I feel like im too much of a good girl
im 20 and still a virgin!! sometimes im proud other times im not. i do want to have really bad but i cant just to do it i want it to be special and meaningful ya know. there was this guy who i have histlry with and i fell extremely hard for but he didnt want a relationship he just wanted to have fun. i dont know what signal i give off to guys to make them just want to have with me!! lol But i really wanted to be with him lol i even told him that i wanted him to be my first, and we were going to but then he told me he cares about me so we are just friends, i dont know what i did wrong there!! Any other dude would have jumped at it.Did i come on too strong?? Maybe he thought i was just not worth it all. He's 18 and he's alot more experienced then me, so i would think that he would jump at it. there was this one guy all he wanted to do was be my first he was always wanting to hang out. not this guy, i dont know what i did???
2007-10-14 09:03:13 · 29 answers · asked by iloveit 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe he thought i would get too attachment to him??? Its not like i just met him or he's a random guy we have history.
2007-10-14 09:04:04 · update #1
First, don't forget that you've waited this long and that's important.
Your close friend obviously cares a lot about you and meant what he said and had a great point. And apparently you had a reason for not sleeping with the "other Guy".
It will probably help you to make a list. Write down why you've waited this long, don't leave any reasons out. Also write down the benefits of waiting this long, and then write down all the reasons you want to go ahead and do this. I bet once you are looking at it on a piece of paper, you will better be able to see what you really want or having sex now is something that you still see as a priority.
2007-10-14 09:11:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didn't do anything wrong. Guys are animals.. well, a lot of them, and it is a notch on their belt to be the first to get a virgin. Sort of like they won in the game. The hunt was theirs.
First of all, when you give yourself to someone, it should be special, a lifelong commitment. You are throwing away perhaps the most special thing God gave to you, which is your virtue. Your virginity should go to the man you are going to share your life with, and not the first one who says I love you, as they will say anything to get what they want, then go. It is something once lost that you can NEVER get back, and your husband to be, deserves that special gift that only you can give to him. The wait is worth it sweetheart.. Anything worth having is well worth waiting for. And nothing worth having comes easy. So save yourself. Your dignity, your pride, your body for the right man. Your husband. You will never ever be sorry.
I am proud of that guy for saying no to you. It shows he has some decency in him to say the least. Maybe he knew it would not become a lasting relationship with the two of you and he didn't want to be the one to destroy a lifelong dream and maybe he respected you enough to back away. You should thank him for that.
2007-10-14 16:12:53 · answer #2 · answered by texas.okie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, yes he thought you would get attached to him. You are older than him, more in a place to have a relationship. Do you remember the move Wedding Crashers? The part when they have sex on the beach and after she says "Were going to be so happy together, I knew my first time would be on a beach" Ya men a so afraid of that. That is why unless you in a relationship with the person for their first time or it's a one night stand men a afraid of us! You did not do anything wrong, don't worry about it. Find a guy that is a little older than you that is interesting and likes you for you, and does not mind your a virgin. Don't do just to do it! Believe me I did when I was young and I regret it everyday.
2007-10-14 16:10:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I cant really out myself in your position even tho I am a virgin im only 14, but, I think maybe he was just scared. Maybe if he doesn't feel the same way as you do then he's not the right one for you. Maybe you need to find someone who loves you just like you love him adn then get married and really think hard about what you wany in life before you go giving away something as special as your virginity! Good Luck!
2007-10-14 16:08:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's just not interested in you that way or maybe he thinks he's not good enough. But its always good to wait for someone who will make it special. Maybe he didn't think he could do that.
Better to be a virgin than give your virginity to some creep who wouldn't want you anyway. Its better to stay a virgin and give it to someone who really loves you because thats supposed to be something special. I'm your age and I really wish I would've waited to give mine to someone who would've made it special instead of just worrying about satisfying is horny self.
Its a regret that stays in the back of your head forever...no matter who you are or how many times you've done it, The first time is the one you'll remember. Maybe he didn't want to give you that regret or BE that regret.
2007-10-14 16:09:31 · answer #5 · answered by Rina 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he had a sudden attack of conscious! He obviously doesn't feel the same way about you. Why not wait for someone where it really does matter and you care about each other, or even love each other and want to get married eventually, God forbid!
Don't be in a hurry. I lost my virginity at 20 and it was a huge disappointment. I really wished I had waited until a serious relationship later.
2007-10-14 16:07:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Girl friend you have a special friend in the guy... You did nothing wrong he just has too much respect for you to do that with out some more deep and more committed relationship... He is a good friend indeed.... And the next time you are so ready to give it up talk to him first ...I don't think he will lead you the wrong why....
2007-10-14 16:10:46 · answer #7 · answered by diva102288 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen, it sounds like he respected you enough to know that you both were not going to havea serious relationship, and didn't want your first time to be a one night stand that meant nothing.
You are lucky that he was deceant, most guys would have jumped at the chance. You dont want to have sex with just anyone. believe me, once the act is done, there is NO taking it back, and you dont want to have any regrets. BE PROUD and wait for the right guy.
By the way...the right guy will WAIT....I would say if he waits 3 months.....he's okay.
2007-10-14 16:09:00 · answer #8 · answered by becccy231278 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't rush into having sex just because everybody at your age is doing it. If you are decided that you want too loose one of the most valuable things women have "virginity" go ahead, but make sure you will not feel used, dirty and regret it. If you are at least get in a relationship and last with that guy at least 5-6 months and if you think is right go ahead. Love your body and don't hurry yourself to doing it. BE CAREFULL!!
2007-10-14 16:11:02 · answer #9 · answered by YessiCakes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Basically this guy did the right thing. Hard to believe, huh? He didn't want a relationship so he didn't want to be the one to take your virginity. He did something nice which you shouldn't take to be anything against you. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong at all. He may very well not be at a place in his life where he wants a relationship.
2007-10-14 16:07:37 · answer #10 · answered by howlermonkey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋