Well i am 13 and my mom still treats me like a baby and i dont like it. like she does stuff like "Hey babydoll" and i dont like it when she does that. i dont like it when she kisses me on the lips. its weird i mean it was ok when i was younger but i just dont like it. She is way over protective and stuff. and i hurt her feelings once by telling her i dont want u to call me that so i am not doing that again. i want her to b WAY less clingy and let my sleep over at my friends houses. like one time i went to a slumber party and about a month later i got invited to another one. and i asked her if i culd go and she said "But honey you just went to one lats week, so no." and it was so unfare! and she is not a cool mom and i want her to b a cool mom like my friends moms. they are awesome. my mom wears her pants past her bellybotton and tucks in her shirts and puts tissues in her pants!! she is weird how can i get her to stop! And i am not telling her so! HELPPPPP!
2007-10-14 10:06:54 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You poor thing, your mother loves you. How horrible for you.
Maybe you should stick around in here and read some of the questions from kids whose parents hit them, abuse them, have no where to turn to, or have no parents at all.
2007-10-14 10:16:30 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you can't tell her, you'r not giving her much credit. She loves you and you should relax when she shows her love this way. You'll always be her baby, even when you are 30! And when your that old you'll be SO happy when she still has those endearments for you. You need to ask her to take you out to lunch or something and have a serious discussion about how your getting older and believe she should allow you more freedom. Like sleepovers. My daughter is 7 1/2 and she has sleepovers practically every weekend. I just only let her stay with parents that I know and trust. Your Mom will always seem weird to you but I guarantee she works hard (in her own way) to make you happy. And even if it hurts her feelings she'll appreciate that you feel you can talk to her and be honest w/ her. I hope when my daughters are 13 they feel they can tell me anything. EVEN if it hurts my feelings...
2007-10-14 10:19:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
For one, YOU need to do some growing up! You may not have a "cool" mom, but you have one that cares about you and there are a whole lot of kids who can't say that!
As for some of the things you don't like, you DO need to talk about them. You need to sit down together and have a mother-daughter talk.
Present facts and requests reasonably and be open for compromise. It's sometimes best to do these things in a neutral environment, so how about going to McDonald's for a soda or ice cream.
On the kissing. You need to tell her that since you are growing up, that's OK as a private thing, but how about on the cheek? And perhaps in public limit to hugs? That's reasonable.
On sleepovers. Compromise. Ask if you can go to one once a month -- and don't whine about it if you've already used it up.
About the clothes. Why don't you ask to go shopping together? Have a mom-daughter shopping day? Be aware that as a mom she does NOT need to dress like an 18-year-old but perhaps you might be able to point out some mature, but nicer outfits. (I might also ask if she is self conscious because of weight or there are money issues?). You might ask a favorite aunt along whose style you admire.
To be quite honest however, you need to accept you may never have a "cool" mom and accept her as she is! Try inviting her into your group and confidences instead of shutting her out and that will help some too. AND, just remember how lucky you are to have a mom who loves you!
2007-10-14 10:15:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hWell first off you may hate it now but later on you will miss it. My dad died when I was 12 and it's hard like I missed all the parent bonding stuff. So you should be lucky to have parents. And also she loves you and this world has changed so much with all the violence and sex offenders out there I don't blame her. If I had children I would be too. Try to thing of things in her point of view. And just try to be her little girl for a little longer, because no offence you still are a child your only 13 years old. Just slow down on growing up ok? Life is too short to fuss over the little things I should know I did fuss when I was smaller. So just calm down and love your mom because it seems to me that she loves you a lot. And only what's the best for you.
2007-10-14 10:17:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
U R still a baby. Geeze. Only three years ago you were 10. "10"!!!!!!!!!
Cherrish these times. Trust me. Cuz when your out on your own having to pay heat, water, electricity. Have to find your own way. Have to work to live another day in a house YOU paid for with YOU'RE hard earned money. You are still being totted around in a car that you don't have to pat insurance on, you DONT have to pay for gas everytime you call your mommy to come and pick you up.
You are staying or free in a nice room and board with a woman who loves you dearly and wants the best for you. She probably doesn't want you ending up like those bitchy 13-15 year olds who's lives revolve around nonesense talk and clothes and cell phones. These kinds of girls usually start knockin' the boots around 15. Many get pregnant and expect their poor mothers to handle this new life while they are out having fun and STILL getting pregnant. She wants you to be intelligent and smart... NOT a giggling, rasin-minded BIMBO. She probably sees your choice in friends and sees these girls or guys for who they really are.
I'm not saying being a teenager and having fun is a bad thing. Just be careful about your peers. They can get you in a hella trouble. (Take it from ME.)
Naturally, she's parinoid that you are "budding". Give her time, and she'll get over this phase, just as you are giong through a phase as well.
When you turn 18 (I'm 19) Reality's gonna hit you HARD in the face. And you're gonna WISH someone was there call you a cute pet name, kiss you every now and then and tell you that they loved you everyday.
Know who your friends are. If you wish to be "SO grown-up" Learn how to stay safe. Be streetsmart and know when someone is taking advantage of you. Learn how to make it in the real world. Know what to do in a dangerous situation and how to KEEP out of danger. Learn to be the strong one and NOT to panic. Know who wants to help you and who wants to hurt you. People are cruel honey, they will take pleasure in watching you fall on your ***.
Learn how to avoid personators, molestors and the like. Learn to avoid being stolen from. (The thives and pickpockets are everywhere.) NEVER give your address to anyone fishy. People break in a terrorize and kill families and rape children brutally everyday. Scared yet? Well it's the world. And your mommy can't protect you from this world for long.
Tell your mom that you are going to make wise choices and that she has nothing to fear. Take a minute and look at yourself. Do you whine? Do you stomp? Do you leave the house in shambbles when she comes home after a hard day's work? Do your grades look like muck? Do you yell and treat Mom like crap and are a teenage NIGHTMARE? If so, expect a short leash.
2007-10-14 10:23:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
For the clothes she wears - is her birthday or anything coming up? If so, buy her some clothes you would like her to wear and give it to her as the present.
For the kissing on the lips - Next time she goes to kiss you on the lips, just kinda turn your head and let her kiss you on the cheek instead. She'll get the hint.
For the nickname - I think babydoll is kinda cute. But hey, one day just randomly bring up to her like "my name needs to be shortened into a good nickname." Then think of one you like and just say "Oh I know! ________" She'll call you by that.
For the sleepover things - Just say "mom that wasn't last weekend, it was a month ago. Can I please go?" but don't have all attitude because mom's hate that.
Hope I helped. Good luck!
2007-10-14 10:18:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are 13, not eighteen, so you are still your mothers child.
You should think yourself lucky that you have a Mom that is concerned about you and cares about you.
Your Mom does not have to be cool, she is responsible for your safety and well-being until you are an adult.
Lots of people do not like to wear low rise pants. It is your Moms business how she dresses, and not yours.
If you cannot be adult enough to sit down with your Mom and discuss that she embarrasses you....you need to give her respect and learn to deal.
I know many children who are in orphanages who would give anything to have a loving Mom who was caring and concerned for them.
It is whining like this that just proves your mothers point that you are still young and immature. Please learn to appreciate all the wonderful things your Mom does for you, treat her with respect and she will see you maturing and possibly give you a bit more freedom in the future.
I wish you and your Mom the best.
2007-10-14 10:18:46 · answer #7 · answered by Sue F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to change mom but you can talk about how you are getting older and some things seem childish like lip kissing
if it makes you feal weird and the pet names are a little embarsing, the over night pj parties maby she would agree
to one a month insted of every week it is your mothers job
to watch out for you. you are not done growing yet show
her respect and she may returne the favor be honest so
she can see that she can trust you. be glad you have a mother
who loves you enough to want to know where you are and
what you are doing. above all talk to her about your problems
and conserns so she dosen't feeal out of your life
2007-10-14 10:28:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tissues in her pants????? Are you sure she isn't wearing sanitary pads?
AS for fashion.....your mum would be heart broken if she knew how you felt.
Your Mum loves you and probably just wants to keep you near her as she loves you so much.
I'm a Mum of a 13 year old Boy and a 17 year old boy. I love them both and have learnt to give them some space to do things they enjoy.
I dress how I like to dress. Not all Mums are trendy. It;s having a loving parent that is important.
All I can suggest is that you have a heart to heart with your Mum to discuss how you feel about the slumber parties and restrictions you feel she is putting on you.
Mums still like to be hugged and kissed. I always kiss on the cheek. I agree with you that you you are too old to be kissed on lips.
2007-10-14 10:14:24 · answer #9 · answered by laplandfan 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I don't understand why you won't talk to her about it. The only way to change things is through communication. Don't attack her and tell her you want her to stop calling you by your petname. But calmly explain that you are getting older and want to be treated as such.
If you put her on the defense by saying that you don't want her to do things, she'll immediately put up her guard. Talk to her about things that are changing in your life as a result of your getting older and how these changes mean changes in other parts of your life as well. If you want to be treated like a grown-up, you need to act like one.
I personally still call my 19-year-old sister "sissy"! My 14-year-old sister is "pookie". It's just a term of endearment, not a baby name. Try to be a little more understanding of where she is coming from and take that into consideration when you speak with her.
I know your last sentence was "how can i get her to stop! And i am not telling her" but there is no way to change things if you can't tell her and be open with her. that's why most of your friends have "cool" moms. If you tell her what's going on in your life, she won't feel like she needs to protect you as much.
2007-10-14 10:14:58 · answer #10 · answered by lhtracey 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be thankful at least you mum gives a f**k about you i am the same age as you and she walked out on me and my brothers 6 month ago today. Start taking more responsibility for yourself and then she will treat you like an adult. Thats not unfair unfair is all the children starving in 3rd world country's and the victims of abuse that live right under our noses be thankful for what you have. Show some gratitude to your mum for every thing she does for you.
2007-10-14 10:14:55 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋