What do you do to cheer up young children when they have been disappointed by their father?

Question

Say the father says he will do something with the child & then does not do it. You can see the sadness & disappointment in the poor child's face, but what can you do?

His father lives with us & he doesn't do it all the time, but my son is 7 & is lately very close to his dad & it just makes me feel so bad for him when his dad backs out.....

Answer 1

I was in the same situation when my kids were younger except it was their Aunt (my Sister) that always told them she would do something with them and then she would back out at the last minute.
I hated it.
It always broke my heart.
So I would ask them to do whatever I knew they enjoyed doing, just to take their minds off of it.
I used to make excuses for my Sister all the time, now when my kids are in their teens they asked me to stop making excuses for her.
I know it's disappointing to them, but it also shows them that not everything in life turns out the way we want it to.
It's a hard lesson to learn :{

Answer 2

Perhaps you can do that thing that the father promised to do with the child in place of the father. Also if you ask the father to not make promises, it might help. One thing the child might like is if the father just shows up unexpectedly, and wants to go somewhere. That way there is no disappointment, but just surprise and joy.

Answer 3

I'm SO sorry you and your children are going through this. We hear of it much too often.

Certainly, you don't want to bad-mouth their father, but neither do you want to make excuses for him. Saying something simple like "I don't know why Daddy didn't make it" should suffice.

Let them talk out their feelings, if they want, and acknowlege those feelings.

Try to find something fun like playing kick-ball in the park or getting a treat.

Answer 4

I "let them help me" by putting them to work. They wash dishes for me, and collect their laundry, throw, yeah throw, their laundry in the wash. And When its done, they get to fold it, and put it all away. Then they take turns chasing the cats around with the vaccum. Then , when all the work is done, we go out for a light dinner at an actual restruant, and eat and then we all get our favorite deserts. We used to ride our bikes for ice cream cones, but its friggin cold.

When I was little, my brothers and I used to love going ice fishing with my dad. He'd leave without us if we weren't ready when his butt hit the seat. If ya made it, you get to go. If it took us too long to find our boots, hat, or gloves or skates or something, well, then you stood there, half ready in the driveway, bawling. My ma wouuld get us to help her with chores. Then we'd make homemade chocolate chip cookies. Ad eat them after a hard day of working.

Answer 5

You can't protect them from the realities of life. Instead of trying to cover up for his neglect why not let them realize on their own he is not someone who can be depended on.

Answer 6

Read a book with him or better yet make a craft with him or bake cookies with him!!!!!!!!!

Answer 7

try to do the thing he said he wouldnt do with them yourself