA and give them the information, what I saw and where we are and who I saw commit the act.

Answer 4

I have seen abuse or atleast what I thought was abuse on 2 different instances. The one time the girl was walking her dog and kicked it and she pulled it along roughly- I called 911 and gave her and the dogs description and they were going out to find them. Another time I saw a dad throw his daughter to the ground- I followed them once they got into the car and was on the phone with 911- they knew that I was following them and tried to get away from me but I eventually got the license plate # and knew their location- the police were also going to go out for that. If you just call 911 the police will take care of everything with CPS or whatever else is needed. You need to report abuse when you see it. Children and dogs have no one else to protect them but us if it's not their parents.

Answer 5

Child abuse and animal cruelty are crimes.
Call the police and tell them what you have observed, or are observing. If it is happening while you are on the phone, tell the dispatcher.
Unless you believe the child or animal's life is in imminent danger, DO NOT intervene. Let the police do their job.
Give an accurate description of the abuser, their vehicle description including license plate, and last know direction of travel.

Answer 6

My first dog was owned by a gang, which my aunties friend rescued when they left her after teasing her but she couldn't look after it so my Aunty, Uncle and cousins had her for awhile until they couldn't afford to look after her ethier so My family and I ended up with her.
I believe my dog Xena who is still with me was abused as well since the lady who had found her and her sister.
Her sister was in a horrid state and didn't survive.

I really hate Animal Abuse whether it's mentioned on The News, Newspapers, Magazines, The Net etc.
It makes me cry straight away, I can't help it.

A lady I knew who used to own the local petshop where I live had to close it down because she couldn't handle people finding animals in a bad way and giving them to her to look after her.
I don't blame her one bit, it's very disturbing.

I would let a good local vet or animal rescuer/rehabilitator know about what's going on in your neighbourhood.

Good Luck!
♥

Answer 7

If you're sick over it, then it certainly sounds like abuse. Call the police.

Answer 8

if you trust your judgement, than you should be able to tell whats right and what isnt right for this situation ;)