20 years ago I broke up with a great guy and he left before I finished telling him why. (I didn't think I was good enough for him) he hates me. I don't want to get back together with him but it has bothered me for years how can I tell him what I really thought and he was great. I really wanted to be friends and I heard later he was going to ask me to marry him. I had no idea whatsoever. I would like to talk just to clear air even just for 15 minutes.???
2007-10-13 11:37:25 · 9 answers · asked by sandih 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I've had a slightly similar experiance to yours and I too would love the chance to explain to him "all the reasons why", but it's been so long that I doubt it would do either of us any good and for sure he's moved on in his life, so I think that it's better that you do too.
What good will it really do to either of you anyway?
I know that you are probably suffering some feelings of guilt about the situation (as am I in mine), but if you do contact him, what do you really think will change?
If you do contact him, you might be bringing up bad feelings for him that he may have learned to leave behind. Why put him through more pain?
I say, sad as it is, just let sleeping dogs lie. It's over. Try to move on.
2007-10-14 05:59:30 · answer #1 · answered by shywink 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would contact him and tell him how you feel and your reasonings for breaking up with him. I don't think there's any harm in clearing the air and closing that chapter of your life.
Stay Strong.
Stay Positive.
2007-10-13 11:48:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you from my own experience to just leave it alone. You'll just make him feel like Sh** all over again.
My guy abandoned me and I was pregnant. After 20 some years he called me to expound on his reasons for leaving. It's so nice for him to get it off his chest and it just made me miserable, sad and angry ALL OVER AGAIN! Thanks for nothing. The ONLY reason why I didn't chew him out was because the son he had after he abandoned me died a couple of years ago in a car crash. I just said thanks and hung up.
If you want to feel better, volunteer at a homeless shelter.
2007-10-13 11:50:32 · answer #3 · answered by TotalRecipeHound 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lots of us carry simillar feelings of guilt. I think the harsh truth is you left him because you thought he wasn't good enough for you. It's hard to admit it but the guilt complex is self indulgent and self deluding don't you think? It makes you feel moral but it's not honest. I speak from my experience which may be different to yours. If so, sorry.
2007-10-13 11:46:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and tell him only if you really have good intentions and just want to clear things up.
2007-10-13 11:43:02 · answer #5 · answered by andrea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him only if both of you are still single, do not but in if he is married.
2007-10-13 11:48:33 · answer #6 · answered by goertzenfranz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its twenty YEARS ago, start moving on. I'm sure he has. he likely has a good reason for hating you. Forget about it.
2007-10-13 11:41:28 · answer #7 · answered by zanthus 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ok 20 years ago get over it! im sure he has!
2007-10-13 11:52:20 · answer #8 · answered by preciousanime 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you know where he lives or how to contact him do it
if it is easier for you, send him a letter
2007-10-13 11:41:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋