well i turn 16 in 2 months..but i'm a virgin and i wish i wasn't. But i'm just really scared to have sex because everybody says that it hurts for the first time. and i am also scared because i dont want to get pregnant!! and i know that if you use a condom then like you shouldn't but... i hear that some people get pregnent even if they used 1. Almost all of my friend are non virgins and i don't want to be a virgin either. not just because of my friends, but like idk... so how should i get over my fear of losing my virgininy? Also: does it hurt more to have sexif you're more of a smaller girl? (cuz i'm thin and 5'2)
2007-10-14 10:08:08 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well don't freak out. no one says that you have to jump into bed. your 1st time is special and it should be with a special person. i don't recommend doing things just because your friends are doing them. I am not a virgin and its more complicated than it sounds but if its with the right person meaning a guy that respects your values and your body then its your decision. just don't be one of those girls that doesn't use protection. And yes it did hurt and i'm 5'1 but height doesn't matter. Sex should be about love not sex.
No ONE CAN MAKE THIS CHOICE FOR YOU and no one can and will be there for you to deal with the consequences. And plus you sound very scared about it so don't do it. Save your V card for when you are not scared and when the prince charming guy comes along. It takes a very long time for the perfect guy to come. My simple advice wait because it looks like you are not ready. when you are ready you will never have to question the act you will know and you will never look back and regret anything. good luck
2007-10-14 10:12:51 · answer #1 · answered by Avangelis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU ARE ONLY 15! Who the heck in this world gave you that idea that having sex is good at that age? Wait until you're at least 21. I mean, GOSH, honestly, go search around answers.yahoo.com, you will find plenty of virgins over 25, or some even in the 40's. School and college should be your main focus. What grade are you in? 9th or 10th maybe? Chill out. I'm 16 and haven't gotten a kiss yet.
Trust me, most guys, unless the gigilo kind, rather have sex with a virgin once married. There's nothing wrong with being an older virgin. Keep your virginity now...
Plus, can you afford to an accident of pregnancy?
Edited Note:
Oh by the way, peer pressure of having sex isn't the point. People who are in my grade (10th) that had sex... Well, I see those girls are sluts and the dudes are sex addicts. You don't want to be called as that, right?
2007-10-14 10:14:25 · answer #2 · answered by Ashmethuleman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you in such a rush to lose your virginity, and why is it so important to you? Is it because all your friends are doing it and you are not? How do you know that your friends are not just bragging?
When the time is right you will know it in your heart. Wait until you find the right partner, somebody who you care deeply about, so that your first time will be special.
You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Please, please, do not be in such a rush to have sex just for the sake of having sex and losing your virginity. Just because your friends are having sexual intercourse it does not mean that you have to follow suit. Be your own person, and think for yourself. Be proud of who you are, and do not allow yourself to be so easily influenced by others.
If you have sex for the reason that all your friends are having sex you will later live to regret it. Believe me, I have been where you are, and asked the same questions as you did.
Nobody says you have to lose your virginity by a certain age. And losing your virginity does not make you a 'grown up' person. Life is not a race. Losing your virginity is not a race.
Once you lose your virginity that is it. So it is more important to make sure that you have the right partner and that you feel comfortable with your choice of partner.
Be wary about who you talk to regarding this matter because there are a lot of unscrupulous people around who are ready to take advantage of vulnerable people like you. Have some dignitiy and self-respect. You owe it to yourself to look after yourself, and that includes looking after your body.
Please do not throw your virginity away on a whim.
When the time is right you have two choices. You can either trust your partner to use a condom, or go on the pill. Personally I would choose the pill because you are then in charge of ensuring that you do not get pregnant.
Be wise, listen to your heart and listen to your own inner voice. Do not do something which you are not ready to do. It is your body, nobody else's.
You sound like a sound, sensible person, just trust yourself. And do not allow yourself to be pressured by anyone, and that includes your friends.
Whatever you decide to do make sure that you are in control.
Look after yourself! Be safe and be well!
Blessings, Love and Light
Suzanne x
2007-10-14 10:51:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're scared it's for a reason! Don't have sex! Trust me I made the mistake of having sex at your age and ended up pregnate! I know you said you don't want to be prego so don't even risk it. Who cares if your friends are not virgins more than likely they are going to end up being moms sooner than they want or planned. Not just that but what if you get an std? What's the point of having sex anyways that young? You are going to do it no matter what anybody on here says and thats your choice, but I would advise you not to. There is no way of getting over your "fear" it is there because your concious is telling you it's not the right time to have sex. Listen to it!
2007-10-14 10:14:40 · answer #4 · answered by ryoung 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is a wonderful thing, but if you're scared, then don't have sex just because your peers are doing it or you have some internalized pressure. When you're 50 it's not going to make that much a difference if you lost your virginity at 20 (or some other later age) rather than 16. Don't rush
2007-10-14 10:16:42 · answer #5 · answered by yu1234 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your not ready, then i wouldnt even think about it. Wait till your ready. and just dont do it becuase everyone else is not a virgin. take you time and think it over. Also the chances of getting pregnant with a condom on is like 2%
2007-10-14 10:14:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god. Please don't. Not everyone out there loses it when they're 16...I'm 16, have a boyfriend, and am not about to give it up any time soon, if at all (before marriage).
Sex is an emotional bonding activity. Yeah, it apparently feels good, and it probably hurts the first time, but unless you save it for someone special, then you lose a part of yourself to just...a stranger.
2007-10-14 10:13:27 · answer #7 · answered by Yuki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be ashamed of being a virgin. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with it. It shows that you have a lot more self-control, more respect for your body and for yourself. You won't have to worry about staying a virgin when you get older and actually WANT to have sex. Don't do it prematurely or you'll regret it later on.
2007-10-15 08:12:39 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a small girl too... let me tell you that it doesn't hurt if u are ready to do it, before I lost mine I had been trying a few times and it really hurts!!! because I wasn't ready I was too afraid and thought a lot of things, I just couldn't do it.
So if u are so worried and scared like I was don't do it, wait a little more.
2007-10-14 10:25:03 · answer #9 · answered by Melissa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If all of your friends tied a rock around their foot and jumped off a bridge, would you want to do that, too. You want to have sex ' just because... idk". That's pretty lame. Be proud you are a virgin at almost age 16. You are not ready for sex and to have sex just for the sake of being able to say you did is really stupid.
If you are just a little smart, you'll save yourself for marriage.
2007-10-14 10:14:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋